Is Money The Only Validation Of Living Life Usefully?

Hi @anika987,

When you think of jobs, how do you picture it in your mind? For eg, Do you imagine yourself just learning dance or teaching it to other kids or adults?

I think converting your interest into a job/business depends how far you want to stretch your interest. How many times have you felt "yes am so good at this, I can or I want to provide this service to others"? That should tell you where your inherent interests lie.Monetizing comes later.

First you need to know what you can clearly offer to others which is of some value.

Are you interested in running small business from home?

 

I don’t know why you have written this thread. Money is essential which you have already told. But everything cannot be validated in terms of money. The physical work one does to a family in terms of the care and the love one puts for their family cannot be validated by money. You are doing what lots do but seems deep down you regret not working. Maybe you have these feelings due to your friends or others in your life.

There are plenty of ways one can make money while still being at home. You can make online videos, content writing or do tailoring or online course to teach stitching skills like aari etc and many more. You can teach yoga which you told here. You can even make online videos or take course online for people. You can be a personal trainer at home. Start with one person as a personal trainer and then increase the number. If you need just get some certificate for that and use your skills and earn a living as well. To be honest don’t think that money is not essential when you do any job. Personal satisfaction with any job does require some remuneration. Monetary satisfaction does help you progress. But one shouldn’t just wait for that to happen. You seem to have family situation which prevents you from joining outside work. So utilise your skills to earn from home. Search and you will find answer soon. Good luck.

 

How you would feel about lottery winning ? Would that kind of un"earned" money make you feel uncomfortable ? A well-earning, affectionate husband is a lottery win; we can easily see how very fortunate that is, by reading so many posts of complaints about domestic life, and the abuses suffered.

Leap in a non-leap year, odd month ?

You are good at script writing. Anxiety, personal conflicts, fear, worry, really good stuff.

I would seriously recommend re-examining your ESTATE PLAN between now and September. Read the Laks09 thread, It is all about Money; and the various comments/advisories. Discussing Finances And Wills With Young Adult Children <== This thread has information on HOW TO SAFEGUARD YOUR CURRENT LIFE, or something close to it, for yourself and your children. [ I was, being somewhat superstitious, concerned about all that praise [great guy, respects-me, gives me love and money etc etc.] you heaped on your dH...] -- there is the concept of evil-eyes, and if you believe in that sort of thing, it is best to keep your serenade a notch or two down. Good luck.

 

@anika987 dearie - please calm down...

There are ways to cross this dejection !! Meet a career restart counsellor specialising in careers for women.

I can list out more than 88000 career options - you think at least some options will suit you ??

In my years of counselling, I have helped several women "Restart" their career ... for that they need to be evaluated and do some structured answers and planning... I can help you through PM.

Or if you want to meet someone face-to-face, send me your location in PM, I could suggest someone from my circle...

I have been mentoring a SAHM like you for the past 1 year - while most people I know have lost their jobs - she started with 1000 per month... slowly moved to 10000 ... and this month with my ideas and mentoring and of course her hard work, she is going to be earning at least 50000 .... (I get nothing out of it) ...

We at IL can generate many generic ideas endlessly, but if we want your specific action points, it needs to be one-to-one.

Once we find what your unique characteristics are, and have a concrete goal, there are many counsellors in my career counsellor groups that specialise in helping women make the shift from SAHM to Entrepreneurs...

I think CONCRETE ACTION will give your mind more peace than BROODING about other people...

Keep smiling
HR

 

I have read many of your posts. Amazing person, you are !! What do you eat, drink, for breakfast, lunch, tiffin and dinner? And when do you get time to cook any of those while being the database/encyclopedia for everyone? I am sort of old, but I could not recall a time when I was even half that way at all. Being down-in-a-funk like the OP seems quite normal to me.

Reading the op's posts, I went to reverify the difference between Torpor, Angst and Ennui, at wikidiff site.
Ennui (being French, I suppose) has more synonyms, and approximations than torpor: boredom, tedium, listlessness, lethargy, lassitude, languor, restlessness, weariness, sluggishness, enervation, malaise, dissatisfaction, uneasiness, unease, melancholy, depression, despondency, disquiet ...... and finally there was this: Weltschmerz
I fell off my chair at that.

The age 40+ can bring on a special angst in people..... whether monied or not. Not having had much daytime adult company, the thing that organizational work, or even shift work in assembly manufacturing, can give a person the worry of having missed a lot. Of camaraderie, gossip, news, friendships, learning from others' life's experiences and so forth. However, I know of no job that offers all these without the pain of actually having to do some work.... like moving objects from point-A to point-B, x times a minute, y hours a shift. An ideal job for a person (with money) would be an ID card on a lanyard, reasonable commute to a jobsite that has an excellent lunch canteen. And a mixture of workers who are actually making a living, and others who are there to enjoy the idea of being employed.... for all the other human-contact benefits.

When civilized societies finally get that darn UBI (universal basic income), would everybody feel validated ?

 

@Hopikrishnan ji
I'm a normal SAHM (Stay at home mom) - I chop, cook, wash, clean and do all the work at home. My husband and son are happy with whatever I do (or sometimes dont do)!

Also I'm interested in neither TV, politics, movies and cricket, nor clothes, jewellery and gossip... the topics that most men and women talk to feel accepted in the social context... I have exactly ZERO knowledge in these! I dont have a TV at home and I dont get newspapers delivered .. For the past > 15 years!
So - my time is my own!
And learning, teaching and being knowledgeable about education, careers, health etc is my brahmastra!

Yes, Ennui is the normal way to be for most people ! We all need to constantly remind ourselves of all the things to be grateful for !

@Hopikrishnan ji
You're right about needing daytime adult company!

But not 40+, for me it was early 30s ....

I went through this phase many years back... Being busy with a young kid and house chores and taking care of in-laws health ! It was out of my family's and my own choice!! But You have no time or situations for normal informal adult company!! After a hotshot career travelling around the world, it was difficult to cook, clean, take care of kids and elders, rinse and repeat and listen to all and sundry comments exactly like @anika987 and @Needtobestrong !! Like them, I was also too polite and sanskaari to give back answers!

Thats how I started off... Those days I used to call about 10 little kids home... My own son was 6, so the age range was 3 to 10 year olds... Every friday 5:00 pm they would come, I would tell them stories from the puranas, vedas, itihasas, We would play some games, learn some bhajans, plant a few trees, do some science experiments and maths games... No charges! Everything was FREE...
The moms used to stay back after the class and chat!
It was just an hour's program - but the satisfaction it gave me kept me contented through the week!!
You can check Extras by Women!!!

As my own son grew older (now 17), my interactions changed, my topics of interest changed, my "parents" circle changed, and my knowledge only grew! And now - it is education mentoring and career counselling ... what will it be tomorrow? No one knows... But currently my target group's age range is 3 to 21 and their parents too!!.

We can go through life Complaining and whining OR we can go through life being useful and happy! It is a conscious choice we make!
I prefer to do the latter!

Keep smiling
HR

 

And I did !! Wow...
That first post could easily deserve a warning-advisory: "Don't try it at home without proper training".