One day off from...

Sriniketan · Oct 29, 2007

Dear friends,
I wanted to take a day off from my regular duties.
That day came and I was ready to implement my plans of what to do and what not to do, on that day.
One full day without the duties of a mother ( yelling, advicing, etc.)
Without duties of a wife ( waiting for my husband to return from office and give him food, etc)
but this duty of a DIL cannot have a day off! ----Dutiful dil!:-o

without the duty of a telephone operator-- attending the phone andhanding over the phone to the kids and my hubby whenever someone calls them over!

One whole day for me alone with the computer, no disturbance from my kids.

One whole day for me to do all things I wanted to do, peacefully without any disturbance, including the cleaning, reading, chatting.....

That day came on Nov. 26 when my husband and the kids were off to NY to attend the wedding of our friends's daughter.

But what happened on that day---I chatted with my cousin on the Messenger and also with a friend, cooked food, prayed, cleaned, gave food to my mil and everything went on as planned, but as the day passed, I began to feel the absence of kids and my husband.The house became like deserted one without the footsteps of my kids and hubby. I was thinking of them as to what they are doing now, what did they eat and the like.

ok, this same feeling must have gone through our parents when we leave them either for an education or after marriage.

Some thing striked my mind and I myself asked the question--- we can take a day off physically, but is it possible to take a day off, mentally.

I think this is possible only when we permanently take off from this world!

sriniketan

malspie · Oct 29, 2007

Hi Sri,

The last line of your post answers your query.. We cannot live with what we are used to.. Take a break from office, first two days I feel relaxed, the next two days, I am feeling uneasy, the last two days i am eager to catch up with my duties. What was boring to me a week ago, suddenly becomes worth doing after I go away from it. These duties keep us occupied and help us spend the long time on the stage called "LIFE". Without all these duties, we would all ask God to take us back in his arms.

Good post, Sri...

Tamildownunder · Oct 29, 2007

Dear Sriniketan,

Yes. It is a longing thought to take a day off physically as well as mentally. As you have said it may be possible to take a day off physically, but mentally it is very difficult as we get tuned over the period. I have heard in Japan, there are special rooms with a narrow entrance and where only one person can stay. There will be no TV, Comp. or telephone. One has to take a book if one wants to spend time. People go to these rooms to take off mentally as well as physically. Before my children left for U.S. I used to long for a day off. But, after they went I found difficult to push time and reconcile to the loneliness.

Regards,

TDU

Tulasi · Oct 30, 2007

Hi Sri,
Very well composed words. I agree with you we can get some days off physically but not mentally. some time even I feel like taking a break from the kids for a day or so but when hubby takes them for two hours some where I start missing them very quickly..
Tulasi

Sriniketan · Oct 30, 2007

Thanks, Mals for your quick response.
It is true that this duty keeps us in this world to lead the life.
But what about some people running away from their duties....

sriniketan

Sriniketan · Oct 30, 2007

TDU Sir,
This practice in Japan reminds me of the song--'yaengae nimmadhi, yaengae nimmadhi, angae yenakkoru idam vendum'.
As parents we go through this emotion more or less often.

sriniketan

Sriniketan · Oct 30, 2007

Tulasi,
thanks for your response.
Maybe this is called 'parental love' or the 'motherly love' in our case.

sriniketan

Anandchitra · Oct 30, 2007

Bhargavi
You have written so well and very interesting topic. Trust me when I say i have been there. I usually plan what I want to do. Mostly it is to gather my girlfriends and watch movies and eat .been able to do so.These days with the cell phone I know i can be reached and can reach family members too. Just my thoughts.. le tme know what you think..

sunkan · Oct 30, 2007

dear srini,
very nice article and i know what u mention here because i have had the same experience of husband and kids going away on a holiday, and the first day used to be so great i used to switch on the music do all my work in meticulous without others disturbing, those days i never had a computer, and it was a variety of stuff i was doing, gardening was a pleasure, with waiting for the new blooms to come and pruning and spraying medicines and so on, but the third day i will start feeling very lonely, i would be worried whether the children are treated well, will they eat without fussing and what my husband would do, will he loose temper on them and so on...thanks for bringing back those memories and the word is mother for all these descriptions...sunkan

Sriniketan · Oct 31, 2007

Dear AC,
Of course, you can reach them through our wireless communication and be satisfied, but the feeling of vacancy is still there, isn't it.

Sriniketan