NRI's are they money makers?

Discussion in 'General Discussions' started by 123NICE, Apr 23, 2010.

  1. Mahajanpragati

    Mahajanpragati Platinum IL'ite

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    Re: Money Makers

    hi nice,
    helping others at expense of ur own family is wrong.remember charity begans at home.
    well,u & ur dh needs to decide where u are going to draw line.helping mil to run her own household is good but helping bil,sil & their kids is not........

    many a times son of family who is working abroad want people to feel how much he is earning so can't say no to any monetary demands from them.....is ur dh in that category.
    afterall they are not going to come to ur place & demand money.all it needs is to say no .even if they give missed call u guys call them back & tell strictly that no is a no & nothing is going to make u change ur decision.worse comes to worse get another number.use new number for day to day activity & old one only to call India.this way u need not attend their phone always & give them ur new number

    let them think wahtever they want to think.already these people must have labelled u guys as fools who are always open for any sort of sob story.......
    or best of all.tell them u guys need money from them.make some geniune sounding reason like buying house or leaving job for higher studies or buisnes.see how they react.soon all phone calls will stop & they will not even attend urs.
    pragati
     
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  2. 123NICE

    123NICE Junior IL'ite

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    Re: Money Makers

    Thanks Srividya, Gooseberry and Mahajanpragati for your reply.

    "many a times son of family who is working abroad want people to feel how much he is earning so can't say no to any monetary demands from them.....is ur dh in that category."

    Mahajanpragati, My DH is not in this category. But he is very softhearted person. If someone tells any sobbing story, he will believe since he faced lot problem after his dad passed away. He used to altered his dad's dress for him when he was schooling. he couldnot finish his master even he got 88% in Bachelor.

    It took 8 years for me to show his sibilings real color. But still, he could not believe mentally. He is asking, how come they are changing? He thought , his brothers , sisters and her husbands also are gem of persons like his dad. My MIL is living GOD. My FIL was very honest person .

    What is my BIL contribution ? good question ...

    They clearly mention to SILs and MIL, They cannot give anything like my DH. One BIL asked my MIL to live with him, MIL refused it. I need money only. I don't want to live with you. (MIL told this info to my husband).

    Nobody talks to me and my kids from my husband family. They asked my jewels and salary after my marriage. I was asking, Why should i give my salary and jewels to you. MY 2nd SIL's husband told, we are choosing you as wife to my DH is
    reason 1. your are working and earning and
    Reason 2. you don't have any brother.
    Then they indirectly threaten me, if I am not giving they will re-marriage to my husband. I said, GO head and do whatever you want. (I told everything to my DH, He was not believing me)
    Afterthat, i had hi and by relationships.

    After few years, they said "we are planning to buy 5 flats(3SIL and 2BIL) in chennai". So, i need to send money for them. I clearly said, No. Then nobody is not talking to me, They are talking to my DH only.
    Nowaday 2 BIL is not asking anything, But both of them supporting 3SILs and MIL behaviour. They are believing , we will buy flat for them.
    2BIL never call my DH also. I don't know the reason. My DH only call them once in a two months. I don't know anything about my co-sisters.
    And I noted one point, Whenever they need money from my DH, they are asking very politely and telling sobbing story etc, , But if it is me , they are commending me. We always end up fighting, so They are creating bad image in front of my DH and other relatives

    Intial periods, i am also thinking, Supporting own sibiling is our duty since they don't have father. But problem is they are expecting the same after they settled also. In Tamil, There is one proverb "Rusi kannda Poonai "...

    Back to current situation, We are decided, we are going to Say Big NO to other relatives first...
    Let's see.



    Thanks everyone for your support.
     
  3. SriVidya75

    SriVidya75 Platinum IL'ite

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    Re: Money Makers

    Nice

    If you are super nice and bend down this is what happens. To buy flats for BILs and SILs why the hell your husband would send money???:bonkI dotn get it. Doesnt the BIL earn and buy his own home? cant the SILs husband earn adn buy home for themselves? why these demands only from your husband?? Because....he bends down. he feels responsible...he wants to be super nice...

    Taking care of parents & siblings is his responsibility. agreed! but to what extent??? set a decided amount per month and send only that much amount. not a penny more or less! Set limit and follow it strictly. Close your ears and eyes. You can clearly see when people lie and cry for money to meet unnecessary demands. Cutoff such emotional blackmails calls or mails or talks. Be at it.
     
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  4. kma

    kma Gold IL'ite

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    Re: Money Makers

    Nice,


    you can do somethings. Deposit some amount for your kids from your husband's salary and other investments so that the disposable income will reduce. you need to take care of your kids' requirements. And SIL+BILs are all grown up now . They dont require spoon feeding even today. Once the money from your salaries is tied up, it will be very easy to say NO without guilt. From their behaviour can u expect any help from them if tomorrow u require any help from them for your kids? Wise up.

    If there is a medical emergency or some such thing, nobody has a problem. But for every small thing why you people have to foot the bill?
     

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