Ladies Living In Usa

Just ignore in laws who hurt you or give any stress. Just focus on your career, your family and your well being. It's everywhere same whatever you mentioned. Take care.

 

I’d like to share my perspective on this. I live in the country as the co-sister, while my other co-sister has migrated to the UK with her husband (my brother-in-law).

She often projects her lifestyle as superior to those of us living here, behaving as though she’s from a different world. This attitude tends to influence people, especially those who have never experienced life abroad, making them view her in a more glamorous light.

To some extent, I understand her behaviour. Having been away from the country for over a decade, it’s natural that her lifestyle and mindset differ from ours. However, it’s also basic wisdom to “do as the Romans do” when in Rome.

I’ve personally travelled to over 40 countries and spent two-thirds of my life abroad, yet I still see my country as home. My lifestyle aligns closely with many others here, but I’ve learned how to adapt and appreciate different ways of living. Unfortunately, my co-sister seems to struggle with this adaptability.

Initially, my in-laws believed my co-sister came from a wealthy background and held high expectations of her—financial support, greater respect, and additional privileges. My co-sister enjoyed the superior treatment until she realized it came with responsibilities. When she couldn’t meet those expectations, the narrative shifted. She began emphasizing the struggles and limitations of her life abroad, painting a picture of hardship compared to those of us living in the country. Which is true.

This changed the family’s perception entirely. Now, the in-laws view her and her family as “poor relatives” from abroad, and the respect they once had for her has diminished.

I find this disheartening. Respect should never be based on one’s status, lifestyle, or circumstances. It should be rooted in who a person truly is.

 

Yes. My Co sister used to feel very jealous of me. She lives with my inlaws who were strict with her.
Wheras inlaws used to be kind to me since I was visiting them for only a week every year. Also my husband used to send money to them.
Co sister also felt jealous because I was going on lots of vacations too in USA.
She used to irritate me when I was there.
I used to feel bad and angry too.

But when I put myself in her situation , zi may have done the exact same thing

 

Seriously?

Her lack of understanding about life abroad might make her feel envious of you. If she truly understood the struggles behind those Instagram vacation photos—the loneliness, homesickness during festive seasons or family emergencies back in India, the monotony, winter blues, and the sense of not belonging in a foreign land—she might begin to appreciate what she already has in her life.

Life is ultimately fair to everyone, though it may not always seem so on the surface.

A wealthy woman with a loving spouse might silently endure the pain of having an ill child. While the world sees her wealth, it remains unaware of her sorrow.
On the other hand, a poor woman might be blessed with a devoted partner and wonderful children, yet her joy may go unnoticed because of her poverty.

No one has everything, and no one has nothing. Yet, we often compare our lives unfairly, like apples to oranges, and let unnecessary envy cloud our perspective.

 

Not sure , you understood what i meant.
If I had been in her position, also with her minimal education and village upbringing.

Anyways it helped me to stay neutral and not be angry at her.
Since my husband loved his brother a lot, maybe I was just trying to maintain the relationship for his sake.
I don't know.

 

True. This cosister needn't worry about money.
All my inlaws property was given to them.
Also some from my husband's earning too(that's another story)
She born in a poor family with 5th std education married to a 10th standard educated guy. My bil runs a small-scale industry whose income is not steady.

At present.
My fil is no more. My mil is very docile now and having health issues.
She is enjoying now with all the property and ruling the house . Haha

 

See... Easy money as opposed to what we all do and sacrifice for earning the same money. They are blessed indeed, but they don't have IG photos to understand how blessed they are. This, they envy on us

 

During a spiritual talk, I happened to listen to this story. There were once ornaments on a woman. Let us imagine that they can think. Actually they were being jealous of each other. The bangle thought that the chain she was wearing was luckier , since by being bangles worn on the hands, they were subjected to too much wear & tear, lost shine since the woman was handling washing clothes, vessels etc. always getting wet.
At the same time the chain was thinking that the bangles were fortunate in that they can breathe well, unlike being being smothered under the saree most of the time. Actually the story was to explain a vedantic concept, but here we can relate it to our topic, each person or relationship has its own good and bad as well as disadvantages. But It is a fact that the relatives abroad do feel a bit superior, always think that they experience jealousy , impartial treatment etc., etc. from people at home in India.

 

Hey Reena, I live in USA. My FIL and BIL's family live in India. I stumbled upon this conversation since I was not able to sleep. Tomorrow is my BIL's house warming ceremony. My husband emptied all our saving's and paid for their apartment. My FIL has a house which will be shared among both brothers but after his death. So can't expect any amount from BIL untill the property is shared. So their apartment is fully paid with our money and my co-sister did not even call me to inform about housewarming. My husband does not think this as an issue since his brother informed him. Can't sleep. So please do not bother about anything and live happily and enjoy more and more and make your co-sister more jealous.