Discussion in 'Jokes' started by Arunarc, Nov 26, 2007.

  1. Arunarc

    Arunarc Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Tim came home from the bar late one Friday evening stinking drunk, as
    he often did, and crept into bed beside his wife who was already asleep.

    He gave a peck on the cheek and fell asleep. When he awoke he found a
    strange man standing at the end of his bed wearing a long flowing white

    "Who the hell are you?" demanded Tim, "and what are you doing in my
    bedroom? ". The mysterious Man answered "This isn't your bedroom and I'm
    Yama". Tim was stunned "You mean I'm dead!!! That can't be, I have so
    much to live for, I haven't said goodbye to my family?. you've got to
    send me back straight away".

    Yama replied "Yes you can be reincarnated but there is a catch. We can
    only send you back as a dog or a hen." Tim was devastated, but knowing
    there was a farm not far from his house, he asked to be sent back as a
    hen. A flash of light later he was covered in feathers and clucking
    around pecking the ground. "This ain't so bad" he thought until he felt
    this strange feeling welling up inside him.

    The farmyard rooster strolled over and said "So you're the new hen, how
    are you enjoying your first day here?" "It's not so bad" replies Tim,
    "but I have this strange feeling inside like I'm about to explode".

    "You're ovulating" explained the rooster, "don't tell me you've never
    laid an egg before".

    "Never" replies Tim

    "Well just relax and let it happen"

    And so he did and after a few uncomfortable seconds later, an egg pops
    out from under his tail. An immense feeling of relief swept over him and
    his emotions got the better of him as he experienced motherhood for the
    first time. When he laid his second egg, the feeling of happiness was
    overwhelming and he knew that being reincarnated as a hen was the best
    thing that ever happened to him? ever!!!

    The joy kept coming and as he was just about to lay his third egg he
    felt an enormous smack on the back of his head and heard his wife

    "Tim, wake up you drunken bastard, you're shitting on the bed."

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