only selfish no touch relationship inlaws family

hi
from starting date to till(5 years) now my mil doesnt speak to me fdirectly ..whatever she wants to tell she conveys to my husbend..she doesnt speak abt what is happinenig in our family as well as relations ..she doest touch whatever i touched or mine related things..for ex if i bought tomato is not available in home ..she doesnt touch and she bought new one...if i boiled milk she do new one..if bought vim bar/ new one ..if she cleans house she doest clean my room even new baby arrived to home.(2 nd baby at that time)..if baby cries she doent come and hold..only thing she will do cook that is also her preference..if i ask anything other than that for dish will not be good..she slept at 8.30 to 9.00 pm morning 7.00 to 8.00 she will get up..she wont pick the first kid with her for sleep ..whatever i have to manage it ..she doest care grand kid is hers ..only she pickus up for her relaxion maxi.one hour in the day..i dont know whe she is doing like this

my husband not sharing anything to me..

My husband also not telling anything about his office ,financial things and what is happeing in his family side..but he wants to know abt my family things..i dont know anything about his family current activities ...the only time i know when i met his relations on occession s..his we were in US 2 years and we came for
ssister marriage we stuck in visa ..we stayed in India till now ...they spent lavishly for her marriage and we got some finacial problems..mil/sil doent care abt spending money she spent money to whatever she wants to buy she bought..
He doesnt ask single word ahe money spent. every month he put money for everything...but in our home he is doing budget..we have to sp end withinothat..otherwise we wont get saving money..he spent... money lavishly for her ssister and her in laws family.all are selfish whatever they need they will do /buy...no adjustment
now he is scolding me for everything whatever happening to him/them ..my kid s very young 3,5 yrs scolding a lot and beating her for small things.. too worried ..

 

thanks for reply

aarna ne more thing abt my husband he doesnt want to talk abt these things through open talk ..if i say anything he goes to the room or went outside.otherwise he is so calm and read a book like nothing has happened.if i say anything abt his mom dont say anything..he is shouting with anger in any where..not mind anything...my baby is too much scared if he calls her second time .. he doest want to go along with him outside..he doent care abt what is my/kids feelings.. worried abt thinking this and how to change this attitude..he thinks he wants to live alone all the time ..he likis es to read ...so his kids doent disturb..he doest play with kids or no outside visits with kids..
how to change this attitude..is anyone faced like this ..