Narcissist Person ' Wife

your children are not dependent on you. you are financially not dependent. you are not physically controlled. then what stops you from doing things which you want to if you were alone right now. it could be anything. and it is a completely personal thing, which you can or do not even have to document or share.

last q, are you physically ok. means you can walk eat cleanup and communicate without help.

also. i am aware of the damages done by narcs. which is your statement lost everthing, cannot be ignored. but you should try to proceed something small and build up on what you want to do ahead.

 

While empathise with your present status, I am left to wonder how you could remain in a WEDLOCK for over 3 decades! It shows her strength or weakness or endurance or resilience!

From medical chronicles, I find it is well nigh difficult to make a Narcissistic person to change over dramatically but it may only be possible over years to make him realise his behaviour is bad for family life.

If he has no other secret partner in his life, there is still some scope to make him turn over a new leaf.

Dealing with a narcissistic partner can be emotionally draining. Given the 35-year history, it's essential to focus on your well-being and explore ways to improve your relationship dynamics.

Here are some potential remedies and considerations:
Therapy Options for Your Partner:
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT):This Helps you recognize and change negative thought patterns, potentially improving hubby's behaviour and interactions with others.
Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT): Here Focus is on emotional regulation, mindfulness, and effective communication, which can benefit him.
Schema Therapy: Combines elements of CBT, psychodynamic therapy, and mindfulness to address deep-seated patterns and behaviours.
Transference-Focused Psychotherapy (TFP): Examines the therapeutic relationship to understand and change maladaptive patterns .
Personal Support and Growth:
Individual Therapy:Focus on your emotional well-being, develop coping strategies, and work through feelings of loneliness and isolation.

Support Groups: Join groups for partners of individuals with narcissistic personality disorder to connect with others who share similar experiences.

Self-Care: Prioritize activities that bring you joy, practice mindfulness, and engage in self-compassion.

Relationship Dynamics:
Couples Therapy: If your partner is willing, joint therapy can help you both communicate more effectively and work through relationship issues.

Boundary Setting: Establish clear boundaries and expectations for your relationship, and communicate them assertively.

Emotional Detachment: Consider detaching emotionally to protect yourself from further harm, while still maintaining a relationship.

Can he be Changed?
While it's difficult yet possible for individuals with narcissistic personality disorder to change, it requires significant effort from you and your commitment to task with professional guidance. Change is a gradual process that involves developing self-awareness, empathy, and more adaptive coping mechanisms.

Ultimately, your well-being and safety are crucial. Consider seeking support from loved ones, therapists, or support groups to navigate this challenging situation.
Regards.
God Bless

 

@cavani @chanchitra
It is heartening to note you had re-visited here and awarded like to my FB.
Regards.
God Bless

 

oh relax dear. this is not you or your fault. that is one amazing personality of narcs. they are great in confusing people for a very long time where the victims keep second guessing themselves.

the thing to gain , they are extremely self focused. i have some in my extended family. i sometimes do feel jealous also.