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is premarital sex right?

Discussion in 'Intimacy' started by anurajiv, Jan 7, 2010.

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  1. piscesy2k

    piscesy2k New IL'ite

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    Ushae i also have the same thing to tell you please dont ridicule people based on your own standards..who knows, one day our own near and dear ones may end up violating them because at the end of it it is not in our hands and if we cant bring ourselves to judge them like we have judged everyone we would look like shameless hypocrites..Blind rules are dangerous and people tend to rebel against them...but teaching good and sensible values make people respect us and better themselves

    having extramariatal relations proves that you dont love/respect your partner enough to care about his/her sensitivities...But having pre marital sex is very different from that..People having pre marital relations often get married to each other and i personally dont think that a society is worthy enough to approve a marriage through a wedding or ceremony...marriage happens between the minds of two people..In case of people having sex in a serious relation not being able to live together as husband and wife and decide to move on with their lives, it is essential that they make their future spouses well aware of their past

    Having said that im against casual sex...Im against sex between people who cant be responsible enough to accept and own up to its consequences...there is no such thing as 100% contaceptive and every baby is a boon from god...do not have sex if you dont want babies..Have sex only if you are willing to take the risk and prepared to deliver a baby out of it.
     
    Last edited: Feb 15, 2010
  2. Malavika81

    Malavika81 Bronze IL'ite

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    There is nothing right or wrong about premarital sex. When to have sex is purely a matter of individual decision and liberty.

    But I can tell you this. It is very unnatural for a woman or a man who is 25 or 30 yrs of age not have experienced sex and it is totally against what nature intended. That is how you become a sexually repressed individual.
     
  3. ushae

    ushae Silver IL'ite

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    It is a sweeping statement!! Might be applicable in Europe/US but still not that much in India (even under carpets)

    We see here, in this forum that there are threads which portray the problems/issues faced by some of our members/friends because they had premartial sex.

    Sofar we have not seen a single thread telling that there are problems because they did not have premartial sex
     
  4. mithy232

    mithy232 Silver IL'ite

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    Love doesn't know boundaries...I don't agree with this Western/Indian comparison?! After all we are all human beings and love is common to us all! :)

    I agree with you about the problems that comes along....person with whom you fall in love is very very important.... next comes the depth of it!

    Always girls should to be very careful :hide:
     
  5. Tugga

    Tugga Silver IL'ite

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    What????:??

    Are you really an Indian? I mean Indian origin?

    I accept, there is nothing right or wrong about pre marital sex.. Its a decision of two individuals.

    I too don't agree with Indian/western boundaries, as LOVE doesn't see them. But, just because there are many instances of premarital sex in India or everywhere doesn't mean it is uncommon for a person to wait until his/her marriage (in late 20s) to have their first sex.
     
  6. Malavika81

    Malavika81 Bronze IL'ite

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    Read my statement again. I said it is 'unnatural' not 'uncommon'. Big difference between those two. As human species, nature did not produce us as a species to refrain from sex till you are 25 or 30 years old as a female or a male.

    Sex after marriage is an artificial barrier the Indian society has created for itself doesn't mean it is what is natural.

    Well the problems/issues faced by some members (I have not read anything related to that yet, to be honest) maybe due to lack of formal sex education and taking necessary protection and precautions? I was not born in India and nor did I go to school there so I am not sure how good or bad the sex education in Indian school system is, if at all there is any such thing as Sex Ed in schools in India.


    Yes, I am of Indian origin atleast from my dad's side. How is that relevant or not relevant to this discussion anyways?

    Read my response above. I did not say Uncommon. I said Unnatural.

    If you are having premarital sex, which is very common in most parts of the world as marriage is not a prerequisite to having approved sex in most societies, then you need to be aware of taking precautions and protection from getting pregnant or contracting sexually transmitted diseases. So basically educate yourself on what it entails.
     
  7. ganges

    ganges Gold IL'ite

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    dear,

    I can strongly say that pre marital sex is not right. Whatever explanation you give, finally if anything goes wrong, girl will be the most affected person morally and physically.

    ganges
     
  8. Malavika81

    Malavika81 Bronze IL'ite

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    Well it is up to the individuals to decide what is right or wrong for their personal circumstances.

    As for the physically and morally affected part, I partially agree with the physical part as we are the species that can get pregnant. But proper education and knowledge can overcome that barrier. The moral part is something male dominated societies have imposed on the women for thousands of years and in some societies, sadly it is still in vogue. There is nothing moral or immoral about a grown adult woman engaging in sex and the morality part is a double standard brought forth by men to keep women submissive and subservient to them and keep them as underprivileged citizens of the society. To blindly accept those standards is giving up your rights and individuality and equality as a woman in the society. I have to respectfully disagree on the moral argument.
     
  9. cutesmile09

    cutesmile09 Silver IL'ite

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    I believe that decision on having sex before marriage is upto two individual.Me & My DH dated for 2yrs before marriage and we decided to have sex after our marriage only and we stood by our decision.
     
  10. Tridev

    Tridev Silver IL'ite

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