Is It Wrong To Serve Food To My Husband?

It’s not wrong.

I wonder what your acquaintance would have said if your husband had served you food? Would she have raised her eyebrows then too?

Whom ever is serving varies within household and many other factors.

 

As a corollary to OP’s apprehension, in the initial days, while I served spouse lunch after she did for me, my dad & mom were looking in the Red in the face as they were not used to such scenes. My mom used to serve entire family and she would alone be sitting on floor to eat from Dad’s elliptical silver plate (after washing).

Why my parents were looking red in the Face?

But when we had separated from parents on account of transfer, within three months of our wedding, spouse & I delighted sitting facing each other to share the food. I serve pappad to both and she serve from opposite end the veggi, I serve rice while she poured cow-ghee into rice pyramids and then we begin breaking the rice pyramid with sambar.

I leave my seat while eating to roast Masala pappad for her while she would (a)wait in anticipation of roasted pappad. Before roasting , a smear of ghee on one face of pappad wiuld be wonderful and I started this way, it has picked up momentum with entire family.

An old conservative lady said to possess evil eye arrived unannounced and questioned my spouse about eating along with husband and roasting pappad with ghee turning poisonous.

Spouse responded to her softly with a smiling face, “you served food to husband and eat afterwards but my husband wants eat with me. What can I do? Wife’s duty is to please husband! What do you say? Here have a sample of this roasted ghee pappad”

Thanks and Regards.
Happy Deepavali

 

Her equation with her husband might be different. My husband doesn't expect me to serve him but he wants me to sit near him and talk when he eats. So that way we spend nice time together. Sometimes I feed my husband as well he likes it very much. My daughters tease me telling you tell us to eat ourselves but you feed Appa. This is not fair ma. One of his friends who came to my place told that I never knew being a housewife you can be happy. I thought only working women can be happy. I was like WTH what sort of comment is this. Should I take it positively or negatively. Then my husband himself told to ignore her stating that she is so immature.

Some women can't take it easily and think that serving husband coffee or meals is slavery. God save them.

We can continue doing what we want.

 

Who is she to tell you what to do? Tell her it is an old habit you picked up in India, you cannot get rid of it and you don't want to get rid of it. She is butthurt and she dragged America into it.
Do whatever keeps you happy. Don't entertain spoilsports.

 

@anika987,

We are all born to serve the family, community, country and the world as a whole. We are not here to be takers scratching the surface of this world to benefit but earn our livelihood by serving. Every life born in this world is there to serve the humanity. By giving and serving, we don’t become inferior. In fact, when we give, our self confidence and self satisfaction will rise. A child born in this world gives happiness to the parents and stands tall reflecting love the parents shower on the child. The teachers are serving the students, the enterprises are serving their customers, the government is serving its citizens, a father in a church serves the seekers, even the President of the United States is serving his people. What is wrong in serving a spouse? Offer to serve is holy unless it is forced on you. It is purely your decision and no visitor has a right to comment on it. It is mere opinion/advice and is of no value to you.