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Open request to Induslady

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by drjp, Oct 1, 2009.

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Oct 1, 2009 #1
drjp Senior IL'ite

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Dear Malathy,

Let me start by congratulating you on creating a wonderful platform for Indian women to gather and discuss various issues.

I am not sure if helping women in abusive relationship was on your original objectives to meet, but this forum has successfully turned itself into a strong support system for women in emotional need.

I have been on the other side of abusive relationship, and appreciate how simple supportive sentences such as "you are doing the right thing", and "you can do it" matter. It matters to every one in an abusive relationship (I am not gender biased here, sometimes it is women and sometimes men). There are a lot of wonderful counselors on this forum that take time to help people.

However, there are inherent risks with helping the victims in an open forum. In the past, when PM service was free, we were able to talk to each other freely and help the other person emotionally. Just be their bouncing boards, so that they can gather enough energy to fight their battles.

That said, it breaks my heart to see women come to forum emotionally battered and on the verge of breakdown, with a constant fear that their husband might get around to this site.

Here is my request:
Ideally, it would be nice to set up an Induslady battered women help line...however, I understand that is a huge task.

Can you designate a small team or one moderator that can be a relay ground to such people to communicate with a member or poster for more specific information?

I do not mind paying for a PM service that is open ended as in, anybody can PM that person?

I am sorry for making this open but I could not PM you .
I would be more than glad to discuss this with you, if you have any questions or concerns.
Thanks
drjp

drjp, Oct 1, 2009

drjp, Oct 1, 2009

#1

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Oct 1, 2009 #2

SriVidya75 Platinum IL'ite

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woww...this is really a very commendable initiative...

Good one JP!!

Last edited: Oct 1, 2009

SriVidya75, Oct 1, 2009

SriVidya75, Oct 1, 2009

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Oct 2, 2009 #3

Malyatha Gold IL'ite

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I STRONGLY second drjp.

Malathy, please consider this request. While economics is important, having the pm service as a paid-for, member-only one means that women in abusive relationships, with no access to money or financial resources, would not be able to communicate privately with other members or mods in order to ask for help / support. Instead, they would be forced to post on a public forum and run the risk of being identified by their already abusive spouses. It would be a humanitarian gesture on your part to have pm available as a "one-ended" feature where anyone can msg an individual that has this feature attached to / activated on her account.

Alternatively, you could have this feature available to only moderators so that anyone can pm a mod for help.

Just a request.

Thank you for your consideration.

Malyatha, Oct 2, 2009

Malyatha, Oct 2, 2009

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Oct 2, 2009 #4

sundarusha Gold IL'ite

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I too strongly second drjp.

sundarusha, Oct 2, 2009

sundarusha, Oct 2, 2009

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Oct 2, 2009 #5

Nandshyam IL Hall of Fame

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Good thought,JP!!!!

But it wouldn't be an easy task me thinks. All members account should be setup in a way they can PM only this person and not anyone. When I say all, its the new ones who might register in future as well.

I think like it happened today for venus, the member in need can just quote in the thread, she needs to talk privately. Mods can then validate and initiate the handshake.

My 2 cents

Nandshyam, Oct 2, 2009

Nandshyam, Oct 2, 2009

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Oct 2, 2009 #6

drjp Senior IL'ite

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Nandu,
Thanks for your input.
The only problem I see there, is we have to divulge our private email ID's.

For e.g.,Hypothetical situation: say Preethi sets up the "handshake" between some xy that is beat up by her husband everyday and I. I have XY's email and XY has mine. If XY's husband has access to her email account and gets my ID, the entire purpose of anonymity is killed right? On the other hand, it is very easy for such a system to be misused.

drjp

P.S. , ....drjp please, dr by no means is meant to be the salutation here !

Last edited: Oct 2, 2009

drjp, Oct 2, 2009

drjp, Oct 2, 2009

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Oct 2, 2009 #7

sunitha Gold IL'ite

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DRJP,one thing I don't understand here.Are you asking for free pm access to the mod for that person who needs help? What is the mod supposed to do if that person contacts her? Is the mod supposed to solve her problem or help her out by connecting here with someone else who can help? How will the mod do this? I am wondering:roll:

I support your idea but I am not clear on this.

sunitha, Oct 2, 2009

sunitha, Oct 2, 2009

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Oct 2, 2009 #8

Spiderman1 Gold IL'ite

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drjp said: ↑

Here is my request:
Ideally, it would be nice to set up an Induslady battered women help line...however, I understand that is a huge task.

Can you designate a small team or one moderator that can be a relay ground to such people to communicate with a member or poster for more specific information?

I do not mind paying for a PM service that is open ended as in, anybody can PM that person?

Thanks
drjp
Click to expand...

I support this request. It would work best if the PM can be sent to a "small team" alias, or basically an alias which a few core team members have access to. Trusted people, or proven counselors can be part of that small team.

This will greatly help the people who are in real trouble and need help.

Nice idea drjp.

Spiderman1, Oct 2, 2009

Spiderman1, Oct 2, 2009

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Oct 2, 2009 #9

swati_gan Senior IL'ite

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Good thought JP, Malyatha.

swati_gan, Oct 2, 2009

swati_gan, Oct 2, 2009

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Oct 2, 2009 #10

Priya_Mommy Gold IL'ite

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I too second all of you!!
This is truely commendable!!!Hope Malathy should hear to this!!

Priya_Mommy, Oct 2, 2009

Priya_Mommy, Oct 2, 2009

#10

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