MIL starting to show her real colours

That's why I asked how things went at her psychiatrist session. None of us have met ICY in person, so the psychiatrist (a trained professional who has met ICY in person)'s opinion would be very insightful as to ICY's mental state.

 

Shilpa and et al, I don't think the issue is with her comprehending skills. She did respond to one of my posts.

She would have persistently been think about the MIL and the DH. She doesn't need the support of us the faceless and the nameless people. She needs the support of her husband and her family. The husband must genuinely care for her, must share her feelings and work with her. He has to come down several steps if she is willing to walk a few extra steps. This goes both the ways. This type of insecurity will make her always ponder about some non-existent conversations between the mother and the son. This is an infinite loop. One day she will be thrown out of this loop because there will be no space to wind further. Instead of working hard towards making the husband come on knees, isn't ignoring a better way.

The mind is only working on MIL, and DH; their ulterior motive. Maybe she even imagines them to be singing a mother-son-love song.

Shilpa, we are not bullying her. The trend of this post speaks volumes.

 

Icy,

By any chance are you a single child to your parents.. Are your parents affluent?.. The reason i'm asking this is, parents usually over pamper their only child.. The child never learns to compromise, gets everything at the blink of an eye.. Parents never put the child through any hardship?.. Is this the case?..

Or another extreme possibility is spending your childhood with abusive parent/s.. But i dont think this is your case..

Icy, in real life you need to compromise at every step.. I wanted to know what is triggering your suspicion at your husband and in-laws.. Let me tell you one thing, you come to this world alone and leave this world alone.. So you have to learn to live alone.. If you are thinking things like husband is a soulmate, maybe in your case it is not true.. Ofcourse there are some lucky ones out there..
Do you suspect any kind of conspiracy in losing your job?.. Do you have any solid proof to support their conspiracy?.. If you dont have any proof then simply stop thinking so..
I suggest you get CBT/psychotherapy done, because right now you are not able to view things in a clear sighted manner.. There are too many things on your mind.. You are further destabilised by your husband and in-laws coldness..

Go live with your parents for sometime, you'll get some solace of mind.. Then when you feel fit to face your in-laws and husband get back to them..

Girl, first take care of yourself and then work on your marriage

 

Ladies,

do you all even think she is reading any of your suggestions or advices. Each time she posts completely different issue and does not even bother to answer any of your questions..
i hate to see all you ladies wasting your precious time over this... to think her problems are not even connected most of the time with her original issue...

i think moderator should close this thread for everyone's benefit....

 

No. That would not be correct. She (icy) can post, and whoever wants can respond, others can freely ignore. I do believe she has some issue and maybe professional counseling will help her.


Icy - if you can update abt the psych. visit.

 

I don't believe she has any psych. issues.
Simply she is immature to handle the people and issues in her life.
Her parents should have simply spoiled her from beginning and she can't take things in control, which didn't happen in her 20 years of life.
For lot of people who are matured and patient also, managing a marriage life is very challenging.

What a teenage girl would think of marriage? She only dreamed of fun activities and no role of responsibility.

Even ICY fantasy world dreamed of marriage world as joy but not any responsibility even for her and husband. That’s where the problem is and she simply needs to grow up.

 

I am with priya 100%. She does not seem to have any psych issues. She must have led a very sheltered and pampered life so far and she is unable to cope with married life. Frankly even her MIL does sound like a nagging type. Personally I feel she just unburdens her daily irritations here which most of us have learnt to cope with. And looking at her threads though she looks pampered, she has been taking the advice of ILs and been implementing it also . She needs some time, that's all.

 

Somehow I miss it if Icy does not come here and post about something. I've gotten used to reading her posts daily.

I think of her like a lil' sis, and while I have responded to her a bit strictly sometimes, I still think we should help her find her feet. She is doing what the IL-ites tell her - just that it takes her a bit longer to get it all figured out since she got married when she wasnt ready.