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Mad(e) for each other

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by mathangikkumar, Mar 19, 2011.

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  1. pritiviraji

    pritiviraji New IL'ite

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    what is your take on kids who don't resemble their parents?
     
  2. billybob

    billybob Gold IL'ite

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    Shantisubra
    -----You have a very twisted view of beauty, I am a typical brown colored unusually tall Indian, not considered to be beautiful by Indian standards, few of my Caucasian coworkers complement on my complexion and height, and advice me not to use makeup for complexion. Westerners do wonder why Indian actresses are fair and do not look like typical Indians? We are the most racist people on earth when it comes to color and caste.

    As far as in our house we do not like to watch south Indian movies with plastic faces who do not know how to act or deliver their own dialogues. This is just a phase in movie industry in India with no talent especially women, even most men in Telugu movies most of them are sons of old actors, one day it will pass away.


    As far love marriages are concerned if they marry or stray based on looks they were not mature enough to get married in the first place. Even in marriages where both are supposed be extremely good looking both of them may not be committed to each physically. Marriages based on good looks with out commitment to each other will not hold on long term.

    We adopted a dog from animal shelter not supposed to be a good looking both by Indian and American standards. We go for long walks every day, first couple of months no one complemented him, now after three years most of them like him for his personality.
     
    Last edited: Mar 20, 2011
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  3. mathangikkumar

    mathangikkumar Platinum IL'ite

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    Dear Shanta

    I am glad that you understood the write up, wherein I merely mentioned about the 'in thing 'in the society. How much ever one says, the color difference is very much there and one cannot overlook it.

    The mushrooming of beauty parlours , the urge to make their girls look good urges the mothers to take thier kids to the beauty parlour at the age of seven, which pains me because the same womankind is bent upon looks and enhancing the child at a tender age!

    What to say here is it the inner beauty or the outer beauty.

    I have seen people who have taken part in TV shows like Neeya Naana and Jackpot prior to the TV appearance visit the parlour so that they look beautiful and not presentable. Can these things change a person's looks, whatever we are born with should be thankful to God for having given the body parts in working conditions rather than go for surgeries to modify as per one's needs.

    The film industry definitely goes for fairer skin and that's the reason we do not have good actresses who emote thro' their inner beauty.

    Whatever we say ,the looks do matter in films and TVs, inner beauty comes only when you move with the person or give a chance to expose the inner beauty.

    Why do the film portray the villain's company as dark, hefty, ruffian look instead they can go for Amul baby looks and calm faced people?.


    I think this thread will have no end because it does not end with the racism but also the people's attitude. The society consisting of people like us to change it by strongly voicing our view point in this matter.
     
  4. kma

    kma Gold IL'ite

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    Anybody can visit a beauty parlour to enhance their positive points and not necessarily to become fair. What's wrong if you just want to have a good relaxing time in a spa irrespective of colour or beauty?

    Regarding film heroines, there are plenty of dusky skinned actresses too in the south as well as in the north.Just to take an example, Bipasha and Priyanka are not milky fair right?

    Dont develop a defensive attitude just because of colour. I am wheatish and siblings are lighter skinned compared to me, but I never got the feeling because my mom never let me have that feeling. People who were nice commented on my features and the not so nice commented on colour. But did it affect me? Not much.
     
  5. fencesitter

    fencesitter Platinum IL'ite

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    well, as long as couples do not have issue with each others appearances, others' opinions do not matter. Thread starter has stated certain obvious facts of India.Indians do have obsession for fair complexion. Sharuk khan, John Abraham, and down south, Surya, shamelessly promote male fairness creams! About women fairness products' advertises less said is better. It indicates how much fairness is valued in Indian society. And in cities like Bangalore, i have seen young school going girls, some are in first standard, taken to beauty parlors regularly!
     
  6. billybob

    billybob Gold IL'ite

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    Fair skin seems to compensates lack of talent, language skills at least in Telugu movies most of the heroines are from north India. All of them have similar voice, (same dubbing voice) and mannerisms, cannot relate heroine character to her parents, or boy friend.
     
    Last edited: Mar 22, 2011
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  7. ArunaSashi

    ArunaSashi Bronze IL'ite

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    I Agree!

    Whats ur business with how a person chooses his wife! Its his life!

    Just cos his wife doesn't look good, ppl won't visit his house anymore??!! Ppl like that better not visit!
     
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  8. lakvishy

    lakvishy Senior IL'ite

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    Hi folks,

    This is an open forum, where anyone can voice their opinion on anything. Then why is it that there are some members who say one must not post ones narrow minded opinions on this fora. Trying to gag anyone is not done.

    Any thought process which is not liked, should be replied likewise. ie. pointing the wrong thinking and how and why should it should be changed. That way, a small change can be tried to be made.

    Ultimately, an individual will always behave in the way he wants.
     
  9. SuccessMinded

    SuccessMinded Gold IL'ite

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    Well my take on this..

    i agree with the OP as well as everyone who replied.
    In my case, I had an arranged marriage. There is no way for me to know how good my DH is, or what his qualities are in the first meeting. However, after 2-3 meetings, we are asked to decide if we want to marry so and so or not.
    All those who had arranged marriages will agree with me that, looks did play a role if not an important one during the decision.
    For me, it was nature, mannerisms, education, family and looks in that order.
    But looks did come into place.
    Every day of my life, I have to get up to see the face of my DH, so I better like it.
    But, is looks everything? NO
    I never wanted a DH who looked very good either.
    Just moderate, decent looks that I can live with.

    As far as complexion, that was never in my list. Dark, Fair, doesn't matter and so was it for my DH.
    It was out mutual compatibility in our first 2-3 meetings that helped us made the decision.

    So don't completely put down the OP's views. But at the same time, it is not entirely true.
     
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  10. Spiderman1

    Spiderman1 Gold IL'ite

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    I agree with this.
    One lesson that experience (in IL or anywhere) teaches you is that it is futile to try and change someone else. They just wont. Change can only happen if the person himself or herself decides to change.

    However - people post counter points to what the OP posted here, to register their shock and protest. That registering it is also a valid statement to make.
     
    Last edited: Mar 24, 2011
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