Mental Health: Coping With Lows.

@GeetaKashyap - Thank you for this write up. It's extremely helpful. I hope everyone shares their thoughts. It's only going to help someone.

I've always told everyone who cares to listen that running has saved me from myself. Running and yoga combined has kept me out of going looney even on very high stress days. Now I'm trying to get back into that rhythm. Exercise really works. That said, I have made so many friends lately who are relying on antidepressants to make through the day. It's hard to do keep going when there is no end in sight and when there is no way to fix certain things. I love those women and am glad they went for the help they needed to keep going. Thank you for highlighting the fact that getting help isn't a sign of weakness.

I find it also helps to train myself to look at the positives. I have so many things going for me. It helps me immensely to be grateful for what I have rather than grieve over what I cannot control. I had to make myself get over negative thoughts and ruminating endlessly over the possibilities, giving myself a very hard day and sleep deprivation. I have to say the following to myself -
It is this but not that other thing, be thankful. Look at that other thing, look how good that other thing turned out. Don't look at all the people who are not there for you. All the friends who are no longer around really don't matter. Look at all of those who are there for you, who have risen to the occasion, who are trying so hard sometimes to make you feel better. Look at those people who have surprised you by their maturity and support.. Plus I now know who my real people are, my pod!

Then, there is this matter of being excluded that hurts me sometimes. I make myself look at the amazing events powered by hard working volunteers with such great inclusions. Those inclusions make up for the exclusions.I make myself think of those things and schedule those events.

When I put all the loses and all the gain next to each other, the gains seems so much more. The loses were all shallow anyway. There is power in positive thoughts. Positivity begets positivity. Always looking at the silver lining helps me quite a lot. I am not an optimist by nature. I've had to train myself to be this way and it is helping. I've trained my DH to be this way too and I can see it has an impact on him too. (Now only if I can get the negative nellie in the house to follow suite )

Of course, it's not always possible to be positive. I have my lows too. I was wondering where to leave them. I have other women around that I sometimes write to. It helped. Just putting it in words helps. Knowing there are others in the exact same situation helps. Even though we can't fix each other's problems, just know that I'm not alone really has helped me. I find it very therapeutic to just share with another woman who gets it. Although I keep telling myself that it's selfish to want another to go through what I am going through, when I have that other person, it makes me less lonely. Not because she is also suffering but because I cannot explain this feeling to someone and I don't have to explain it to her. Just saying - bad day today (.......) and getting a response back saying - oh yeah (....similar story....), it shall pass or I get it - makes a difference. For me that urge to not be alone and to want to have company in my misery is embarrassing to accept but it's something that people in any situation out of their control can consider. There are support groups of all kinds out there and you might find someone in the same situation as you.

Distractions help. Find a cause other than my own miseries and volunteering towards that helps me. I know I'm very good at what I did in my job and having someone entrust me with such a task and working on it is really boosting my morale these days. If there is no control, I can't anyway think about it and make it any better. Might as well put my skills to some good use.

 

An article on running and its benefits. I've read many in the past few years.