Is This An Issue I Should Be Worried?

I feel drinking limited qty twice a week that too vodka and wine is not a big issue to be worried upon. As it is if you are going to force him to stop it totally he might not like it. Generally none of us like to be controlled too much. So may be you can ask him to make it once a week but don't fight for this issue. It's not worth it.

 

yes you should be concerned. About what he eats with the drink, as well as why he does not want company while drinking. There are social drinkers and then there are drunks.
Take some effort to learn about vodka and wine. Make cocktails with vodka, and develope your own recipes for wine coolers . Get him out of the closet, join him, have conversations, share nonsense. Drinking isn’t like going to the bathroom; no need to hide and do it alone.

 

I have seen people who drinks exactly 1-2 pegs on every weekends (like your dh) or even everyday for years.

Some slowly starts increasing the days n the pegs, which is bad news n may lead to addiction n character change. Have witnessed how badly this affects families.

Some drinks with company n some alone, make sure the timing of this alone drinking doesn't increase. In one case, as the years went by, the husband liked his alone time so much that he used to lock up right after coming home from work, n I have witnessed how lonely the wife n kid felt, it was sad.

What you can do or watch out for..
- let him continue with two pegs or bring two pegs to one peg. It should not become two pegs to three pegs.
- let him continue with two days or bring two days to one day. It should not become two to three days.
- if you can bring down the pegs or days, then eventually he can leave it. Like maybe use the excuse of a child or a parents health issue or even yours or his own.

Don't complain about this at all times. But explain it to him that this is too new/ odd for you n it makes you extremely uncomfortable or that you hate the smell.
And maybe you can try sleeping off early those nights n not be intimate due to the smell or find some different stuff like that to do esp on the drinking nights.

Just watch out for addiction n see if it's increasing.

 

Anything in moderation is completely fine. Even I drink during the weekends. But it never was in a closed room. Why is he doing that?

It is advised to be taken along with some food. Also, keeping hydrated is important but really, couple of drinks every now and then is absolutely no problem.


Note that alcoholic beverages have different alcohol % in them. I.e a glass of wine has far less alcohol % than a glass of whiskey/ vodka. Hence a lot of people dilute whiskey/Vodka/gin etc.

I have known a lot of people who had been drinking in moderation for several years. I would not be worried.

 

I read the responses/feedback from #3 to 5 and I wonder what you would conclude and arrive at!? It is said one man's meat is another's poison. I read snakes venom is used for treating certain type of cancer. it is medicine in small quantities and same consumed in larger measure it would turn out be poisonous. It is very ticklish question to have a standardized formula.
2. Moderation could vary from person to person and geography to geography.
but be sure your dislike expressed to DH in subtle ways.
3. In a lighter vain, in a WHO report it was mentioned that among the developed Nations, least cardiac problems noticed in France, attributing it to their women drinking in moderation during their pregnancy. This point is mentioned in a snippet
http://indusladies.com/community/threads/pregnant-facts-preponderance-prognostication.304051/
all the best. God Bless Us all.

 

As long as he stays within this moderate limit of once or twice a week, (and stops with 2 pegs each time),it shouldn't be a problem.

 

Dear Sister
But habits die hard! This is not an issue you cross the bridge when you near it.
Thank you. God Bless us All.

 

Why do I cringe at the reference to "pegs"? Ain't that a measure for hooch, daru, and arrack ? Something really low-brow, that is drunk, while holding one's nose, squatting on dirt or a bench, and wait for it to make one's extremities feel numb, and brain function drop to well below normal ?

If the sahib in India, he ought to give up vodka, and take on Gin. A cocktail of gin and tonic water, with a twist of lime/or lemon, would be good during the influenza season in the northern climes of desh. This had been around since before Victoria was our queen. Vodka-tonic does not taste as good. Google for cocktail recipes you can make with vodka.

The ghats south of Mumbai now boast some fine wineries. Some of their wines had made it to the wine shows, and competitions in Europe, and have even got honorable mentions. The price has to come down a little. If the OP household is non-veg eaters, they ought to try serving steak with a full bodied red wine. For vegetarians, there is edamame, bajjis, and samosas.

An extremely easy way to cut down on a husband's drinking amounts, is for the wife to drink half of everything. After all, she signed up to be an equal partner, and not just an observer, or worse yet, a watch dog. Join in, and strike up a conversation. "How was your day, honey?" over a glass of wine would be a good start. Tinkle your glasses to demonstrate that you plan to drink half the stock at home. You cannot let people drink alone. That is one of the reasons a fine bartender is also a good listener.

 

What if the husband starts stocking double so his share is not affected?

In any case, her question isn't "How do I get my husband to share his alcohol with me?"

Your answer is like telling a mom of a son who might be getting high every now & then, "why don't you start smoking pot too? That way you can be friends with him!"