Issue with Hubby talking

kavyster · Oct 11, 2010

Hi Friends,

My hubby talks too much, i am okay if he is talking too much, but the problem is when he talks he just gives all the personal information. IF u ask him his name he will start from his name then to his job etc etc, just he goes with his talk.

I have tried many ways but nothing works out. But this is affecting as u know how people are now a days. Before hand if we know that we will speak up with anyone, i will tell him that not too say too much personal information, he says YES, but when comes to discussion he just talks and involves himself , i am not able to control, i have given signs when talking but that didn't work. Later on after the discussion is over, i will tell him that what he told me before he began talking what he has done now , he says sorry and next time it will not happen but repeats same thing.
But not sure how to control . Also I have observed when he talks he becomes so emotional and strong in talking and involves, which is really not necessary but indirectly creating us problems which he doesn't understand

Also some of his talks i am facing a problem , for example if he is talking on a topic and at some point when i talk even when i know what i am talking and also he knows that what i talk is sensible. But he just says in front of others that my wife doesn't know anything and this thing has repeately nearly 10 times, i keep on saying to him if front of others he can't say like that he says sorry and repeats the same mistake, Friends what should i do at that situation. I really feel bad when in front of others he says such a thing people may really see things like that when that is not the situation.

You might say not to interfere when he talks, but sometimes when he talks i have interfere to cut short certain things and also try to avoid him giving too much information which is not necessary for others but indirectly affecting us, he never understands

Please do help me how to handle the situation.

Thanks,

hemalathaK · Oct 11, 2010

Hi,
When he starts his conversation,go and sit close to him and if he goes beyond the limit just pinch him on his lap. Then he will get the clue.Otherwise before someone comes warn him that you are going to pinch him if he crosses the limit.Then he won't scream and create a scene .
But sometimes he may say the guest that you are pinching him.Because your DH seems to be too frank.:bonk
No idea comes to me other than this.Don't know how to help you.

RainLady · Oct 11, 2010

If he likes challenge then bet him that if he give too much personal information or he says you don't know anything then he has to do cooking for whole day. But don't be lenient if he fails in the bet.

Spiderman1 · Oct 12, 2010

kavyster,
What info is he revealing to others? Is it some serious thing that he is revealing?

Do not interfere and needlessly try to change him.
His nature is talkative, dont go and force him to be what he is not. I dont know what he is revealing, but if he is talking abt his job or what he does at work etc. thats not a problem.

But if he is revealing some private matter between you and him, then you can ask him to not do so. It does not sound like he is doing that.

paru72 · Oct 13, 2010

just tell him in advance that the next time he does that u will just place ur hand on him and say thats enough politely.that u will say that with a just smile so that no one feels awkward.

kareena16 · Oct 14, 2010

Hi,
My hubby n myself have this over talking problem tooo....but we created our oun sign language with eyes n hands. If any one of us crossing the limits we use them..

SreeSri · Oct 15, 2010

I regret to admit that I too have this bad quality at least 20% of the OP's spouse, I dont talk that much but at times, I repeat the same thing on and on for no use(which is again over talk )
There is one old lady who used a trick for his talkative spouse. When the hubby is talking out of context/control, the wife goes around his visible area, folds her arm and touches her cheek or something like that to SIGNAL to control. That hubby is a nice person to follow this good instruction from his wife, over a period of time, he got used to limit his talk..
Here the idea is to have a kind of SIGNAL mechanism with your spouse or closest people who can identify and signal you to limit the conversation at it overtakes the normal flow..
try to work out something like this, it may help at least for some extent