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Life Is About Learning

Discussion in 'Snippets of Life (Non-Fiction)' started by iyerviji, Aug 10, 2020.

  1. iyerviji

    iyerviji Finest Post Winner

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    In life, things happen around us, things happen to us, but the only thing that truly matters is how you take it and what you learn from it, not only we have to learn but dont make the same mistake again. It depends on how we react to it and what we make out of it. . Life is all about learning, adopting and converting all the struggles that we experience into something positive.

    Happiness is not in leading a luxurious life , in a relation we have to understand each other , find time to keep our spouse happy and do those little things for each other which will build intimacy. Life is full of imperfect things and imperfect people. I’m not the best . But what I’ve learned over the years is that learning to accept each others faults – and choosing to celebrate each others differences – is one of the most important keys to creating a healthy, growing, and lasting relationship.

    Failure is a part of learning. We should never give up the struggle in life. You Fail not because you are destined to fail, but because there are lessons which you need to learn as you move on with your life.

    We have to learn to respect and respect you have to earn, you cannot force it on others to respect you. There is a thin line between Fear and Respect, every one of us should understand it and do necessary corrections in our personalities.

    Life is Short. Spend much time as you can loving and caring people who love you. Enjoy each moment with them before it’s too late. There is nothing important than family. In everone's life there are strange experiences. sometime it shocks you and sometimes it may surprise you. We end up making wrong judgments or mistakes in our anger, desperation and frustration. However, when you get a second chance, correct your mistakes and return the favor. Be Kind and Generous. Learn to Appreciate what you are given.

    We learn everything from experience, thats why elders teach us what they learnt and try to make us a better person but in our young age we dont realise that they are advising us for our better and dont give importance to some advises which we realise later after aging only that why missed learning what we were taught.

    When I look back I remember the good advices my grandmother used to give . Without having much facilities they lived they had to struggle a lot but still they lead a life with peace and happiness. They were satisfied with what they had , thats why they were happy
     
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  2. jayasala42

    jayasala42 IL Hall of Fame

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    In early years every one wants to enjoy and be happy and they don't think about taking experience as a lesson. We go on doing our work even without having time to look back or introspect on the goodness or badness.Though we learn lessons in between, we do not try to avoid the mistake.Sometimes the struggles are too much and stress is made on forcing us to learn.Even then that particular mistake, we will take care not to commit, but unknowingly we end up doing some other wrong thing.

    When we built house,I was just 25.With great enthusiasm we took care on each and every point, but there were a few mistakes which had to be corrected after spending hundreds.

    Certain blunders are irretrievable.If we commit mistakes in choosing an unsuitable partner either to ourselves or to our children,the life is lost for ever.There is no chance to learn lesson regarding that alliance.We may lament.But any lesson learnt will be of no avail.
    Think well, plan well considering all aspects whether it is education,building home or settling in life.Lessons learnt will not be any use later.
    Even a wrong decision in medical treatment or a wrong surgery done in haste will result in great harm.
    For simpler things like wrong choice in buying a saree or jewel may at the most end in financial loss and the lesson learnt may help to avoid similar purchase.But life is not that simple.

    Problems faced by our parents/grand parents were simpler though they had many children.Modern era especially with corona like epidemics, seeking alliance abroad, having education in foreign universities, giving a culture shock to our dear children-everything is problematic.

    We have to think in advance of the problem map, have a thorough analysis and prepare well for a few sho
    cks,out of which there may not be any lesson learnt .

    Jayasala42
     
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  3. iyerviji

    iyerviji Finest Post Winner

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    Thanks for your lovely feedback
     
  4. Thyagarajan

    Thyagarajan IL Hall of Fame

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    :hello:A pointed take on mistakes we’ll thought of and written succinctly. You have begun well with an anonymous quote.

    Many mistakes are made in the life of individuals and also in the birth of new Nations but by the time they are realised or recognised as huge mistakes, damage occurred found irreversible . Bharat was divided as India & Pakistan. You know the result of that mistake.

    In July 2018, to save and protect few private Patta lands, the lake surplus water released. It resulted devastating floods and disaster in chennai. Government realised it was a mistake.

    Do We learn from mistakes. Yes & No. we learn to make new mistakes. Otherwise how rail accidents, Air disasters & ship wreckage continue to occur. Yes Thomas Alva Edison said that he made around ten thousand mistakes before successfully discovered the correct method to get the glow from an incandescent lamp.

    Here is a story from Amy Rees Anderson - google.

    Once upon a time a daughter complained to her father that her life was miserable and that she didn’t know how she was going to make it. She was tired of fighting and struggling all the time. It seemed just as one problem was solved, another one soon followed.

    Her father, a chef, took her to the kitchen. He filled three pots with water and placed each on a high fire. Once the three pots began to boil, he placed potatoes in one pot, eggs in the second pot, and ground coffee beans in the third pot.

    He then let them sit and boil, without saying a word to his daughter. The daughter, moaned and impatiently waited, wondering what he was doing.

    After twenty minutes he turned off the burners. He took the potatoes out of the pot and placed them in a bowl. He pulled the eggs out and placed them in a bowl.

    He then ladled the coffee out and placed it in a cup. Turning to her he asked. “Daughter, what do you see?”

    “Potatoes, eggs, and coffee,” she hastily replied.

    “Look closer,” he said, “and touch the potatoes.” She did and noted that they were soft. He then asked her to take an egg and break it. After pulling off the shell, she observed the hard-boiled egg. Finally, he asked her to sip the coffee. Its rich aroma brought a smile to her face.

    “Father, what does this mean?” she asked.

    He then explained that the potatoes, the eggs and coffee beans had each faced the same adversity– the boiling water. However, each one reacted differently.

    The potato went in strong, hard, and unrelenting, but in boiling water, it became soft and weak.

    The egg was fragile, with the thin outer shell protecting its liquid interior until it was put in the boiling water. Then the inside of the egg became hard.

    However, the ground coffee beans were unique. After they were exposed to the boiling water, they changed the water and created something new.

    “Which are you,” he asked his daughter. “When mistake - read - adversity knocks on your door, how do you respond? Are you a potato, an egg, or a coffee bean? “

    Moral: In life, things happen around us, things happen to us, but the only thing that truly matters is what happens within us.
     

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  5. Thyagarajan

    Thyagarajan IL Hall of Fame

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    By the time a dad realises that his dad was right there his son goes telling around how bad his dad’s decisions were!


    This reminds me Steve Jobs death bed speech .
    Curtains Down 2017 Curtains Up 2018

    There can be numerous mistakes in various categories. It can be ‘err’ as in “ to err is human”.
    It can be aberration. Deliberate mistakes are made in shadow boxing between MIL & DIL or in court of law between two learned lawyers.

    It can be a fault in a boy but art in a lover.

    Mistakes arises due to misunderstanding. Due to other party’s amnesia or hard of hearing. Due to colour. Due to identical profile. Beliefs can be mistaken. It can turn out to be a “Himalayan Blunder” written by Brig. Dalvi post Chinese aggression in India during 1961.

    At home mistakes could be humorous. Worn out or discarded saree given to maid who comes next day wearing this and husband from behind mistakes maid for his spouse!

    One burner milk on another sambar simmering. In haste, salt added to milk and sugar into sambar! Irretrievably lost milk But Sambar can be tolerated.

    Refilling already half filled bottles with wrong grains ..mustard into jeera or fenugreek into broken split green gram.. water from just washed unwired hands drips into oil - a burning mistake. Dress worn in haste or hurry in reversed or shirt tucked in trousers with flyzip open - arrived at office - a mistake taken care of after noticing sly smiles of staff.

    There is more to mistakes and learning from it.

    Thanks and Regards.
     
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  6. iyerviji

    iyerviji Finest Post Winner

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    Thanks for your lovely feedback a d the story
    Moral is very true
     
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  7. iyerviji

    iyerviji Finest Post Winner

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    Thanks for your lovely feedback
     
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  8. Mithila48

    Mithila48 New IL'ite

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    Madam viji,
    In context to your above write -up I have something to share.

    Cost of a lie
    It is the time that I want to share one of interesting episode in my life. It was during one of those days I was in Bangalore working for a national health based project and my team head was a little sarcastic man.... so one day I became a little agitated when he had deliberately started annoying me with his bitter remarks on my work report. This impelled me to look for an alternate job.
    One of my senior colleague talked to me about a job offer based in Karnataka but affiliated to a foreign university in England. The job was found to be very lucrative with a handsome pay packet, didn’t think twice and applied for it.
    Since it was research based, local language was a must qualification. I thought I could manage it as it was quite similar to Telugu.... but the crux of the problem lied here.
    In the interview I lied to them that I was fairly conversant with the local language. After the job was secured the trials and tribulations started....
    The study was meant to be covering deep rural and urban areas. While I could fairly manage urban but found very difficult with rustic rural areas ... to converse in chaste Kannada as my mind was not nimble enough.
    I thought to share this now because it was the first time that I really experienced and exposed to the concept of gender equality.....in literal concepts of equality of participation in all domains. My boss who was European had literally opened my eyes.... the first shock encounter being to be self-reliant whether it was carrying a packed back pack walking in the night to and fro to the bus stop and lifting luggage to put in cabin..... until then I was used to seek assistance( I mean a porter). Moving around in the field with back pack was a second constraint for me apart from language. In addition to it a egoistic co-worker with selfish and competitive behavior. All the way thought this colleague would help me in translation but my hope remained grim.And I had to walk alone Kms in the deep villages with my colleague in a different route. I was under the assumption that we both will be doing the interview together and my translation would be taken care off. But in reality it was different ...
    When my boss later learnt about my drawback he gave me a deadline of a month to improvise the language. I toiled hard by engaging a tutor for one month and quickly learned the nuances of language but could not overcome the barrier.
    Now left with a conflicting mind either to tender resignation or continue to struggle hard had a little choice left. I was self-pitying myself thinking how my abrupt decisions displaced me from being vulnerable to miserable situation.
    But not knowing what is certain in future .... I didn’t continue for long but felt guilty for leaving the research at a threshold.
    Now the basic fundamental knowledge I gained in this process that gender concepts are not to voiced for but have to literally experience. When a women talks about gender equality .... you better know the meaning in all aspects. I never imagined to carry a back pack properly loaded on our backs walking Kms anywhere anytime ..... I felt why I could not work the same way as my male colleague. I understood that I need to motivate myself to work equally alongside men in the same wavelength. And another important message I learnt never to lie ....
     
  9. Thyagarajan

    Thyagarajan IL Hall of Fame

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    :hello:Never to lie blatant in job interviews. Realising it as a mistake long after the act itself is ok but will be difficult get it off the mind.

    2. Lie anywhere else also has the potential to boomerang at a very wrong time in presence of wrong people in a wrong moment causing irreparable damage to reputation of lier.

    3. In an interview, a set of four was interviewing the candidate C who had faired extremely well with three and the fourth one was the psychologist. He looked at candidate’s application and said to C
    “you claimed that you had three years experience but you had worked only for two years . Do you want to correct this statement in your application?”

    The lady candidate responded with a smile, “ Sir. It is true I worked only for two years but daily I worked overtime for four hours and so my experience is two + one = three years.”

    She was appointed.

    Thanks and Regards.
     

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