No gifts by husband :(

Dear OP,
its the same scenario here as well. My H thinks all expensive gifts have to be given by my parents and am the only child for my parents. However just on my marriage day, he gets me an expensive saree. that's all. however you need to mention that you do like surprises.

 

oh.. talking about my H..I can go on whole day.

He forced me to accept gifts when we were dating. After marriage, like he pushed stop button. He started feeling pressure when b-days/anniv would come and I on the other hand would go all the lengths to buy things for him..even when I did not want or hated him, just for the sake for celeb, I would buy.

But now he says..do you want something? lets not ? why do bdays-annivs come? Seriously..
No one else gifts or even cares to wish me for bday/anniv...even as a child. For my bro-sis, I was doing everything before marriage..and even after marriage, cards/sometimes gifts if possible.

He does not send gifts as such from US to his family but calls filled with so much love. Same he can do here....If not buy a rose for V-day.

Anyways now I have accepted he is stupid. Even if directed with written instructions his bald mind does not get anything.

 

I agree to most of your comments on H. I also read the thread most unromantic things husband did and it was hilarious.

There is this male chauvinism or EGO where does the wifego especially from the second year of marriage. Sometimes Men take Women forgranted and Women takes Men for granted.
I hope your DH’s will realize the importance of givingand the happiness in giving, even a rose given with LOVE is well appreciated byWomen. It can be given any day not only on Birthday’s or V days. And these areSpecial Occasions.
As I said in other post Gifts should be given out of LOVEand not with conditions or customs or obligations.
In my Case I havenever gifted my Mother a saree or a Mobile Phone. Of course I sent her moneyand asked her to buy whatever she wants and I gave lot of things to be my Ex W….
Have a Happy day…..Countyour Blessings….

Here is a song that I like by Pharrell Williams and many have created there own versions. you can find them in Youtube..Happy Happy Happy....
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y6Sxv-sUYtM

 

Im in the same boat ladies, mine says as an excuse .. Look, i never sayd Im romantic so i never lied na?! last two gifts i got was some kitchen knifes and a water cooker.....two different occassions!
But here´s my strategy as im in the middle of an experiment :coffee

1. I always used to get him small gifts when im in city and give it to him on festivals or other little occassions, even I know he wont have anything for me i will give to him. I wrap it and get him chocolates.... I give smiling and show it comes from heart =
a. i really do love gifting and im happy to make someone happy so it doesnt matter for me that moment if i get something in return or not
b. He startet to observe my behavior and realised i do it because it makes me happy and he startet to feel ashamed he doesnt get things for me.. so half year ago he startet to "try" the "gifting thing" himself.. got me some chocolates.. and well.. the water cooker :crazy (he thought it was helpfull as ours was crappy)

2. I dont only gift him i gift myself too!!
As i happen to like flower bouquets i sometimes get one for me to place it decorately on the kitchen table.. i too got myself some little roses in a pink pot, looking very romantic and everytime i make a big oooohhhhh guess what i got... oooohhh someone very sweet gifted me such beatiful pink roses creating a scene like some movie heroine who has a secret admirer... 2 weeks ago it finally happend.. i came home and saw some pritty purple tulip flowers on the kitchen table :mrgreen: and received a phone call by him where he made sure i found it .... experiment to be continued.....

 

A very sweet attempt.. !! Good Luck to you.

Kitchen Knives . .Hm hm.. My DH doesn't GIFT such risky items .

 

Sometimes men and children are similar.

When he is in good mood, try praising him. Praise his ability to always make everything so special. praise his ability to plan and organize. Praise his generosity. Start this weeks, if not months in advance.

Then pick a neutral ocassion like valentines day (which is about both of you not just a celeberation of you like birthday). Tell him you are looking forward to spending time together and since he is so good at coming up with fun stuff to do you will let him plan. Then see what he does. May be he wont gift you. But he may plan a nice dinner and a card. Again, heap praises of what a wonderful restaurant he chose. The card was so thoughtful and make sure he over hears you telling your friend/mom about this wonderful 'surprise' he planned.

Then repeat again for next ocassion.

 

Hi

We are always taken for granted. I get funny replies that you are also part of me ! !

Just look at the positive side and you give some surprise taking the lead. The era has changed that man only should get gift for wife.

Eventually he might change. Don't get disappointed ! Everyone is not destined for everything they like.