No Separation Anxiety In 18 Months Old

mohini16 · Oct 12, 2020

Hi , I am first time mom and my 18 months old doesn't have any separation anxiety at all , even if i pretend to go outside of main door and close the door but I am standing outside to watch , she will come close to door will try to open 3-4 times and go back to whatever she was doing before , she doesn't care I left house .
I am freaking out , any of you have experienced this in your toddler ? if it was delayed then when do they start feeling separation anxiety ?

blindpup10 · Oct 12, 2020

Some kids have severe separation anxiety some don't. My kid was just like yours. He would go with everyone and anyone without looking for me.. even from a much younger age like 9 months. He has never cried if someone new took him without me being in his sight.

He even went to day care at 18 months without any tantrums or separation anxiety being an issue.
However, I saw his anxiety when we moved him to a Montessori when he was around 3. The first few months were tough, as he didn't know anyone. He never cried during the drop off...but he would hug my leg and say dont go, read a book, stay and play with me. [If he was engaged immediately he went inside, he wouldn't even say bye to me] and pick up were the worst. He wouldn't want to leave.

This phase was until he made a friend. After my kid felt secured at his new school. He was very comfortable during the drop off and looking forward for pickup.

My 2 cents- your kid is not showing separation anxiety coz she feels secure in your house and environment she is in.Maybe she will not be when you take her to a new place and you are out of her sight.

GregoriaBoul · Oct 12, 2020

Separation anxiety comes with no right age, if you are solely attached to a person or something then for sure you will experience SA.

BhumiBabe · Oct 12, 2020

My son started a part time day care at 18 months, and I dealt with no separation anxiety. He was actually excited to go to school, at least for the first 2 weeks. He started crying a bit during the last 2 weeks of the month...but was fine once he bonded with the care provider.

If your kid is not bothered, there is nothing wrong with that. They just have absolute trust that you will come back. Some children are more sensitive to the separation.

Thyagarajan · Oct 12, 2020

Baby gets the feel of impending absence of mom for long hours from triggers like

Mother in front of mirror with cosmetics

Mother wearing outdoor dresses and or apparel’s

Keeping ready her vanity bag, lunch box in visible range

And so on and so forth.
The smell of talcum powder mom dabbing on her cheeks would wake the baby up or draw her to mom ...

If these triggers are absent, then baby would assume mom is not leaving home.

Anbhu · Oct 12, 2020

My son was also the same. From his birth it was only me and my Husband. I was with him 24X7, no grand parents, friends or relatives. So I think he never had the feeling "Some one else is carrying me I need to go to my mom". Since I was with him 24x7 he considered me as "she is always there" feeling. When he started his daycare he started crying, in the evening while I go to pick up he was all excited and happy, and I was pleasantly surprised to see him miss me.