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Intercaste Marriage Help

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by pkk1, Aug 19, 2016.

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  1. Aug 19, 2016 #1
    pkk1

    pkk1 New IL'ite

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    Hi all,
    Me n my boyfriend are working together in a company.We both have told our parents about each other last week but my parents are threatening police to my bf and saying that they will send him behind the jail.They started abusing me physically and emotionally.My father wants to talk to his father regarding the matter that keep your boy far from my daughter.The guy is from a low caste and we are brahmin.My bf's father is scared that what if my father will put him into jail.
    They have not done any crime but because of caste issue my father is doing all these things.What should we do?
     
    pkk1, Aug 19, 2016
    pkk1, Aug 19, 2016
    #1
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  2. Aug 19, 2016 #2
    sindmani

    sindmani Platinum IL'ite

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    Sorry for ur situation. Can u talk to any of ur close relative who can understand ur love.can u get help from ur friends to convince ur parents. I not confident that ur parents will understand even if someone convinces them that more than caste or religion understanding and love is important in a marriage. But u can try. Hope all becomes well for u.
     
    sindmani, Aug 19, 2016
    sindmani, Aug 19, 2016
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  3. Aug 19, 2016 #3
    pkk1

    pkk1 New IL'ite

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    Hi sindmani,
    I don't want to talk to any of my relative as I know no one will support me and they all including my parents are very orthodox.My father is emotionally blackmailing me that they will suicide if this will happen.And my mother is saying if you marry by our choice we will always support you even if the guy is not good but if you marry yourself no one will support you.I sometimes think to run away from home because of their drama but at times I think of my parents that they will suffer in front of society.
     
    pkk1, Aug 19, 2016
    pkk1, Aug 19, 2016
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  4. Aug 19, 2016 #4
    sindmani

    sindmani Platinum IL'ite

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    Op, What about ur Friends.can u talk about ur lover's good character. Can u quote the positive points
     
    sindmani, Aug 19, 2016
    sindmani, Aug 19, 2016
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  5. Aug 19, 2016 #5
    GoogleGlass

    GoogleGlass IL Hall of Fame

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    for some reason or other love marriages are like that.

    both of you should be very strong to sail through all oppositions. emotional, cultural, family, social threats will be there. you can go to a police station and get married. but before that both of you should discuss all problems that would come and how to face them.

    simplest solution might be to leave as it is, do not discuss with parents or try convincing them. both of plan well, if you can get a transfer opt for it and move out of your place. let him get a transfer later and join you. to convince parents say you are opting for the transfer to forget the love.

    when things settle down after the transfer, get married there. poor love it doesn't know the complications and it strikes and after falling in love, the brain starts working and justifies the family related issues. too late. it is for you to decide whether to keep your heart happy or brain happy.

    discuss well with your boyfriend and make the right move. all the best.
     
    GoogleGlass, Aug 19, 2016
    GoogleGlass, Aug 19, 2016
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  6. Aug 19, 2016 #6
    GoogleGlass

    GoogleGlass IL Hall of Fame

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    this is not to hurt you as well.

    have you just woken up from the vedic ages???
     
    GoogleGlass, Aug 19, 2016
    GoogleGlass, Aug 19, 2016
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  7. Aug 19, 2016 #7
    GoogleGlass

    GoogleGlass IL Hall of Fame

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    i never knew sai baba was against love marriage especially between a brahmin and a non-brahmin.

    all of us are materialistic including yourself, how did you exclude yourself? when you are an ardent possessor of the brahministic/vedic materialistic mindset???
     
    GoogleGlass, Aug 19, 2016
    GoogleGlass, Aug 19, 2016
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  8. Aug 19, 2016 #8
    pkk1

    pkk1 New IL'ite

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    Hi,
    My friends always take back in these stuations.Me and my bf are just scared of police .what if my parents will send my bf behind the jail.They are not ready to listen anything.My mother started crying saying that why did you find a boy from a low caste,what will happen to our reputation if this happen.My father just keep on threatening my bf for police and saying that I will ruin your career if u will not stay away from my daughter.He wants to take a stand for me but on the other side he is afraid of police.
     
    pkk1, Aug 19, 2016
    pkk1, Aug 19, 2016
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  9. Aug 19, 2016 #9
    GoogleGlass

    GoogleGlass IL Hall of Fame

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    oh my goodness i just realized that all the sil, mil, dil, fil, bil, spouse poblem threads here in IL is all from those who had love marriages :):):)
     
    GoogleGlass, Aug 19, 2016
    GoogleGlass, Aug 19, 2016
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  10. Aug 19, 2016 #10
    GoogleGlass

    GoogleGlass IL Hall of Fame

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    both of you discuss and make up your mind first. then be worried of others and how to tackle them.
     
    GoogleGlass, Aug 19, 2016
    GoogleGlass, Aug 19, 2016
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    kaniths, jskls and KashmirFlower like this.
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