Dear OP Don't feel bad about the slang word you used in this forum, mainly as a matter of venting out of your frustration. I understand from your post that you never used such words to your MIL directly or indirectly before. So, what is the point of sticking to this word why we have a problem here to analyze. Your problem is that you are adjusting too much for "something" with your MIL. Perhaps, you are adjusting to get her recognition, appreciation, to be in her good books or to win your husband's heart literally. Perhaps, this is how you were taught since childhood. Your thinking that everyone hates MILs is not right. And specially everything a MIL does doesn't make her DIL unhappy. So, it is a personal issue between a DIL and MIL. Not always universal. In your case, you are compromising on your partying. Stretching too hard to cook so much. And getting no appreciation or help in return. So you must be fed-up now. If I were you, I would cook somewhat special meals during MIL's stay with me, big batches, extra items from restaurant and also offer her to cook her special items too. This way, there would be lot of foods. Before partying, I would do some extra cooking and make her meal time comfortable when I get out of the house for party. What if she doesn't like to party, I would go and enjoy it my way. But obviously, I would invite her to join me if she wishes. If the control and demand is so much, I would speak to my husband and set things straight. If my husband blindly supports MIL without listening to my concerns, then I would use whatever the slang to yell at my husband, not the MIL.