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Is It Really "success" When "morals" Are Compromised?

Discussion in 'General Discussions' started by anika987, Aug 8, 2020.

  1. Mehana

    Mehana Platinum IL'ite

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    Till now I haven't changed myself to be cunning, play politics to achieve something.


    But learnt lot of lessons. I am by myself the way I am but more careful and more focused on my life values.. prioritize things in my life.



    You don't have to be nice all the time, deny help if you think you are being used by other woman for their selfishness, try to have 1-2 friends whom you think better than having more friends thinking about everyone in the circle ...

    I still maintain hi bye to some friends but denied my help saying I am busy...but I have few friends which I feel they are important.

    In this world we have to be smart and we shouldn't lose our things(I had bad experience among friends circle... my mistake I don't no whom should I give importance , same among my kid's mom group, even my close relative)....we have to make sure what we talk to the people whom you think they worthless...we cannot ignore everyone..but we have to be smart....no need to cheat or play politics..but have to be smart and brave...
     
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  2. anika987

    anika987 Finest Post Winner

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    Standing for oneself,being assertive or strong and outspoken that is all morally right ,being a true leader by being smart ,diplomatic is totally fine .Point is when people resort to unfair practices and get success by harming others hardwork or stepping on their hardwork,taking credit for others work,bad mouthing or backstabbing to get the required things..that success is it really a success? Can one be proud to have achieved it that way?
     
    Last edited: Aug 11, 2020
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  3. Novalis

    Novalis Gold IL'ite

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    How about that Steven Wright's comic saying, “A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.” Someone might invent a fix for that aberration for all organs and all beings to co-exist blithely.
     
    Last edited: Aug 12, 2020
  4. Angela123

    Angela123 Gold IL'ite

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    All these are relative from someone else's stand point. if you are asking yourself about something you did and became successful, that is retrospection. And being honest to yourself you will know for sure. But looking at anyone else, you will never know completely why they did something the way they did. It is impossible to completely comprehend for another person to judge. It is like they are the hero and the villain at the same time. One can say 100% that someone back stabbed someone, if you know ALL the truth. Most cases it is she said, he said and third party never have the whole story. Being diplomatic is also one way of playing politics or you can call being smart! There is no one size fits all. Sometimes more ambitious and smarter people move forward very fast (in job and in life) and less competent people accuse them of all of the above said scenarios. That's is why IMO it is hard to judge the "succesfulness" of another person if it is not oneself.
     
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  5. anika987

    anika987 Finest Post Winner

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    If someone does hardwork and there are people taking credit for them,or someone getting physical with another person without liking them just to bag a role,bad mouthing someone coz of “jealousy” and getting them out of the equation,in simple cases like giving preference to people who do not do the work half as good as the right talent and then achieving success..is that a success.They are direct questions.It is not about perspective. Asking about blatant immoral acts.Anyways..am sure in many people’s life we would have felt targeted and our due credit has been taken away.In my opinion,it will be tough to accept that.Would like you hear other perspectives too.
     
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  6. Angela123

    Angela123 Gold IL'ite

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    By doing so and so mean things, if someone has became successful in their eyes or other people, I would still count that as success. that is my short answer. I still have to come across a story that tell otherwise.
     
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  7. anika987

    anika987 Finest Post Winner

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    Allright
     
    Last edited: Aug 12, 2020
  8. candidheart

    candidheart Platinum IL'ite

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    I am experiencing in my job..have personally recommended someone to come into my team, trained the person in depth supported..only later to find that she claimed credit for my hardwork..totally shocked, when confronted she said thats how you need to be smart, grab every opportunity to show case yourself etc (to me that is cunning and immoral)...she was street smart to know what could get her to success in short route and she did just that. she is a manager now..

    I am the type that does the work and my work should speak for itself...only later to realize there are other folks who will blow their trumpet without substance and still climb the ladder by immoral ways and quite people will go unnoticed.

    Favoritism, caste-ism, Attention seeking, bad mouthing or doing Jaldra, bribing in kind,dirty politics etc to be successful is considered as being street smart and shrewd, for those who achieved success through that. They will not consider this as immoral and be happy with their success. Their morals are very different :)

    It is few folks like us who think these are immoral and unethical, will keep fuming and fretting and feel that their success is not real success. It doesn't affect them.

    We stick to our morals and they stick to theirs. Expecting them to have our morals/or realize it is not moral..will only disappoint us! I have learned this the hard way. Yes it hurts!! Feels unfair...it is what it is!
    I am making super slow progress but happy that I don't compromise my values/morals for the so called success!
     
  9. sociallifein30s

    sociallifein30s Silver IL'ite

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    This happened with me once. But the guy did not even acknowledge that he did wrong ... "yea I did it and said that I did it.. whats the problem" is his argument. It all came crashing in a minute. But later during the day, the management to whom he presented it as "his work" said to me in a meeting that "this guy came to me with a proposal. Im sure its under your supervision he has done this. this.. this.. but I had some comments if u can cnsider.. bla bla".
    So, if we work our ass off, almost always, things are on your side. Thats a hope. BUt I was a target of quite backstabbings too. Some I fought and won. Some I lost.

    But having said that, would I favour someone if I have the power, I need to admit that I might favour if I knew someone well enough. If you need to grow, you need to let people grow and get someone under your wings too.
    Because there will be a day when you will need someones help. Bu then, if I favour someone undeserving/incompetent, it might come back to me hard.
    I think there needs to be some balance somewhere.
     
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  10. anika987

    anika987 Finest Post Winner

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    The person who trained you is not street smart but cunning.I admire you for having moved on taking it as a lesson learnt.With all my heart,I feel you are the success here and I mean it.
     
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