As I entered your room half closed curtains welcomes me waving gently. You wouldn’t let me in when you were here. Your sticky stop sign on the door still makes me pause before I enter. Your favorite singers poster, your korean stickies, your scribbled drawings on the wall all stare at me. The room is just the way you left it. I too leave without disturbing anything. As I shop for weekly grocery I remember to buy a little less. I still have to get used to cooking a little less. I pick your favorites and put it back thinking I will get it when you come for a visit. That’s when reality slowly descends. Visiting is all that’s going to be. When my colleagues asked me few days back how I was doing with you away, I put a brave face and said I am happy for you. I also told maybe the reality has not sink in yet. And today was that moment. My days were filled with little arguments between us. Sometimes it ended up in big fights. But you gave me an opportunity to grow from within. You helped me realize who I truly am. You showed me the immense strength I had within. You were the reason behind a social cause I am contributing today. Everything began with you. I fought my toughest battle with life holding your little hands. When everyone I loved left me be it a friend or family you came back to me everytime giving me hope and showing me I was just a human. For your age I admire your quest for knowledge. I admire how you believe in what you do even if it’s against the norms. I was taken aback when you told me how we guys raised you so independently that it has given you confidence to go out in the world. I am still an imperfect parent still learning. You are my greatest teacher. I am already missing you so much. I miss seeing you at home. I miss the sound of your name around me. Day begins thinking about you. It’s hard to swallow a bite thinking you might not be eating the same food. I know its life. We all moved away from our families. But the bond became stronger. Hope our bonds strengthen too with distance. I wish nothing but the best for you like any other parent does. Ending with the lovely song we share Vazhvu thodangum idam needanae - Life began with you Vaanam mudiyumidam needanae - Sky is our limit Kaatrai poala nee vandhayae - You came like a breeze Swasamaga nee nindrayae - You became my breath Maarbil oorum uyirae - You are the life that oozes in my heart Oru dheyivam thandha poovae - You are(a flower) the blessing of the divine This is just a mother’s plight being away from her child where she lets a part of her out in this world to experience life. Life goes on just like a river that flows downstream.