keep laughing

Discussion in 'Jokes' started by krishnaamma, Mar 1, 2007.

  1. krishnaamma

    krishnaamma Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Read the jokes below...


    I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste.
    David Bissonette
    When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
    Sacha Guitry
    After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together.
    Hemant Joshi
    By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.
    Socrates
    Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them.DumasThe great question... which I have not been able to answer... is, "What does a woman want?"
    Sigmund Freud
    I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me.
    Anonymous
    Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.
    Henny Youngman
    I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years.
    Sam Kinison
    There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage.
    James Holt McGavran
    I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me, and the second one didn't.
    Patrick Murray
    Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming
    1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it
    2. Whenever you're right, shut up.

    Nash
    The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once...
    Anonymous
    You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to.
    Henny Youngman
    My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
    Rodney Dangerfield
    A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.
    Milton Berle
    Marriage is the only war where one sleeps with the enemy.
    Anonymous
    A man inserted an 'Ad' in the classifieds: "Wife wanted". Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: "You can have mine."
    Anonymous
    First Guy (proudly): "My wife's an angel!"
    Second Guy: "You're lucky, mine's still alive."

    THE END.:lol: :rotfl

    P.S.: Oh...tomorrow is Women's day...So dont laugh aloud, else <<CRASH>>:bangcomp: [I just heard the monitor crack...next shes gonna get u]

     

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