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Morning Hustle And Bp

Discussion in 'Miscellaneous in Parenting' started by sanjuruby3, May 24, 2022.

  1. sanjuruby3

    sanjuruby3 Platinum IL'ite

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    Hi,
    I do not know if it is just my house or same case everywhere...
    I do remember while growing up my parents house had same situation with mom working. So much of yelling and noise chaos ..
    Here we are just 4 and 2 of us work from home. Little kid is toddler so still stays at home most of the time so no rush for him to get ready/school or most times he wakes up late.

    My family sleeps late, not before 11 ( I know... but i can not fix it as other significant will not).

    1. Morning - I get up and rush to pack older ones lunchbox/snack/water etc
    2. Meanwhile both me and H yelling at her to wake up/etc eat breakfast, eat ,eat ,eat...
    3. THen in b/w i pack stuff into her bag while yelling to eat and getting her all ready and also fighting her - about clothes she does not want to wear or wear or like or not like
    ( I take out her clothes one night before - she does not do anything inspite of me trying a lot, and then morning she decides she wants to wear strappy short top on cold day) then H comes tries to help to dress her her up, he starts yelling, where is this, this is ugly dress, it is synthetic, it does not have cotton lining etc
    )
    Then he dresses her up in joker style ( she is fine with that) - will put fully sleeve mismatching big size tshirt and dress on top.... if i say 'no' again fight
    None of them actually buys/washes/folds/takes out clothes to put on her.

    4. then she is eating/thinking like sloth...meanwhile bus is near. I rush to find shoes and get her our of door.
    And she keeps blaming me, because of me this that happened.

    5. THen its office login time but my little one's turn to pack snack/ etc.. I feel so tired by that time, that do not have energy to feed him or pack his food or do not remember anything snack options.

    My BP has risen to sky high and takes 30 mins to get it down but little one has woken up, his maintenance time , bkast etc ( then if it is his daycare day, get him ready , brush etc)

    Yes my H helps. He cooks breakfast and drops her ..he recently started after seeing our friend, otherwise, earlier everything was on me. He was just screaming cow.


    Then even she comes by 4, again same story - her snack etc, her classes, screaming at her to get ready while she is busy with Tv, also managing little one
     
    globalcitizen and Thyagarajan like this.
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  2. MalStrom

    MalStrom IL Hall of Fame

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    How many hours of sleep is your daughter getting?
     
  3. Thyagarajan

    Thyagarajan IL Hall of Fame

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    The unasked question seems to be as to how to organise that morning rush hours so that
    Systolic and Diastolic Blood Pressure
    Doesn’t go outside the acceptable normal range .
    Suggest Consult @hrastro .
    Regards.
     
    hrastro likes this.
  4. sanjuruby3

    sanjuruby3 Platinum IL'ite

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    She sleeps 8 hrs. She sleeps v late like 11am(sometimes even late) and has to wake up by 7:30.
    She falls asleep quickly once down and lights off... but that moment comes v late. Unless everyone is back to their beds, kids do not feel they need to sleep.
    My H does the dishes then enjoys his lone time..all that takes time, while i bear kids wrath upstairs, then i get all screaming again because i also want them off my back...
    so my morning starts with yelling ends with yelling.:anguished:
    Inspite of doing everything at home, i get to hear i did not do that... because i did not do that, or because u did that, its your fault...
    Atleast my H has come down with his blamings but not much.
     
  5. kavikuyil

    kavikuyil Bronze IL'ite

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    You all need sleep and some organization.

    If u are the one putting kids to sleep at night, start at 8:30 pm.. take kids to bed, close door switch off light and start telling stories…8 hrs sleep for school kid and toddler is very less for those brains to develop well. They need at least 10 hrs.

    Have a simple evng routine and pick clothes at night time for kids and pack their school bag and dry snack. Keep lunch boxes clean and ready. Plan for next day meals - just think of what U will eat for breakfast lunch and dinner next day.. soak beans if you need to. Take kids to playground in the evng and exhaust them so they fall asleep soon. Eat dinner early. Dinner doesn’t have to be elaborate ..
     
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  6. MalStrom

    MalStrom IL Hall of Fame

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    If your daughter will eat at school then let her do that. One less work for you until you get a routine into place.
    You absolutely have to move the bedtime earlier. Tired kids are cranky kids. Do as much as possible the previous night: bath, bag packed, clothes and shoes laid out. My SIL offers 2 clothing options every day but not more. Her kid knows she has to pick one or she loses screen time in the evening.
    You can offer a rewards system if she gets ready in time: a favorite snack, a few minutes of playing with a favorite toy, basically whatever will motivate her.
     
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  7. blindpup10

    blindpup10 Platinum IL'ite

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    The only problem that I see is kids not going to bed early.
    Not eating, yelling, waking up, dressing up will get better when the child is well rested. Try to get her to bed by 8:00. You will see the change.

    I pack my kids lunch, water bottle, pick out the uniform, socks at night. Right after bath my kid is in bed by 8:30pm. No television on weekdays.
     
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  8. hrastro

    hrastro Platinum IL'ite

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    Thanx @Thyagarajan ji for the mention

    I used to reward my son with a story reading time early mornings if he finished getting ready quickly - on many days he would get 15 mins reading time before leaving for school - and he would be thrilled with that.. offer her some instant rewards when she gets ready faster.

    If she is old enough to go to school (or play school) she is old enough to fill water bottles and prepare her bag and set aside clothes the NIGHT BEFORE - get her to finalize her dress the night before, if it is her decision, she will be less inclined to change it in the morning.

    Here are some of my threads on getting organized

    Productivity
    How do YOU keep your kitchen always ready ?
    Morning multitasking - whole day's cooking
    What can You Make in 10 Minutes from Your Kitchen Right Now for Kids?
     
  9. Thyagarajan

    Thyagarajan IL Hall of Fame

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    Happy I am that you hv responded in good time and trust OP would get some hacks out of it and apply in her routine and enjoy well organised morning & normal BP.
    REGARDS.
     
  10. KashmirFlower

    KashmirFlower IL Hall of Fame

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    1. Make the kid responsible for her actions and let her face the consequences.

    2. One parent at a time, attend the kid. If your husband makes her ready in the morning you don't involve. If she misses the bus let your H drive to school. In the evening you take her to classes, that way kid can get better instructions and she can't blame you at the end as all because of you.

    3. When you are not busy spend good time with her.

    4. If you yelling, they don't listen. Instead train her to listen, when talked in normal voice.

    5. Make her walk by her-self to bus stop also, if her school allows for that age.
    ================================
    For ex, my kid got late and missed the school bus so I took him to the next stop which is just 100 feet away. The driver told the kid that, next time he won't allow this and he has to get-in in his bus-stop. This happened twice.
    Next few days my kid asked me if we are late, take me school in car, I said no, I have to join office call.

    So he has no choice except be on time in his bus stop. He checks clock and tries to get ready.

    His school allows for 3rd graders, to walk by themselves to bus-stop with green-pass. It is 2 min walk so I chose that.

    His school offers both breakfast and lunch and he likes to eat there(not healthy though), so I don't pack anything. Saves lot of time.
     

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