m doing the right thing... no more inlaws around...

Hi all..

I've meaning to share this wid u all from quite some time now.. bt after my baby's birth things were so hectic.. finally after 7months i gt time.

 

oh whats this ?? i wrote everything bt nothing got posted her

 

well let me go again... n guess this will be a long one... so lets start..

mine is a love marriage... hubby is so so supportive... bt the problem starts here...
mine is an inter-cast marriage (also financial status difference).. IL's had no problem.. jst problem frm parents side bt tat got sorted out... hubby came to my city 12 yrs back.. he was all alone no financial help form parents.. he came here to study bt my IL's nvr helped so he somehow worked n managed on his own.. there was a time wen he used to eat jst once a day to save.. poor DH.. he worked hard n managed everything on his own.. nvr asked a single penny frm his home. Today by gods grace he is settled having his own home (self purchased through his savings)..

Now Hubby has an elder bro (Married with kid), n 2 younger sister (one married with kid ) another one searching going on.. so my IL's start.. my IL stay at other place which is 12hrs train journey. i had a baby girl 7.5 months back. wen my DH gave them a call they were sort of happy bt dint came to meet us till one week and the reason given tat time was no seats available in train. As i was hospitalized my DH dint hadtime to check for reservation bt wen i was bk home he checked and found out the train was nearly empty... (Turns out they were lying or jst dint wanted to spend their money to come see me n my baby girl m sure if it wud have been a boy they wud have came immediately) finally DH booked their tkt n they came. here we have a custom that wen u see baby for first time u give some money (Any amount). So wen dey came they got some clothes (Which Later i found out that some clothes were used ones) n J&J (Small Kit). No plans of giving any money so to save some grace my DH gave Rs500 to them to give it to my DD. Next my IL's Met my DH after 2.5yrs coz he he dint go home so often n even they nvr showed any affection towards him. My MIL insted of cooking for her son told him to buy food for nxt 2 days.. she dint even cooked for her son (My DH felt really really bad for this) ok.. so this part is over

now my SIL need to be married n they have dowry custom. No \body will ask openly bt it is understood that we hv to give me n my DH are totally against it bt no one will listen to us. So wen the boy's family came to see my SIL my MIL bragged a lot abt us saying that we stay outside n both me n my DH earns n all Blah blah. n she calls my DH n says tat my SIL wedding will be done by my DH as she is her responsibility which i fail to understand. Firstly mine was a love marriage bt i hv nvr taken a single penny from my IL's. Secondly my BIL has clearly said since he has a kid he wont give a single penny to anyone he will only take care of his wife n daughter. My BIL stays with my IL's bt nvr gives anything for house exp. my IL's do not hv any problem with that bt they say tat we shud send money to them as everything is our responsibility. y shd we do this?? y my IL's nvr say nything to BIL n his family ?? even my DH is clueless abt it.. my DH has clearly told them tat even he has responsibility n he cannot afford to ignore them as m not earning now my DH needs to look a us as well. He told them that whatever amount his Brother will give for SIL wedding he will match it not a single penny more (Smart Na?)

Now my IL's are caling dh n telling tat dey want to come n spend some time wid me n their grand daughter bt m in no mood for tat. I ws really hurt by deir behaviour wen my dd was born so i dont want them around nymore.. my mil went to the extent of saying it to my dh now we shud give her a grand son.. what a bad thing to say. Does she has brains?? Firstly i've jst had a baby she is not even an yr older secondly it dosent matter if it was a girl or a boy infact we always wanted a girl nvr even thot of a boy.. my dh to got angry at this bt dint showed.. he jst told me to ignore it bt i really dint like it. Few days back my fil calls n says to my dh tat his shoes r torn n that he shud buy it for him. My dh has no problm n he straigh away send money bt he dint like tat only for this my fil called bt nvr wud call otherwise to ask my dh how he is n all...

So finally i've straight away told my dh tat even tough he dosent want to accept it bt his parents are only interested in his money not at all in him or his life. Thankfully because of their behaviour we r nvr going to hv tem around