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Never Heard Creation Explained Thus!

Discussion in 'Interesting Shares' started by Cheeniya, Nov 3, 2022.

  1. Cheeniya

    Cheeniya Super Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    In the beginning, God created the Heavens and the Earth and populated the Earth with broccoli, cauliflower and spinach, green and yellow, and
    red vegetables of all kinds, so Man and Woman would live long and healthy lives.

    Then using God's great gifts, Satan created Ben and Jerry's Ice Cream and Krispy Creme Donuts. And Satan said, "You want chocolate with that ?" And Man said, "Yes !" and Woman said, "and as long as you're at it, add some sprinkles." And they gained 10 pounds. And Satan smiled.

    And God created the healthful yogurt that Woman might keep the figure that Man found so fair.
    And Satan brought forth white flour from the wheat, and sugar from the cane and combined them. And Woman went from size 6 to size 14.

    So God said, "Try my fresh green salad."

    And Satan presented Thousand-Island Dressing, buttery croutons and garlic toast on the side.
    And Man and Woman unfastened their belts following the feast!!!

    God then said, "I have sent you heart healthy vegetables and olive oil in which to cook them."

    And Satan brought forth deep fried fish and chicken-fried steak so big it needed its own platter. And Man gained more weight and his cholesterol went through the roof.

    God then created a light, fluffy white cake, named it "Angel Food Cake," and said, "It is good."

    Satan then created chocolate cake and named it
    "Devil's Food."

    God then brought forth running shoes so that His children might lose those extra pounds.

    And Satan gave cable TV with a remote control so Man would not have to toil changing the channels. And Man and Woman laughed and cried before the flickering blue light and gained pounds.

    Then God brought forth the potato, naturally low in fat and brimming with nutrition.

    And Satan peeled off the healthful skin and sliced the
    starchy center into chips and deep-fried them. And Man gained pounds.

    God then gave salad leaves and cucumber and tomatoes, so that Man might consume fewer calories and still satisfy his appetite.

    And Satan created McDonald's and its 99-cent double cheeseburger. Then said, "You want fries with that ?" And Man replied, "Yes ! And super size them !" And Satan said, "It is good." And Man went into cardiac arrest.

    God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery.

    Then Satan created private medical insurance !!!
     
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  2. Thyagarajan

    Thyagarajan IL Hall of Fame

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    A super share alternating the food design between the Almighty & the Monster Satan.
    But then the basic question is how God & Satan Sourced the raw material for such robust and sic foods?
    It is like asking how for the first time karma began with first creation which had no previous karma .
    Regards.
    God Bless us all.
     
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  3. Cheeniya

    Cheeniya Super Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    This is one of the million questions I have about the Karma theory:blush:
     
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  4. swarnamary

    swarnamary Gold IL'ite

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    cant stop admitting myself that as i read this i am tempted to eat more of satan created :neutral::unamused:.. what to do...

    this is so so funny... need to make my son read this :roflmao::roflmao:
     
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  5. Thyagarajan

    Thyagarajan IL Hall of Fame

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    Satan created are not going to cause severe problems of concern. Your young son can enjoy both sumptuously. Only 40+ a d above go for veggie raw as created by Almighty . Make it bland.
    God save our heart, kidney, knee, bladder and the bones.
     
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  6. swarnamary

    swarnamary Gold IL'ite

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    :thumbsup::thumbup:
     
  7. Thyagarajan

    Thyagarajan IL Hall of Fame

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    it is a simple truth yet you are delighted with my version of it.
    Thanks for the emojis.
    Regards. God Bless.
     

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