It happens only at In-laws's house

Dear friends,

I am really sorry to see that my request to keep humour above the belt has been misunderstood in this manner.

I reiterate, I have not criticized venting. Have always supported dils - am one myself and voiced my opinion against harassment. Have also vented about my own mil. No, am neither a mil and will never be one. It is only certain posts in this thread, some other threads and another thread by yet another poster which made me want to bring the other side to the notice to posters. Nothing personal against individual posters.

Bubblygal, I remember giving likes to a lot of your posts on this very thread. CP, I don't remember if I have done that to any of your posts or not, because I generally give likes to posts, not to particular posters. Surely it is not a crime to voice an opposing view?

In any case, I request you to kindly not quit if you are doing so because of my thread. That just was not the idea. If you are quitting for personal reasons, then I shall wish you all the best and a lot of happiness in your lives.

 

I have been a silent reader/follower of this thread. I dont know how much my opinion matters.

I have seen the other discussion and i know the reason for your quitting this. But trust me CP, BG and many people.. You guys have never i mean never fallen to the level where somebody would stop respecting you all.

We can not be all goody goody all the time. Its human nature to talk freely and deep down i feel, i would have done the same thing when i read your posts. So i (read we) can not say that, this is wrong.

Relation is two ways. All these 'politically correct' things are easier said than done. And i believe you all have done the right thing. Do understand this thread and many people need you all.

I have been married for almost an year now. And no major issues with PIL. They are good people except for some minor problems here and there. DH is a good man too.

I had all those daily soap 'adarsh bahu' feeling initially. After few months i started noticing, these things which i do out of love were being considered as my weakness. And i tackled all those situations with help of this thread and not being bad or spoiling anybody's peace of mind.

Enough of my story :tongue The conclusion(!)is, Many people need this thread and you all so dont go :drowning

 

CP and BG, please don't quit. You (and the rest of us) have done nothing wrong by venting out our frustrations at the outrageous behaviour of our elders.
True, there have been posts and threads which stooped too low. Such posts can be reported and deleted, I suppose. It does not make the rest of us culpable. It is patently unfair to expect that wives should be self-effacing in order to make a marriage 'work'. True, we present only one side of the coin. But is it not true for any poster young or old, male or female ?
In real life, many of our ILs would prefer us to keep mum and 'adjust'. I feel we have just attained this on IL.
More people need this thread than you can possibly imagine !

 

CP, BG,

Please dont go. You dont know me but after reading this entire thread over several several weeks, I feel I know you both very very well. (By the way, I want a prize or at least some kind of badge of honor from you for reading through this thread and making it through all the 720+ posts. Never done that for any thread!) Both of you are very nice, mature and well balanced posters. I have laughed with you and sympathized with you. Also learnt a lot. I really admire the grace and humour you have both displayed as you have each coped with what were no doubt intolerable situations. We need more real-life bahus like you not the psycho bahus of ekta kapoor. Please dont go. Please stick around and help celebrate the first anniversary of this thread, and then the second, third etc! ...

 

BG,
Its really sad to see you go. Your posts have been really awesome and they have given me a good laugh or two. And from what I read, you are one of the people who fought out of a really tough situation and came out with flying colors. So wherever you go, all the best and may god shower you with all his choicest blessings.

CP,
You are a really strong woman - who has faced a lot of crappy things in life. If you did not accept defeat there, they why here? Just because some people 'decided' that this thread is a place for 'below the belt' stuff? Does it make this thread bad? NO. This thread is one of those 'safe homes' for people like me, we come here to cry,laugh and vent. No other thread in the whole of IL has comforted people like this one has. This forum is the place that I have used to vent and get comforted by my friends here.
So please don't go. STAY HERE FOR US. PLEASE

 

CP,BG..please stay.

CP..you can't even imagine how this thread has made me laugh sometimes and gave me comfort many a times.Double standards exist in most IL cases and these virtual vents mean no harm to anyone.

 

CP and BG, please stay. BG, you need not vent, but come out with suggestions and comfort for others.
CP, you dont know how much you have helped me. When I had none to share a few things, you gave me a platform to share these and go off with a lighter mood.

 

Venting after a few weeks, does nt mean MIL turned better, but had some other chores.

I had malaria a few weeks back. MIL never came to find how I am. Most of you know we live just 2 blocks away. Co sis offered to come to doc with me, and only then we found I had malaria. MIL just asked why you got sudden fever and said she had come to cover the car. 3 days DH was doing all sevas for me(he was sooo sweet. Scolding me to eat, take tablets, cooking, taking care of DD, he was doing perfect job) MIL never turned up. After the weekend, DH had to go to work. So, I decided to go to my mom's place. MIL came in and said dont go, and we will take care. I listened and dropped the plan. Next day till 11 AM none turned up and gave an excuse I might be sleeping. I wake up around 9 AM, as DD sleeps only after 2 in the night. Nobody cared if the baby had milk or breakfast or I took tablets. My mom had to come with the lunch and help me in eating etc. Next day I just packed off and asked mom to pick me up.

 

Visari, dont expect and get upset.. Just throw out them from your mind..

Hard times would make your relation more strengthen.. Relax and take care..

 

for many things had happened in one day. im shocked to read post by bg, cp and satchi.
even though i had vented a lot on this thread about my sil and mil, at times i feel funny reading some posters venting on silly things done their ils. life is larger than what we knew. i don't agree when some of us complaining every single thing done by inlaws and degrading our own selves.
my mil always tell that life doesnt end now itself, we still have 20 or 40 years to go and we will experience alot more than what we have seen now. she says, controlling our behaviors and speech will save our face and dignity in later coming years.
but this thread has been my pillar support when i had to vent and share my problems i faced at home. and closing down this thread will be like losing an important part in my life. i will miss this thread alot, and also the friends that i got from this thread.
i hope we all keep in touch in IL and proof to others that we are not just immature dils but the strong and dils with dignity.
i really hope there is a similar thread or discussion thread for us to discuss (and vent) our daily life and share opinion. we all need a support group to remain sane!!!!!