issue with in-laws - need advise

psych · May 4, 2010

yea i know. I have tried talking to him along those terms but he says his sis will not listen to anything. he really dislikes her but he knows that his monther supports his sisters ways so he wont be able to change her.

I will follow your first advise and see how that goes. if hes intrested in a good future then he will make those adjustments even if he doesnt like it. i dont know how i got into this mess.

ushkrish · May 4, 2010

hi psyche,
FL has been advising you on the right track. your dh's request on taking care of your sil's daughter, is ofcourse an indicator that he is completely satisfied, with you, and thinks how a girl should be brought up. and feels that your father did the right thing and wants his niece also to be same as you. from what i could decipher i feel that he thinks his parents ar e responsible for what his sister is today, and does'nt want the same trend to continue with his niece.
though he has not openly acknowledged, he also is fed up of supporting his parents, but he is unable to come out of the situation / don't know how to come out b'se it might be rude to cut o n the allowances he is showering on them. and might also adversely affect you, IL might think you are the person who stopped him fron giving them support. so he is hesitating. slowly, emphasis on him, he has started thinking in nthe right way, allow time for him to continue in the same line of thinking see to it that you keep things alive by making small remarks here and there. and things will start settling down soon. all the very best.
lov
usha

psych · May 4, 2010

thanks guys!!! I am going to follow these advise and see how it goes. will keep you posted!! Thanks once again!!! This has helped me tremendously.

psych · Jun 14, 2010

I talked to DH and he seemed favourable with the idea of putting moey away together for our sons college fund. so at.east hes secure! I have anther question. every weekend when DH calls her she keeps complaining about her husbabnd (DH's father). DH's daddy is a self proclaimed politican so he spends his money on politics. she always complains when he calls home. first it was the lack of money (FIL spending all money on politics - now we send them mony every month). after we started spending money now shes complaining that FIL gets home drunk and starts fighting. her solution is to bring his dad here. he was here once to see our son but he didnt like it ( he anted to drive the car w/o licencse wanted to smoke in the house didnt like my cooking..etc. typical in law complaints). now shes pushing DH to bring him here so that she can have some piece. Though the discussion of staying joint has not come up I had discussed this prior to marriage. I am having lot of health issues (dbtes BP) and a full time working mom. How do I keep my peace of mind? am not able to sleep becoz dont know what kind of next issue i will be facing with. i have no idea whats going on in his house and how much is true

sweetestshweta · Sep 24, 2014

Hi Psych..
I know its a very old thread but stumbled on it today.You seemed to be facing a situation like me.Please read my earlier posts for a better insight..
I have a dependent SIL who is extravagant and inconsiderate and a MIL who blindly supports her and tries her best to extract as much as she can from us..
Did you find a solution?Please share if yes
Now that a couple of years have passed,hows the overall situation?Any improvement?
Thanks