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Money Management between wife and husband

Discussion in 'Money Matters' started by chillax, Jun 15, 2010.

  1. chillax

    chillax New IL'ite

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    What is the best way to handle money issues between husband and wife if both are working i.e house hold expenses, savings , investments etc... especially when the in-laws are only greedy and money minded and a has a complete hold on your spouse and infulence your spouse.
     
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  2. shrikala

    shrikala Senior IL'ite

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    Share the household expense AND joint-investment 50-50 and rest of his earnings he can spend on inlaws. you keep the rest of your money in a seperate savings a/c.
    for joint investment come up with a number like 10% from salary - 10% from his, 10% from yours.
    Remaining = Individual Salary minus Commute minus((rent+power+water+grocery+....etc) / 2 )
    10% or howmuch ever% from Remaining for joint investment
    rest you are free to spend at will but take a percent as pocket money and put rest for savings.

    hope this helps you. is your DH fair in sharing expenses, does he expects your salary also to be spent on inlaws?
     
  3. sarma

    sarma Senior IL'ite

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    Other than the standard advice about keeping separate accounts etc. here are some thoughts:

    The idea is to keep as little readily available cash (as OP is concerned that her hubby me dip into it) as possible by buying a range of retirement, educational, and/or semi liquid investments.


    • Max your 401k
    • Pay addtional payments into principal into your mortgage account
    • Fund your kids' 529 accounts to the hilt (529 plan - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia ); for kids' education
    • Buy I Bonds at the Treasury (http://www.treasurydirect.gov/indiv/products/prod_ibonds_glance.htm) . In these some penalty features will make your hubby not wanna touch them for 5 years. Also have some tax advantage features to use proceeds for kids' education.
    • If you wanna be even more sophisticated, you could consider a low cost variable annuity at Vanguard (https://personal.vanguard.com/us/funds/annuities). You should always run as far away as possible when you hear the phrase 'variable annuities' as these products are 'sold' rather than bought because of the exorbitant commissions involved. If there is one place where they can be had, it's at vanguard because there is no salesman involved and the costs are the cheapest IMO., as vanguard is client (mutual funds themselves own the company) owned (The Vanguard Group - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia)
    • Buy gold and keep it in the locker. Personally I think gold is exorbitantly priced at this time. This suggestion because few Indian men (IMO) like to actually sell gold to raise cash, even if they are coins.
    Discl: i am not an investment professional and this is purely for informational purposes. Please do your own research. I am just a joe six-pack doing his own investments... Not everything is right for everybody. Please research for your situations or consult an ivesment professional or read this book http://www.amazon.com/Bogleheads-Gu...=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1276560153&sr=8-1
     
    Last edited: Jun 15, 2010
  4. shrikala

    shrikala Senior IL'ite

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    Sarma, a question for you. when you say 'The idea is to keep as little readily available cash as possible ' is it for the OP or is the idea in general?

    I always thought I should have a nominal bulk cash available for unexpected expenses instead of locking it in long term investments...
     
  5. sarma

    sarma Senior IL'ite

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    Only for OP as she may be worried that available cash is game for her hubby and her inlaws...
     
  6. chillax

    chillax New IL'ite

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    @ Shrikala - Thanks for the suggestion. We both have an equal income jobs. But he takes care of all the house hold expenses. I just take care of my personal expenses. Once in a while he says he will be happy if I contribute. DH never expects me to share the expenses. I was hesitatnt to put all the money in joint account because of my mil. She took all the savings - whatever he had before marriage and made him buy a house on her name. He basically started his married life fresh.
     
  7. chillax

    chillax New IL'ite

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    @ sarma, I like your idea of investing than keeping everything as liquid cash. I also like the investment options that you have suggested. We both max our 401k's due to the tax bracket we fall into. We had a baby recenetly so am looking into 529. DH will not contribute to 529 unless I do. Right now I took a sabatical for an yr to take care of new born DH.
    Once I go back to work I will have to start the 529.

    I am planing on suggesting to buy gold for DH.

    Since DH has a travelling job, haven't invested in a house yet. This is something am working on to settle down in once place.

    Have to look into I-bonds.

    I really appreciate your idea of investments. I think its better. We both invest togather , am also looking at an option to have an madatory signature requirements to take money out of it.
     
  8. Spiderman1

    Spiderman1 Gold IL'ite

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    Sorry to say - but what he had before marriage does not really belong to you. He is free to have done whatever he wanted with that part of it. Thats prior.
     
  9. SriVidya75

    SriVidya75 Platinum IL'ite

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    Totally agree with this:thumbsup

    Chillax

    I have this question, is your worry about money management in your family?? i.e b/w you and your husband?? or is it about how to minimize hte influence your inlaws have on your husbands finances??

    One thing is for sure, if someone gets easily influenced, its easy for you to make him see your point and its easy for his parents also to make him see their point. Rather than trying to minimize the influence his parents have on your husbands finances, why not meet a financial planner or some advisor and come up with the details on total money you both earn, how much you have saved so far, what are your future expectations, retirement planning, kids and their education etc...so basically its aobut short and long term planning and what are the factors. Best method is if you both sit and discuss with a financial planner, they would be able to show you all the calculations and whats needed for future. Might be this is one way of motivating your husband to see and understand that its time ofr him to growup and take the financial decisions on his own and not to let his parents influence him onto spending/buying something thats not really of worth down the line. (Not all real estate investments yield good profit)

    Think from what you have to do for your family and contribute equally. so that you wont feel scared and left out that your money is also being channeled to your inlaws
     
  10. chillax

    chillax New IL'ite

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    I agree provided he bought it before we got married not after. I just want to know how can anyone start a family life without a penny in hand. I paid all the bills including his cell phone initially when we got married and when he moved to US from uk even with having a job. moreover my mil keeps pestering me and keeps asking what did I do with the money that I earned before marriage.

    In all good faith I do want to share the financial expenses and invest togather. I just don't want to regret this desicion latter and would like to take the necessary precautions god forbidded in case we have to part our ways anytime.My mil threats saying that she will ask dh to leave me and DH threats to leave in case we have heated arguments.
     

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