MIL starting to show her real colours

It is only in Indian society where I have seen so much of this "write and give contract" or "sign this blank piece of paper" nonsense. Really, I have never seen anything like it... Indians fascination of paper signing. It's just so annoying and worthless. Are papers like this even worth anything if a person is forced to sign? Or if there is no neutral witness? And for a contract to even be a "contract" doesn't there have to be certain elements to even make it binding? Personally, I feel half the time this "sign the paper" talk is involved, it's between ignorant people who are just trying to intimidate one another or sound over smart.

I'm not familiar with the laws in India, but here in US, a randomly signed piece of paper wouldn't be worth much, if anything. If anyone in India would like to enlighten me about this paper signing crap, I'd be interested to know if it holds any value.

In ICY's defense, I wouldn't get along with my inlaws (or husband either) if any of them shoved a paper in my face and forced me to sign it just to resume my normal marital life. It's just so cheap and stupid. I would have taken that paper and crumpled it up and told them where they could stick it (i.e. a place where the sun don't shine). Maybe Icy's problem is... they're playing nice now, but it's probably hard to forget their earlier dramas. Is that it, ICY?

p.s. I still maintain my stance that you are immature and over dramatic. However, I wasn't aware of the earlier drama caused by your inlaws... it sort of adds validity as to why you don't like them. I wouldn't like them either if I were in your place.

 

ASG, I don't believe in signing a contract. The peace treaties between India and Pakistan doesn't work and how will it work in a marriage? The moment a contract is signed, the concept of marriage is lost. We tend to live by the contract and either party can be sued depending on the violation.

There is a definite need in doing a year long spring cleaning of the idea and the institution of marriage. As mentioned earlier, in Icy's case, mistakes are happening from every person.

Unless the parents are terribly sick, old, and are unable to take care of themselves, it doesn't make any sense in them moving with the children. The children must support them in every possible way but living together under the same roof is a pain in the butt for all of them.

Men must never ever marry if they are unable to identify what they really want from marriage and a wife. Calling names, hitting the wife, sending her back home and lot more are only signs of unmanliness. A man doesn't become manly because he's able to do just that one obvious task. A woman doesn't become a woman because she cooks, cleans, washes and participates.

 

Amen... half of the terror attacks will get over :crazy!!!!!!!

 

Dont imagine stuff. I dont think they'll let you go out of work just coz your DH talked to your mgmt or something. I dont even think he did that.

In all probability, the same childishness you show at home may manifest in other areas, and work is an extremely professional environment.

Let it go, take up another job and be professional at your workplace and impress them. Work on YOURSELF (forget DH, MIL etc) and get yourself ready for life.

 

Icy, leave aside DH and MIL for a while
Pls reiterate how was your first and last week at current work place.
What was the nature of work and if you were able to cope up.. if you were surfing net in first week and writing on indusladies from office.
Whats the reason given to you on your pink slip?

Moderators can we pls change the topic of this thread to - "ICY & solution to her hardships".

 

Shilpa, it is incorrect right now to ask her why she lost the job. This is bound to happen when a person is in utter emotional turbulence. I have been through this situation. The state of mind, our body language, facial expression everything's noticed.

Icy's problems have stemmed out due to insecurity. Why is she insecured? Her inlaws have earlier recommended her to go to a psychiatrist. What prompted them to ask her to go to one? Why is she paranoid about her inlaws? There's way too much of character analysis going on abou the DH and the MIL.

I asked the same kind of questions in one of the responses, but I never got a reply. If Icy wants a solution to her problems, she must answer our questions.

First she must work on herself. I'd recommend her atleast living in India as a paying guest and doing some small time job. This will give her some exposure to deal life by herself.

You are asking us what we think. All of us are trying hard to show you an easy peaceful path. Maybe for a change Icy, you want to hear this.

1. Your MIL is a scheming witch.
2. She's trying to do blackmagic on you and split you and your husband.
3. Your DH is a chicken; useless even in a tandoori shop
4. He's only after you for the few moments of pleasure and is bound to dump you soon.
5. MILs motive is to keep her son under her thumb.
6. DHs is a coward and is unable to do anything.
7. When you are away, your DH called up the management of your company and asked them to send you out or maybe he bribed them with few 1000's of Dhirams too.

I feel very stupid for having written the above, but maybe you want to hear them. I have done the honors. :thumbsup

Bottom line do you want to continue this marriage or walk-out. Anyways, your MIL according you appears to be the best divorce lawyer on the block. Before you are pushed to the brink, you can help yourself.

 

Hahahahhaha I'm going to use this in real life someday (and in my mind, I will definitely credit you Canwait for this hilarious line). :rotfl

ICY,

I hope this isn't too personal, but I'm dying to know. Did you ever go to the psychiatrist? If so, what did they say? If you don't want to share that information, by all means, tell me to mind my own business.

 

till date i have never seen this girl coming up with answers other ILs are asking..she comes and just throws some incidents that happened and asks for solutions and poor ILites try their best to get some answers and the same thing repeats
NO WONDER WOMEN ARE THE MOST PATIENT CREATURES IN THE WHOLE WORLD

 

Hey guys lets not bully her a lot.
This can be a case of true attention defeciet.
One week of hiring & firing says a lot of issues if a person is not able to carry out even the basic instructions given by the mgr.

We've seen her pattern of replying and posting.. its a new issue after the other & she might be reading and still not able to acknowledge or retain any suggestion given by a poster.
We all acknowledge each others reply to our post.. however its missing in Icy's notes.

There's a huge gap of her needs and expectations with people around her.