My Husband Says That I Have To Make Something Special On Weekends Especially On Sunday!

Discussion in 'Recipe Central' started by indubalram, Dec 19, 2021.

  1. ProudIndian

    ProudIndian Gold IL'ite

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    Go out to eat on weekends and relax. If possible prep work for weekdays.
     
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  2. Sreevidyaa

    Sreevidyaa Silver IL'ite

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    So many suggestions but why can’t he cook on Sundays as he likes and you can take rest. I hate to say but he seems unfair to expect specials every weekend. Home is not a hotel and I don’t cook anything special on weekends. Whenever I feel to make specials the family has to accept otherwise it’s their choice and let them cook to their hearts desire. It’s my weekend off as well and I have to take rest rather than slog it off at home. It’s my balanced lifestyle I have chosen. If I cook without any happiness involved what kind of special food would it be? Isn’t it better to have curd rice with love and affection in it? Just saying. Anyhow wish you good with your weekend specials.
     
    Last edited: Jan 20, 2022
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  3. indubalram

    indubalram IL Hall of Fame

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    What he feels is that his work is v stressful and very hard and so when it comes to weekends he says he needs to be treated v special Bc he deserves! Where my work is very easy. Stress free work. My company pays me free! So I don’t deserve anything! Just serve me on weekends! ! This is how he feels!
     
  4. shravs3

    shravs3 IL Hall of Fame

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    Ask him to help since both of you are working! Don’t you deserve some free time?
     
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  5. lavani

    lavani Gold IL'ite

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    OP i am sorry i might differ from others .

    I have seen your past threads too, you seem to be always in an unsatisfied mode of relationship, something which couples in early years of relationship go through. But i see your kid is married. So it seems like you have been married for more than 20 years. It is quite senior relationship where things get way lot matured.

    what are you looking for from IL asking similar questions just in different ways. it will never solve . Either you serve or you do not . there is no middle ground after so many years.

    I am not trying to show off something special. i do all these , making special every week or at least 2 times a month , i serve my dh. this is not expecting anything special from my dh. he is also busy with kids classes, house work .
    i remember as a memory when my mom used to make special stuff, my kids tell that and i feel good.

    i am not trying to change anything , but i notice you are in or you have in stress for a long time. you might want to consult individual therapist , online forums will not help .

    we all remember when it rains, mom will make pakoras and now when it is our turn, we complain.
     
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  6. indubalram

    indubalram IL Hall of Fame

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    I’m just trying to vent so I get out of my stress. If you do not like me vent then you don’t have to read my thread. I’m sorry for saying this to you Bc you are adding stress to me. I understand that my daughter is married! And my previous thread what I posted! It’s all my vent Bc I have no options other than venting!
     
  7. lavani

    lavani Gold IL'ite

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    I apologize.
     
  8. indubalram

    indubalram IL Hall of Fame

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    You should be v lucky to have a life like yours where you feel happy and excited to serve your husband and kids. God bless you!
     
  9. Sreevidyaa

    Sreevidyaa Silver IL'ite

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    It’s called entitlement. If he entitled so are you. Does he do chores and cooking on weekdays and weekends? If so he can then except certain days for specials but at your choice and freedom. Not just because he is working hard and earning more. Just because you earn less or let’s say you weren’t earning at all means you have to cook specials every weekend. The husband is earning for the family not for special treatment. It’s because of your help on making the home front stable that he is able to focus on his career. You and many other females I have known have made sacrifices by pushing their career on the back burner to help husband focus on their career. That doesn’t mean they have to slog all day long in their home and also at whatever career job they are doing. Just because you are earning less, I am sure your employer is not going to lessen your hours of work or that you aren’t stressed at jobs. Every job either low paying or high paying comes with their own packages of stresses. Some complain and some don’t. He needs to understand that he is earning because of you as well and take your feelings into consideration. Entitlement works for both.
     
  10. indubalram

    indubalram IL Hall of Fame

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    And in my case I don’t take single pie from him. I maintain my expenses from my income! My own surgery I paid from my hsa and insurance!He is earning for his own pocket and to satisfy his ego. He did not care for his parents! He did not care for his daughter!
     

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