Thanks to Mindvoice, a poster in IL who replied to a thread.. “the distance we maintain with in-laws,eventually it is we who end up alone”.. How true is that! When I was newly married,I had no inhibitions and happily went to my in-laws house..I was so thrilled with their first USA trip but only then I got to see their true colors! At the time of my marriage,just one hour before I had to walk to the Dias, my uncle came to me and said”Just be careful as your MIL is very possessive of her son”. I replied “No way! She is just perfect”. My uncle just smiled and left...little did I know! I was in H4 when I was in USA and to top it I didn’t know to drive a car.Inlaws arrived for their six month visit and we all stayed in a one bedroom apartment at that time..No iPad,no iPhone,no seperate rooms and this was 2005..imagine the nightmare I would have endured. I was very innocent at that time and every night I go to bed crying and I didn’t know to even share it with my mom or hubby at that time.My mil retired the moment I became a wife to her son and looking back I was nothing short of a doormat and a maid. Her words were really strong! There was not topic about me which she didn’t insult.Be it my looks,height,dressing,studies,the way I was brought up,my status,complexion,my cooking..name anything! I can really keep going on and on.. At one point..I burst out and asked “I do so much for you but still you are always putting me down.Why?” She replied” I really don’t know why” Hmm.. As I kept growing older..I tried to stand up in different ways but nothing worked.My father in law joined with her,supported her nastiness and it was always a win win with them.. This happened for 15 years and last trip she actually compared herself to my life and said am enjoying a lot and going out.I don’t think grocery shopping is entertainment! She makes sure to join us if I want to go out with my husband and little Did she know it was me who actually wanted her to come to every trip I take there coz am a Stupid woman who has mixed feelings and raised by annoying parents who always said “respect elders no matter what!”.. She hates it if I go out with hubby even now.. She talks like honey in phone and will be making her USA trip soon and I dread that.My kid is waiting to meet her as ofcourse all the grandparents need to do is say to the kid” you are so cute.my sweetheart!” and the child will Melt..we end up looking like fools.. Her son will always be the son.. Ofcourse we won’t be mean enough to make our kid go against her.so she will get their love too! At the end of the day..hubby will go to Work,kid will go to school,in-laws will happily watch their tv/shows etc and as a homemaker we slog at home like a maid and if the women is working outside..in many cases,the in-laws won’t be nice enough to help her out at home. It is a win win situation for them!!! There is no hope left for the dil. It is we who end up alone!