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O Paalanhaare

Discussion in 'Poetry' started by SuiDhaaga, Jul 31, 2021.

  1. SuiDhaaga

    SuiDhaaga Platinum IL'ite

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    God we aren't asking
    You to stop the storm
    We want strength
    To stride through it
    As if it were the norm

    God we aren't asking
    You to make things easier
    So everything is given
    To us while we sit
    We want brains and wit
    So we have the ability
    To work hard and earn it

    God we aren't asking
    You to smash our enemies
    But show us
    How to attain your Blessings
    And shower our moments
    With lovely memories

    God we aren't asking
    You to make the pain go away
    With the snap of your fingers
    But show how to search
    For the answers
    So the agony no longer lingers

    God hear the cries of our heart
    Our purest prayers
    Don't let us shriek
    For the same reason
    Make us understand
    That for everything there
    Is a time and a season



    I loved the song and people's thoughtful comments

     

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  2. Hopikrishnan

    Hopikrishnan Platinum IL'ite

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    I used the lyric-translate google to find out what the dickens was all that about. Now I have the feeling that SD is better off without the images and videos attachments to the poetry. The song-lyrics are so close to the poetic expressions, that they taint the latter with a non-originality shade.

    Like... here is a video-song about some gripe that's going on... and here is my poem about the same gripe. The song in the video is in Swahili language, but the poem is in English. This is never the good optics for a poet.

    Shed the attachments, and let your poetry soar/sour on its own.
    @Mistt Tagging you to let you know that it is perfectly OK to review a poet/poetry to tell exactly where the problem is. Anyone who posts on any forum thrive on meaningful, and committed feedbacks....whether it be deceptively positive or truthfully critical.
     
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  3. SuiDhaaga

    SuiDhaaga Platinum IL'ite

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    You know, I get lot of poetry inspiration all of a sudden and sometimes I struggle to find the perfect photo, video, etc.

    Other times, my poetry is about the particular video, i.e. a Bhajan for instance.

    That is a good point.

    My recent poems (you won't believe when and where I get the ideas), just strike my heart, I cannot find a photo to describe.

    Will try this.

    Thank you for your feedback!
     

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