My Hubby younger than me

Kamla · Sep 12, 2007

Re: My Hubby younger than I

Sravanthi28 said: ↑

Hi Kamla & Sunkan,
yeah, its very true that girls mature faster than the boys. They know many things when compared to the boys of their age and evn more. And that the was reason, girls could cope up with their husbands, in-laws, babies & other responsibilites even if they were married at a very tender age. (We should also consider the point that most of the girls were illterate in those days).
My husband being the only child & that too born after 11 years of marriage of my in-laws, he was too pampered (to such an extent , you can say a spoil-brat). Love, marriage and honeymoon period were like a bed of roses. Only when we started staying together, the reality came out very slowly. He was a stuborn, short tempered and a spendthrift. It took 2 years for me to get him into line and now , he is very much a changed guy. Everybody could see the change in him (including his parents) and he is now a responsible guy.
Everybody who expressed their views here ,well said! Thanks a lot. Age is only a number and a marriage can flourish only if the persons invloved are compatible with each other.

Sravanthi
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Atta girl Sravanthi! Good for you! All the same, you did have a good portion of luck too...because, normally, you get what you marry!!! Another point I want to make here is, whether everyone agrees or not, that you changed your husband for better has got less to do with you being older and more to do with the love you both have for each other. I am convinced!

L, Kamla

coolcool · Sep 20, 2007

Hi, You are lucky!. Wish you all best in your future!
One of my dearmost friend loved a guy 3 months younger than her. They know it before they fall in love but they thought just 3 months won't be a big difference. In the beginning, that guy was also showing all the examples as everyone says. So, she had lots of hope and they lived for few months without their knowledge of their parents. When they started thinking of marriage, they told both of their parents about their love (not their relationship they had). Girls side was said ok, because girl was so strongly said she will marry that guy otherwise she will die.
But, the guys side, his sisters, brothers (they are highly educated and settled in USA) and parents all opposed and somehow(don't want to bore you guys by saying their nonsense behaviour) they stopped the guy to marry her.
She tried for suicide but her parents saved her and then she decided NOT to die because of a stupid, culprit, coward guy.
Now she is married to another guy, her husband is good hearted and treating his wife (myfriend) like a "Queen". She can live that life happily but, she couldn't forget the past, and always has a guilty feeling.
Since I am her best friend, she used to share with me whenever she feels more depressed.
Forgot to say, that guy married to another girl with his parents blessing and living happily in Europe.
Sometimes, I am getting a doubt whether God is there.

Sravanthi28 said: ↑

Hi everybody,
For your views & experiences. I am older than my husband by 10 months. Though both of our families & close friends knew about it, we never intentionally disclose it to anybody. These days its a common thing among celebrities in india (forgot about hollywood, age never matters to them and the west). But people are usually struck for a second when we tell them about our reverse age gap.
Actually it all started when my husband (then lover) wanted to know my date of birth (concisely the year). One day after our classes were over, he gave me a slam book & asked me to fill it. I was rather surprised becoz we were in the middle of our academic year & no way theres need of a slam book between us (we know well we will be in touch forever). I grasped that he want to know some of my favourites , filled the whole page but just filled the month & date of my birthday. Next day, when i handed him the book, he immediately grabbed it & looked for my birth date. He somewhat shly asked me to fill the year too (besides mentioning that he was born on 16 th november 1981). Then the thought came into my mind, but i couldn't tell him spontaneously that i was born on 28th january 1981 becoz a common friend was present there. The next day i callded him up & told him that our relationship wont work as i am older than him. He said it doesn't matter to him & persuaded me to meet him for the last time. We met in a bakery & he told all such examples of Sachin Tendulkar (people usually remember this couple), Socrates, Lord Rama and Adolf Hitler. I too love him a lot & i just couldn't loose him and so got convinced after much discussion. I too have heard such cases happen even with arranged marriages. One such case was my north indian friend's grand parents. They were not aware that before and it came into light after many years of their marriage.

We didnot conceal this from our parents and luckily both of our parents agreed to our marriage(inter-caste) . May be i am boring:bangcomp: people here with my story, i want to know how many women here belong to the same category as i.

Sravanthi
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Anirajiv · Sep 20, 2007

Dear Sravanthi, Cool Cool,

This world is made up of all kinds of people!!:-(

But you know what, my hubby is 9.5 years younger than me. Sounds filmy
isn't it?! We have been happily married for the last 8 years. After a initial
hesistation both our parents agreed.
Yes, people still are suprised, when we disclose our age, but now they have
gotten used to it.
I think it a matter of conviction and meeting of the minds, age does not
mean anything.
Cool Cool,
There is a saying: " Whatever happens, happens for the best!!
and if a person is so swayed in the wrong direction by his family,
he is not worth it at all!
Your friend is actually very lucky, in case she had married such a
person, she would have been very unhappy.
God has actually protected her!!

Warm Regards
Anita

Sravanthi28 · Sep 21, 2007

Hi coolcool,
Your friend is very lucky enough to have passed that torment state & settled in a happy married life. As Anitha said, " Whatever happens, happens for the best!!". One of my friends too experienced such a bad phase in her life when that guy had excused himself pointing some silly reasons.
Now she is engaged to a very good boy (who knows everything about her past) and ready to get married this november. we are all very thankful to God as he had choosen her the right path.

Hi Anitha,
Great yaar! I actually posted this with the thought that people similar to me would open up & share their stories. But this is the first reply i hve come across. Nice to hear from you. And about the friend i mentioned above, now the guy who is her fiance is 2 years younger to her. I guess that's the reason they say "Marriages are made in heaven".

Sravanthi

Sravanthi

tyciol · Sep 22, 2007

I think it's wonderful that you got over that cultural limitation, I think if it's fine for men to date younger women it should also be fine the other way around. You met together, you are like peers and equals in education.

Cookie · Sep 24, 2007

Hello Dear,

In marriage what matters is a deep understanding between partners. What has age got to do with it . A ten month gap is nothing. I know of a friend who is 7 years younger to her hubby, and ofcourse in the west you have these hollywood couples who are 20 to even 40 years older than their husbands. But ofcourse too much of an age gap is conventionally not viable Our Indian writer Amrita Pritam too was living with a much younger man. What matters is the maturity level of the two people . Husbands being much older than the wives act like helpless babies most of the time. Times are changing and peoples mindsets too.

So dont you worry girl. No one is pointing fingers at you. You llive your lilfe only once. You are not hurting anybody. You have married for love. Wishing you many wonderful years of love and a life full of happiness and good luck.

One advice. Never get into unneccesary arguments. If your partner is angry or upset over something buy time. Say you are or I am very upset or angry now we will talk about this later. Resolve the matter when both of you are calm enough to see reason.
Love Cookie

Sravanthi28 · Sep 24, 2007

Hi Cookie,
Thanks a lot yaar for your wishes. And , you have got a good nick "Cookie".

Sravanthi

Reenae · Sep 24, 2007

Agar Mujhe Na Mile Tum Tou Mai Yeh Samjhungi
Ke Sirf Umar Katti Zindagi Nahin Guzri.....

Kamalji · Oct 2, 2007

I liked Sir's reply.

It is not much of a difference,as long as u are happy.Isnt Sachim happy.So just forget it, and be happy withj hubby.Regards.kamal

Priya_Mommy · Sep 11, 2008

NO issues,
it happened to one of my friends also, who is almost 3 months elder to her hubby. They are sharing a very good relationship and married life.