Need advice and suggestion

Lakshu, good and bad are embedded in the world, a good woman will always have this question , are there good men? and good men will always have this question too, are there any good women in this world? . its just where we belong, because we get bad, we think everything is bad, of course good is in minority, how to find it a big question, and whether we will get it or not is another, call it karma, I believe in that, because there is some big power which directs things, as we see how events happen in this world, out of no where we meet someone, come close, marry and then divorce. all this is cycyle of karma. moreover I believe one thing, what Buddha said, whatever gives happiness, or whatever we look at for happiness and enjoyment, that thing itself brings sorrow, whether its human, money, personal possession when lost. So we have to accept that when we are wanting happiness, sorrow is also coming along in disguised form. No one can stay married, and happy all the time, there are people who have no problems, everything is ok in their married life, you ask them are they happy, the answer would be no in many cases. No one knows what makes human happy perpetually, there is no content in this world.

Your past is bad and so you are worried, rightly so, and for a woman who feels her brothers, parents are really going to help if she is alone without husband are mostly mistaken, brothers live their life with their wives, and their wives dont like sisters interference.

I have a friend here in US, his sister is getting divorced after 2 years of marriage, she was dependent, her husband threw her out on street , when she came to her brothers place, she lived for 7 months, her brothers wife was not bad but was also not making her feel comfortable, she was cold in her behavior, very less talk, and show as if she is not happy her being around... the guy started developing rifts in his family life because of that, he felt why is his wife not helping him to help his sister in dire consequences, that is how world is..

When you see someone is asking you to marry him and as you said he is from 5 months trying, that may be a two way sign, good and bad too, you have to see how much intense he is in pursual, does he say things which look balanced, dont go by word of mouth he says he will treat you well and all, why does he even need to say that, it is upto you to judge by his behavior, actions, past etc.

Always take time to decide ..

 

Dear Lakshu,
Its a good thing that life has given you a 2nd chance.Tread with caution.Have you met this guy?

Do you really like him? Not compromise but like....if you do then don't look back.

Do your due diligence in screening him.Check his background.If he is from another town then have a detective agency dig up everything.

About your daughter....Bring them up as confident,educated and independant. If someone does not want to marry them because of caste..do U want them to be married to such individuals?

Take care of your life and the rest will follow.

JMO.

Good Luck
FL

 

Good one, I think something like security clearance in US? Detective should find out about his habits, also try to enter in a fight with him to see his attitude, anger, termperament, abuses, whether the detective is bashed or asked forgiveness, or/and send a undercover woman detective, to seduce and see if he will be honest or flirting, all this will give a good idea. Karamchand can be rehired.

 

Hi Lakshu,
I know an Indian widowed woman with 2 daughters married to a previously unmarried person. This man is actually very good and he has raised the daughters as his own, paid for their weddings etc. There are good and bad people in the world. You mentioned your younger brother is an inspector. Can he check on this alliance to see if he has any past record and his general reputation in the community? That should give you a better idea.

Good luck.

 

Dear Tridev,
I found out that in India..when people are marrying daughters ..they do so.
I have no clue about it but I have 3 close associates who said that it was done in their case...just to check if the boys side is telling the truth.

Hey, if this is available and one cannot have a live in relationship then I say go for it...:thumbsup

FL