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Is Crying A Negative Emotion?

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by Parry22, Mar 5, 2018.

  1. Parry22

    Parry22 Silver IL'ite

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    I always believed all human emotions are natural and we should embrace them (within a limit ofcourse) - being ecstatic, sad or angry is natural and you should accept these feelings.
    Now that i am married, there are times that i cry because of my husband or in laws or being away from mom. And ofcourse husband realises this, and gets upset an keeps saying that crying is such a negative emotion. Don't cry!! I don't want absolutely any tears!! If you cry, our house/family will get distressed because of negativity. Negative emotions attract negative. blah blah blah. I find relief when i cry, i feel much better after a good cry. Plus there are many types of tears, happy tears, movie tears, sad tears - and not all of them are bad. I don't cry like BAHHH BAAHHH , i just have a flow of tears in my eyes. I think you should embrace your tears too. What do you guys think?? Is crying bad?
     
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  2. MonikaSG

    MonikaSG Platinum IL'ite

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    It was my situation few years back. But now I have become strong enough that I don't get any tears in any situation. It took time but once you will start accepting and face the life as it is you yourself will not cry. Crying is bad as other person too get depressed of seeing you crying. So just try to avoid this.
     
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  3. Needtobestrong

    Needtobestrong Platinum IL'ite

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    I feel crying is a natural reaction to sadness or happiness in extremes..
    It's a part of being human.
    Suppressing the feelings in an effort to be brave is not always right.
    Sometimes crying helps release pent up emotions and then u feel better afterwards..of course, those puffy eyes and red nose give away that fact that u cried secretly and would invite many queries from near and dear ones as to what's wrong!!
     
  4. iamsrihere

    iamsrihere Platinum IL'ite

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    I have heard crying releases stress hormones and hence we feel better after crying. Tell your husband not to create situations that make you cry and eventually bring negativity to your home. You cant demand this from inlaws but atleast your husband shouldnt be the reason for your crying if he is very concerned about negativity.
     
  5. GeetaKashyap

    GeetaKashyap IL Hall of Fame

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    Crying, per se, is not a negative emotion. It is a simple emotional reaction. As others said, it helps to release pent up emotions and after a good cry, sometimes you have more clarity. But when one is feeling low, crying for anything and everything is common and this needs some attention from a professional.

    Some women use tears as a weapon and men dread that. They simply do not know how to manage a woman's emotions; they have different mechanisms to deal with their emotions. One of their ways to stop a woman's tears is to add negative meanings to it:)
     
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  6. Sandycandy

    Sandycandy IL Hall of Fame

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    Tell husband to buy you a kala chasma, next time he or his parents make you tear up. What are they upsetting you about ? Crying is not a negative emotion per se but it’s tough to deal or even put forth your point in a discussion when the other person starts crying . All doors of discussion closed . So not healthy in a marriage with a reasonably nice husband when you are trying to sort things out.
    I have to say I have become like Monika , life happens and one becomes strong.
     
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  7. BhumiBabe

    BhumiBabe Platinum IL'ite

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    Crying is not an emotion, so it is neither positive or negative. It is a response to emotions, usually associated with being sad and frustrated, which understandably stresses your husband out. Some people seeing crying as a failure to keep someone happy and satisfied. Regardless, when you cry for some mundane reason, just wave it off, joking that you are just being sentimental or nostalgic. He should be concerned if you are crying because you are profoundly sad and frustrated, and need a shoulder to cry on.
     
  8. DDream

    DDream Finest Post Winner

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    NO. OP, if you think crying makes you feel better cry as much you want. We are human beings, so its natural. Everyone cries for one reason or another. Crying is sometimes a good way to relieve pain or stress, but its use varies from one person to another. But go to your personal space and cry if you can, not in front of others. Try if you can, to control emotions in front of others.

    We have to be practical. Everyone wants to see a happy face or be happy. So tears and sad face can make others sad or frustrated. So crying for each & everything will create an impression that one is weak. So they dont take you seriously. They may even hesitate to tell anything important or serious. It gives the impression that you cry for everything. They even consider it as crocodile tears as some women use it as a weapon.

    So try to accept it. Once you became emotionally strong, the frequency of it will start decreasing. You will be surprised. I like happy tears, crying out of joy or even tears while watching an emotional movie..that wont be a problem for others I guess.
     
    Last edited: Mar 5, 2018
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  9. Priya16

    Priya16 IL Hall of Fame

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    The bottom line is it shouldn't a problem for others.If my daughter cries for something one day, I will try to console her.If he cries for something next day, I will ignore her.The third day, I will ask her to cry in her room.
     
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  10. Penelope

    Penelope Bronze IL'ite

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