Kids and their shades!!!

Thanajmaan · May 23, 2009

:rotflHas anyone thought how our behaviour actually has a great affect on our kids? I have three girls, and all of them are unique in their own ways. When I had my first girl, i literally followed everything there was in the "book". I made sure no one ever said anything bad or shouted or any such thing around her. Today at age 11 shes a very...what can I call it...refined...girl. yea, that'll be the word! she's very careful how she behaves around others...and yada..yada..sometimes i wonder if I made a mistake, because I feel like she wants to live up to the image that I set for her. I like hearing comments like shes poised and very lady like and all that but at the same time, i am sure there have been times when i felt, that she supresses the urge to giggle and snort out loudly at a joke or is too concious about herself. I wonder if it has anything to do with the way i was when she wasa little.
When my second girl was born, i was definitely older, and even though there was success with the "book", i was too lazy to implement the same rules. So, my second one is very confident about herself.She gives a damn if her nose leaks or if she happens to snort while laughing!Shes only six now. But i feel theres a world of difference in the way they are. I wonder my sticking to the Book in the first run made my older one feel like she has to be a certain type, because thats expected of her!! My third girl is only two. Im letting nature take its course with her too. Maybe it'll bring out the best in all of them....
This is my first blog entry, so i thought i'd start with whats on my mind today! happy blogging to all and u r welcome to comment and give me your take on all of this. hope to make great friends on Indus!!

manchitra · May 23, 2009

It is natural that your daughters are different.They are different individuals . Each child is unique and carries some trait and the effect of the environment plays a big role. God has blessed you with 3 beautiful daughters .Support them to grow as good individuals.good blog

Thanajmaan · May 23, 2009

hey thanx manchitra...

sunitha · May 25, 2009

So true.With our first borns,we usually end up being too careful with everything and they too end up being less confident,I think because of us.By the time it comes to the second one,we are more relaxed,actually since we have to take care of both now,we don't have too much time to read a book and to implement it with the second and that reflects on the second one's behaviour too.

mssunitha2001 · May 25, 2009

Excellent write up.....!!!!!!!! Good topic to discuss upon....!!!!

Sure i too have noticed a remarkable change in behaviour between my elder son and younger daughter...they are so different...

the elder calm and quiet and the younger one cheerful and sings and makes funny sounds even in a crowd....may be as you said we had a lot of time to spend with our elder child and imposed all what characters...we think is best to ourselves ...ON THEM and for the younger child we had no time so they grew up to be themselves....

good ya...keep writing more....

-sunitha

swathi14 · May 25, 2009

very nice write-up. For the first baby, we want to give the best out of best, always with the kid. We will have the child in our shadows. But for the 2nd, with our little experience, we will be free and let our child also free.

Always, the first child will be shy & invert type of person.

andal

Thanajmaan · May 26, 2009

thanx pals...im still trying to figure out my way around motherhood...heheh...glad to know im not the only one who feels this way!!

Jpatma · May 28, 2009

True, each child differs and are unique. The DNA that we carry determines our innate nature and added to it is our upbringing.
You can't change the innate nature, but upbringing does influence a lot
Enjoy each of them as they are .
Jaya

aruna_077 · May 29, 2009

I really wonder why is a book needed here? As we are ourselves, kids shud be let to be themselves!! Only then can they discover themselves!
BTW nice blog!