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Newly Married - Questions about Intimacy!

Discussion in 'Intimacy' started by lalithakumar, Apr 3, 2008.

  1. Vasumathy

    Vasumathy Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Hi Benice,
    Relaxation is the key. Don't push yourself hard. Try to involve in IC & enjoy your time together. Things will go fine with that.
    Take care.
    All the best to your happy married life!

    All credits on IL goes to the administrators, all Moderators and to all ILites who participate in this forum.
     
  2. Caroline999

    Caroline999 New IL'ite

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    <!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:WordDocument> <w:View>Normal</w:View> <w:Zoom>0</w:Zoom> <w:punctuationKerning/> <w:ValidateAgainstSchemas/> <w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid> <w:IgnoreMixedContent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent> <w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText> <w:Compatibility> <w:BreakWrappedTables/> <w:SnapToGridInCell/> <w:WrapTextWithPunct/> <w:UseAsianBreakRules/> <w:DontGrowAutofit/> </w:Compatibility> <w:BrowserLevel>MicrosoftInternetExplorer4</w:BrowserLevel> </w:WordDocument> </xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:LatentStyles DefLockedState="false" LatentStyleCount="156"> </w:LatentStyles> </xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 10]> <style> /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0in 5.4pt 0in 5.4pt; mso-para-margin:0in; mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:10.0pt; font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-ansi-language:#0400; mso-fareast-language:#0400; mso-bidi-language:#0400;} </style> <![endif]-->And Nice work--thank you for sharing- for me this makes perfect sense though.
    <!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:WordDocument> <w:View>Normal</w:View> <w:Zoom>0</w:Zoom> <w:punctuationKerning/> <w:ValidateAgainstSchemas/> <w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid> <w:IgnoreMixedContent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent> <w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText> <w:Compatibility> <w:BreakWrappedTables/> <w:SnapToGridInCell/> <w:WrapTextWithPunct/> <w:UseAsianBreakRules/> <w:DontGrowAutofit/> </w:Compatibility> <w:BrowserLevel>MicrosoftInternetExplorer4</w:BrowserLevel> </w:WordDocument> </xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:LatentStyles DefLockedState="false" LatentStyleCount="156"> </w:LatentStyles> </xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 10]> <style> /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0in 5.4pt 0in 5.4pt; mso-para-margin:0in; mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:10.0pt; font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-ansi-language:#0400; mso-fareast-language:#0400; mso-bidi-language:#0400;} </style> <![endif]-->
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Sep 10, 2009
  3. msiyer2002

    msiyer2002 New IL'ite

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    I am very new to this site. It is very interesting and lot of knowledge I am getting. Thanks
     
  4. Vasumathy

    Vasumathy Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Hi msiyer2002,
    Welcome to Indus Ladies & to this forum.
    You can find our forum guidelines here....

    Come and share with us the knowledge you have!
    We will be quite happy to read more knowledge share.
     
  5. jdevi1982

    jdevi1982 New IL'ite

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    newly marrried personal Issues

    Hi..I got married 3 mnths Back..and ours was a love marriage..i knew him for 4 yrs...i m facing a v personal issue...i am not v comfrtable during intercourse..i have read in articles that its a v nice feeling..but smehow..i dnt feel it...and...its not smooth...i feel like i have some ..block in vagina...also..frequency is like...once in a week...not sure if this is normal....We were v close before wedding but ..never got too physical....
    Also...it lasts for 10-15 mins...he immediately ejaculates...I live n the US..and its a big pain to get appointments and even if we go..thye jus say ...some basic advise..like relax urself...share it with ur husband..and all those BS..!!!

    he also doesnt seem to show much interest....worried..if ..once a week..s normal..and its time to consult a doctor...sometimes it gets v frustrating.....bet wee n us ..we dnt have any issues.or problems...we liked each other and got married......i dnt take pills..so we have always tried using only condom...we havent tried without it..may be ...that is the reason....??
     
    GlobetrotterG likes this.
  6. mlk2009

    mlk2009 Bronze IL'ite

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    Re: newly marrried personal Issues

    hi
    Please dont get tensed. I am thinking your hymen is not broken yet and thats why you are feeling like something is blocking. Hymen is a thin layer of skin that covers the entrance of the vagina and during intercourse its ruptured (which usually causes pain and a little bleeding for most of the woman) and once its ruptured and healed and the vagina is opened, then everything will become simple and smooth.

    Having it once a week for newly married is not that uncommon. So please try to use effective lubricant and make sure the hymen is broken and the passage is clear for further lovemaking. thats very important.

    I am thinking that your DH is dissuaded by the fact that he cannot enter smoothly and successfully, so explain to him about female anatomy and guide him through your body and tell him to explore slowly. Getting anxious and frustrated is not going to help. Please google some info and talk about your fears to your husband and sail through together. I am sure in a few days you guys will be ok..



    Goodluck.
     
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  7. Nandshyam

    Nandshyam IL Hall of Fame

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    Re: newly marrried personal Issues

    Welcome to IL.. Nothing to worry :) ..

    Check this out: http://www.indusladies.com/forums/f...1-newly-married-questions-about-intimacy.html

    Just got to have some more foreplay ;-)

    I guess since it's not comfortable may be he is thinking not to trouble you? Newly married and once a week is not normal and also not ABnormal :) so dont stress out. Just enjoy the moment. Initiate sex if need be and play along. Guide him. Since you say he ejaculates immediately and I am assuming you are not planning for family yet, I would suggest to try it out with condom, a good lubricated one. Or, Condom can be a reason too. May be irritating to your skin. So you got to check that out as well.

    Good luck and have fun !!
     
    Last edited: Oct 20, 2009
  8. soumya234

    soumya234 Platinum IL'ite

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    Re: newly marrried personal Issues

    I too faced this discomfort/irritation for a few months.I would suggest using generous amount of lubricant.It helped me a lot.Good Luck.
     
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  9. umasridharan

    umasridharan Senior IL'ite

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    Re: newly marrried personal Issues

    Dear Devi
    First of all relax, Your hymen may be still intact.
    do not force things. Take time for foreplay. Be happy. 3 months is too short a period.
    Uma
     
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  10. Serenity_John

    Serenity_John Bronze IL'ite

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    Re: newly marrried personal Issues

    The others are true in their words.

    The doctors, etc say "relax" for a reason. If you are not relaxed enough, then it feels a bit rough and painful initially at least. Also, these are the time you should explore each other's bodies and get comfortable. By explore, get to know each other's anatomy too as I'm sure there are many assumptions you have abt his and vice versa. So, talk it out and feel comfortable.

    As for foreplay, make sure it last long time (like 1/2 hr to hours) because this will help him get control over the time too before he comes. The process won't happen overnight, but it will still help. If you need some ideas about foreplay, why don't you two browse some online helpful sites like seasonsindia.com which has after marriage section that's really helpful. Try to browse together so that it initiates topics and gets you two talking. I'm sure you will be surprised about how much you two learn about each other.

    You can also try watching romantic movies or games.

    good luck!
     
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