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On The Topic Of Putting Out

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by Identical123, Mar 19, 2018.

  1. Identical123

    Identical123 New IL'ite

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    I've seen this term being used a lot on this forum. Even as a women I can't get my head around why women would have this mentality. My guess would be husband is not attractive enough, not attentive enough etc or he fails to satisfy in bed which leads to resentment building up for a long time until breaking point. I understand why it could be hard sometimes [Too tired] but from the way some women here talk , they treat intimacy as a part time job or something.

  2. SGBV

    SGBV IL Hall of Fame

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    Not really.

    Lack of intimacy alone not the prime reason for putting out. There are plenty of other reasons, including lack of intimacy to stray away.
    Mainly it is about someone's morality and the way how he/she balances his/her life in general. When you give so much priority to intimacy, and are obsessed with it, it becomes very difficult to control your urge to stray away
    Secondly the opportunity. Some people are well disciplined until they are exposed to certain opportunity to stray away.
    And more importantly, it has got something to do with the amount of love and respect you have for your spouse. That's why many women/men do not stray despite of their spouses being ill/unable to perform due to health reasons.

    It is like this....
    Food is important to live. If you are starved, then you are likely to eat whatever available to survive.
    But not everyone is ready to eat **** just because they are made to starve.
    Not everyone is ready to steal from other's place for the same reason.
    Not everyone eats stale food, or plastic or something not made to eat, just because they are starving.
    And that's why many people live with hunger and fight against hunger for life.
    Many people identify the right reasons for their starvation, and find remedies by correcting it, looking for food elsewhere.

    Likewise, if intimacy is lacking in a marriage, it is important to find the reason behind it, and address it. If there is no solution, then it is important to end the marriage, and find solutions elsewhere (re-marriage etc).
    But straying away, EMA, cheating can not be justifiable just because your marriage lacks intimacy
    beautifullife30 likes this.

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