Monkeys And Selfies

Kamalji · Sep 15, 2016

Monkeys and Selfies

Students study hard, so that they can enter the hallowed IIT’s, and make a career . Kota city is full of these institutes, which charge u a leg and a arm, to make u ready for the entrance exams.

But they did not teach you of how to deal with monkeys !!! It seems it is not the alarm clock, or the cock, who wakes up the students, but these monkeys, who are staring at the windows, wanting u to open up yr room door, so that they can share your food and biscuits.

IIT Bombay students wake up to monkey menace daily

Well these must be the ex IIT students, who committed suicide in their last birth in the IIT’s, finding the going tough, and now on rebirth have come back to trouble the poor students who want to study. Students have been told to carry a stick with them. If monkeys find a room open, well clothes are torn, the bags raided in search for goodies, and mama’s ladoos she sent lovingly for her son, goes to the simians.

My daughters school here in Jaipur had the same story. A large tree which oversaw her class, a few monkeys would climb up and be seen sitting on the window sill, watching the teacher and students. And my daughter used to sit close to the windows and she used to be very scared. These were quiet monkeys. I used to pacify my daughter, that he may be a past student, who missed studies so now has come to catch up and he attentively listens to yr teacher. And she would laugh, and every day would come and tell me new tales of monkeys. And I told her take a few bananas, for them, which she would quietly feed them.

So u see there are quality of monkeys, and these IIT ones are ruffians. Students will prefer ragging by fellow human students than an encounter with these monkeys eh !

HAHA

AAP Ministers caught with their pants down

You all must have received the pictures of the two AAP ministers with their respective girlfriends. If u look closer, they are seen posing, for selfies.

A forty something minister, and a twenty something babe, who wants to get a ration card made, goes to the minister for his help, well he helps her instead to take off her clothes. And we can see them taking selfies.Now if the minister takes selfie, the girl can say, please forward me the copy.Now the babe has the minister under her thumb.if the pics are exposed, the minister stands to lose more than the lady.

Why must the ministers be taking selfies I wonder. You want to have a good time, do have, do it quietly, what do u want to do with the selfies eh ! Two ministers have been brought down, and I suspect manymore will soon be caught without their undies.

And now we see the other AAP ministers scared and all gone abroad, so that they are not caught in any of these sting operations, that there is not one minister around these days.

So friends the moral of the story is, keep your pants up and mobiles shut, and promise yourselves, no selfies please.

HAHA

KAMAL MAHTANI

A person reported to the police about ''Missing of his neighbour's wife.''

Police : Why are you complaining about his missing wife?

Reply : I can't tolerate that guy's happiness. He is celebrating every day !

Power cuts

are the only time

the whole family assembles together and members speak to each other. ...

as Wi-Fi also remains off...

Seeing this,

Electricity Board has decided to have a tagline called

"Connecting People by Disconnecting Power"!

Powerful message

Beauty is not judged by your clothes or ur appearance. It is judged by your inner beauty .

.So Always Wear Designer Undergarments. !!!!!!!

Men in Suits really look Good and successful

Until u find out that they work

For guys wearing Jeans and T shirts !!!!!!

ashima10 · Sep 15, 2016

As always super post !

Kamalji · Sep 15, 2016

ashima10 said: ↑

As always super post !
Click to expand...

Dear ashima
And always u r the first.thanks
Kamal

mrunalini01 · Sep 15, 2016

Hilarious jokes @Kamalji

Can't stop laughing

jayasala42 · Sep 15, 2016

Dear Kamalji,

Very interesting write up on monkeys.Those who have lived near very big temples know the mischief caused every day by monkeys.Especially in thatched houses,they would jump down and stare at you ,straight away enter the kitchen take away the rice or vegetables. Ghee cup was their favourite one.It is interesting to watch them lick the ghee.They would simply throw the cup in neighbouring houses.

In Sholinghur there is a temple for Maruthi.The temple is on hilltop.You have to climb some 700 steps. There are hundreds of monkeys that snatch not only plantains and eatables but simply snatch away the hand bags and purses.Pilgrims keep everything down in rooms and simply climb the steps empty handed.

I had an unforgettable experience with a monkey some 47 years back

It was 9th June 1969.I was in my native village. My daughter was 22 days old.
She was sleeping in a bamboo cradle in the hall.My parents had gone to the temple. As I was busy in the kitchen I felt the haphazard swinging of the cradle.When I rushed to the hall I saw a big monkey sitting on the rim of the cradle and jumping & rejumping over and over again giving a vertical bumping motion to the cradle.When I went near the cradle and tried to drive away the monkey with vociferous signals, the monkey didn't move. In stead it took away the baby biting the araignan rope( black rope tied around the waist of the baby) with its teeth,with the baby's head and feet hanging on both the sides.Immediately it jumped out of the cradle and started running towards the backyard.
We have almost lived with monkeys and we knew the general behaviour of any monkey and the places they sit.My imagination ran riot.The most favourite place for the monkey used to be the concrete slab on the well, the top of coconut trees or the madhil suvar( compound wall ) of the temples. Since there was nobody at home, I was nervous.The monkey was nearing the well which was just 20 feet away.
Suddenly I got a flash. I remembered the words my mother had spoken on an earlier occasion. " Monkeys think that they are the most beautiful creatures in the world. They would like to see and admire their own form in the mirror'.Without wasting a second I took a big mirror from the shelf and ran towards the monkey, & by some sounds attracted its attention. It was just 2 steps to reach the well. With prayer in my mind, & posing to be brave I just went in front of the monkey and showed the mirror just against its face. Immediately the monkey became too happy or inquisitive and dropped the baby on the mud floor just adjacent to the parapet wall.I just threw the mirror near the monkey in which it seemed to enjoy its beauty.Everything happened within one minute.
I took the baby inside, bolted the doors.It took nearly an hour for me to regain my normal breath.Luckily the child had no problem except a mark of the monkey's teeth. on her waist.As she was just an infant she didn't feel panicky.It was a rebirth to her.

But an information which had been received by me casually helped me in a crisis.Our education, degrees, intelligence or our official position may not be of help on such occasions. Only our commonsense,samayochitabuddhi and swiftness matter a lot.By divine grace we should get strength of my mind to get at the right idea and implement it in right time, right speed and the appropriate manner.

Actually the information was given to me when I was just 8 years old when my mother used to tell about the Ramar Pattabhishekam( coronation of Lord Rama) when the monkeys were decorating Sita for the festival.They decorated themselves also and stood before Sita & told her with pride that they looked more beautiful than Sita herself and that if Rama had seen them earlier he would not have thought of Sita.
Things that look little and insignificant ,assume the greatest importance in our life.
Even today I shudder to think about the incident.IThe monkeys normally throw anything and everything into the well.What if the baby had been thrown into the well? Lord Hanuman only saved her.

Jayasala 42

Viswamitra · Sep 16, 2016

Dear Kamal,

When I saw the heading "Monkeys and Selfies", I thought Monkeys have become state-of-the-art to take selfies of their own. After reading the snippet, I realized that you covered two separate topics.

Those Monkeys found in IIT campus must be intelligent enough to get admission or must have bypassed the entrance test and admission procedures to attend free classes.

Regarding selfies, I don't understand the logic of the Ministers taking selfies when they commit adultery. Don't they use their common sense that their position would be at risk if those selfies were to get out in public domain? If their leader is from IIT, they behave like the Monkeys attending free classes.

Viswa

Kamalji · Sep 16, 2016

mrunalini01 said: ↑

Hilarious jokes @Kamalji

Can't stop laughing
Click to expand...

Thanks .Regards
kamal

Kamalji · Sep 16, 2016

jayasala42 said: ↑

Dear Kamalji,

Very interesting write up on monkeys.Those who have lived near very big temples know the mischief caused every day by monkeys.Especially in thatched houses,they would jump down and stare at you ,straight away enter the kitchen take away the rice or vegetables. Ghee cup was their favourite one.It is interesting to watch them lick the ghee.They would simply throw the cup in neighbouring houses.

In Sholinghur there is a temple for Maruthi.The temple is on hilltop.You have to climb some 700 steps. There are hundreds of monkeys that snatch not only plantains and eatables but simply snatch away the hand bags and purses.Pilgrims keep everything down in rooms and simply climb the steps empty handed.

I had an unforgettable experience with a monkey some 47 years back

It was 9th June 1969.I was in my native village. My daughter was 22 days old.
She was sleeping in a bamboo cradle in the hall.My parents had gone to the temple. As I was busy in the kitchen I felt the haphazard swinging of the cradle.When I rushed to the hall I saw a big monkey sitting on the rim of the cradle and jumping & rejumping over and over again giving a vertical bumping motion to the cradle.When I went near the cradle and tried to drive away the monkey with vociferous signals, the monkey didn't move. In stead it took away the baby biting the araignan rope( black rope tied around the waist of the baby) with its teeth,with the baby's head and feet hanging on both the sides.Immediately it jumped out of the cradle and started running towards the backyard.
We have almost lived with monkeys and we knew the general behaviour of any monkey and the places they sit.My imagination ran riot.The most favourite place for the monkey used to be the concrete slab on the well, the top of coconut trees or the madhil suvar( compound wall ) of the temples. Since there was nobody at home, I was nervous.The monkey was nearing the well which was just 20 feet away.
Suddenly I got a flash. I remembered the words my mother had spoken on an earlier occasion. " Monkeys think that they are the most beautiful creatures in the world. They would like to see and admire their own form in the mirror'.Without wasting a second I took a big mirror from the shelf and ran towards the monkey, & by some sounds attracted its attention. It was just 2 steps to reach the well. With prayer in my mind, & posing to be brave I just went in front of the monkey and showed the mirror just against its face. Immediately the monkey became too happy or inquisitive and dropped the baby on the mud floor just adjacent to the parapet wall.I just threw the mirror near the monkey in which it seemed to enjoy its beauty.Everything happened within one minute.
I took the baby inside, bolted the doors.It took nearly an hour for me to regain my normal breath.Luckily the child had no problem except a mark of the monkey's teeth. on her waist.As she was just an infant she didn't feel panicky.It was a rebirth to her.

But an information which had been received by me casually helped me in a crisis.Our education, degrees, intelligence or our official position may not be of help on such occasions. Only our commonsense,samayochitabuddhi and swiftness matter a lot.By divine grace we should get strength of my mind to get at the right idea and implement it in right time, right speed and the appropriate manner.

Actually the information was given to me when I was just 8 years old when my mother used to tell about the Ramar Pattabhishekam( coronation of Lord Rama) when the monkeys were decorating Sita for the festival.They decorated themselves also and stood before Sita & told her with pride that they looked more beautiful than Sita herself and that if Rama had seen them earlier he would not have thought of Sita.
Things that look little and insignificant ,assume the greatest importance in our life.
Even today I shudder to think about the incident.IThe monkeys normally throw anything and everything into the well.What if the baby had been thrown into the well? Lord Hanuman only saved her.

Jayasala 42
Click to expand...

Dear Jaya,
Now that was scary and u had one hell of a [presence of mind.So scary really.yes ur baby was saved by yr presence of mind Jaya.
Regards
kamal

Kamalji · Sep 16, 2016

Viswamitra said: ↑

Dear Kamal,

When I saw the heading "Monkeys and Selfies", I thought Monkeys have become state-of-the-art to take selfies of their own. After reading the snippet, I realized that you covered two separate topics.

Those Monkeys found in IIT campus must be intelligent enough to get admission or must have bypassed the entrance test and admission procedures to attend free classes.

Regarding selfies, I don't understand the logic of the Ministers taking selfies when they commit adultery. Don't they use their common sense that their position would be at risk if those selfies were to get out in public domain? If their leader is from IIT, they behave like the Monkeys attending free classes.

Viswa
Click to expand...

Dear Vishwa,
Well there was this case of a monkey taking a selfie, and the big controversy over who owned the rights to the pic, the photographer whose camera it was, or the monkey who take the selfie on his own.HAHA
Yes intelligent monkeys, who got in the IIT, other monkeys are roaming the forests eh !
Well kejriwal is also from IIT, i think hehas learnt a few tricks from the monkeys, seeing the way he is running Delhi.
Regards
kamal

Balajee · Sep 16, 2016

If the monkeys bite the students. they should accept it cheerfully as blessings of Lord Hanuman. Any attempt to shoo away the simians will invite the wrath of bhakts who in their devotion can lynch you and do even naughtier things if you are a woman.