Need suggestions for family planning

Re: is not having sex common in marriage

Miss P, I want you to know this... you are not alone. It happens more commonly than people realise. First of all, pregnancy and post partum hormonal changes are phenomenal, it kills your sex drive. A lot of women do complain of zero desire for the first year after they have a child.
What happens in most cases is people around the new mother do not understand what is happening with her and a husband who is ill-informed can completely get it wrong.
Not sure what the case is with you, but what strikes me is what you said about having drifted apart even before childbirth. It looks to me there are other issues in the marriage, unrelated to child birth. Talk to your husband, without blame, about why you have drifted apart. You may need to seek the help of a counsellor to understand how to deal with the situation.
A sexologist in Chennai published a paper recently about the sex lives of the double income families. I wrote of this for a newspaper and it eye-opener. The stress of living the modern day life just kills desire and leaves no time for the couple. When the child comes, the hapless one is given preference. So, trust me, it does happen.
While having an affair is an easy way out of the sticky position you find yourself, it wont help build the relationship and the family you are raising. Hang in there, work on your relationship. I seriously think you need to work on what's happening outside the bedroom before thinking about what you need to do in your bed. Hugs. IT is really tough for a few years immediately after the birth of a child. Sending good vibes your way.

 

Birth Control

Hi Ladies,

I need some info about this topic.. When I went for my GYN visit doctor told me to resume all my normal activities including 'IC' and when I asked her about birth control pills she said NO since am bf ing my Rithik..

I did not get my periods yet and I was told that I may not even get until I stop bf ing or not until a year also.. I need to know how to prevent getting preg now..

My Dh is a person who never likes male condoms..(though he has tried using that but hated it so I could not force him due to his personal choice).. Female condoms - I have not tried and I have no idea & planning not to take new risk on it.. Coz, already my vagina is too dry.. Not to worsen it any more by trying out those

Doctor told me that I may not even ovulate now but asked us to be cautious during IC to be on safer side.. I dont know about my next periods
also.. Very much confused.. We are planning for 2kids but I dont want 2nd kid right away.. But if I get preg now also my DH will be more happy since he is a kid liker :rotfl

Any ideas are very much appreciated ladies

 

Re: Birth Control

Anitha,

How open you are???choo cweet....In india we have something called Copper T, which people usually prefer.
But i feel that BF is not related to your periods and next preg...because my SIL got her periods on her 40th day when she was BF.
Also for Preg, soon after a couple of months when my aunt delivered her first daughter, she got pregnant for the second. So i am sure BF is not related to these.

I think other experienced mom's can help you.

 

Re: Birth Control

you should be 'safe' as long as your periods don't show up. mine showed up 6 months after my delivery. if you don't want to use birth control, some options are as follows

1. you can order the ovulation prediction sticks from early-pregnancy.com website. it tells you whether or not you will be ovulating soon. but this will be a pain and expensive in my opinion.

2. the other option is to monitor your fertility signs eg morning temperature, cervical mucus etc. check out the website www.tcoyf.com on how to do this.

3. immediately after IC, wash privates well with a vinegar and water solution.

I don't see the relation between bf'ing and birth control. there are no adverse effects that I know of. you can always use the IUD or the patch instead of pills. or if you want to use condoms, try using it with a lubricant.

 

Re: Birth Control

Hi Anitha,

Even i have not heard of a relation to birth control and breast feeding... Last week i remember discussing it with my friends here and one of them said she has been using Nuva ring... That is a Vaginal Ring that you change every week.. Not sure about more details.. You can always go to their website

NuvaRing®: once a month birth control, effective contraception for women

Do consult with your doctor about the other options too... In their website however they say you should not be using if you recently had a baby... am not sure how many days they are referring to by "recently"!!!

 

Re: Birth Control

Anitha, I use Mirena IUV based on my OB/GYNs reco (its been over 5 yrs now). They have a 5 yr and a 10 yrs. I chose 5 yrs and I'm supposed to change it every 5 years. Here's some detail about the same. Try to ask your GYN about it when you visit her next time.

What Is Mirena®? Mirena (levonorgestrel-releasing intrauterine system) is an intrauterine contraceptive that delivers small amounts of hormone directly to the uterus. Made of soft, flexible plastic, it is put in place by your healthcare provider during an office visit. Mirena is birth control that lasts as long as you want, for up to 5 years. Mirena works continuously, without a pill, without a daily hassle. Once Mirena is properly placed, all you have to do is check the threads once a month. Your healthcare provider can show you how. If you have trouble finding the threads, be sure to use a backup form of birth control and call your healthcare provider.
What Mirena does:

• Offers an over 99% effective form of contraception, among the most efficacious forms of birth control
• Prevents pregnancy for as long as you want, for up to 5 years
• When removed by your healthcare provider, you can to try to become pregnant immediately*
• Keeps hormone levels steadier and lower than the pill

When Mirena should be placed:
Mirena should be placed within 7 days of the start of your period. When properly placed, Mirena prevents pregnancy for as long as you want for up to 5 years.

 

Re: Birth Control

There are pills available that can be used with nursing called "mini pills" or Progestin-only pills. Talk to your ob-gyn about it.

 

Re: Birth Control

You might try a vaginal diaphragm (which is NOT a vaginal condom). Since you are dry already you would have added benefit with this method and there is no risk of problems from any hormonal based birth controls (frankly I am shocked that docs are prescribing them for breastfeeding moms.....). It is easy and safe to use but you need a fitting by the doctor. Your husband should not be able to feel it if you put it in right.

Here is a link to info:

Diaphragm

 

Re: Birth Control

I was thinking to post this a month back and just thought what's wrong in asking exp ladies about this coz this info may be useful for other ladies too na who is shy to post this.. am so happy to see many ideas pouring around here :thumbsup