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Inlaws trouble- plz help

Discussion in 'Relationship With In-Laws' started by nhs143, Aug 2, 2015.

  1. nhs143

    nhs143 New IL'ite

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    Ok ladies. Its been 1.7 months i am married n like everyone i have issues wid my inlaws.
    My husband works abroad n is out of india for 7-8 months. So it shud ideally be me n my mil. But sil who has a house in same complex is always at my house wid her husband n kid.
    Its very irritating but i cant say anything.
    My problem is if v ever go to sil house she doesnt like me entering her kitchen n she keeps telling me u leave i wil do it. N den she comes here n enters our kitchen. Mil n sil plan wat to cook n all dey dont even ask or inform me. I do cleaning work of d house. Sil's husband n kid also stay here n go to her house only at night.
    I am fond of cooking n did it few times but my work schedule doesnt let me cook daily so i was planning to cook only on weekends. Sil n mil r not working so whole day at home.

    My DH was chatting wid me last week n told me to learn to cook as he wants me to cook for him....i told him that even i want to cook but this is how things are. So he said dont cook now cook wen i come.
    MIL remembers me wen any bills have to be paid but other times she doesnt bother abt me.

    I have below 2 options which one to choose plz help

    1. Let mil n sil cook til when my husband is back i wil cook for him
    2. Cook evry weekend along wid doing all other cleaning work



     
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  2. Grihani

    Grihani Gold IL'ite

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    Girl, in many homes they don't care if the DIL is working, has time or not they expect her to cook, clean and do everything perfectly, consider yourself lucky that you dony have to struggle everyday.

    If you really want to make something, just tell them you are making a particular dish that day, let them make the rest. It is your house too, you dont need their permission.If your husband likes that you cook, just go ahead and do it when he's there, if you want to cook during weekends, just do it, why think so much ? If they say something, just say you love to cook, don't want to stop that.
     
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  3. Ragini25

    Ragini25 Platinum IL'ite

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    Your DH is lucky that he married a girl who likes to cook :)
    There are some who dont like to cook, and then its a different issue.
    Just go ahead and cook whenever you want on the weekend, its your kitchen as well. No need to think its not our kitchen, once we move in as DIL, its our place too, we should recognize that.
     
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  4. AprilLisa

    AprilLisa Gold IL'ite

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    Go for Option 1, and enjoy their cooking, just once in a while, formally ask if they need your help. If you want to cook some dish just say so, "You have been working so hard, today I want to make something for you all".

    When you are at SIL's, be her guest, no need to enter her kitchen, just ask what you need.
     
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  5. pear

    pear Gold IL'ite

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    You have a set of MIL-SIL who love to cook for themselves &you...............Wow! better not to complain about a gift horse.:coffeeRelax and enjoy thier service .If you want to try a recipe go ahead when you get time(do your own purchases for ingredients).

    You could learn some of your dhs favorites from his mom.Use this opportunity to gel up with MIL .........nothing pleases a MIL (&dh) more than the DIL requesting her to teach her recipes(it still works for me).

    Yeah agreed its irritating to have that SILs family daily.But its not going to be easy dealing with your lonely MIL with your dhs absence.So feel lucky to have your SIL to dilute your MILs attention.And again when your dh returns ,dont be fool enough to take whole control of the kitchen.Just learn the art to do the occasional special recipes and be in lime light.
     
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  6. Iamagoodgirl

    Iamagoodgirl Platinum IL'ite

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    Its not about cooking its much more about controlling your own house and life.
    My mil and sil did same to me.They ran the show and then go telling everyone behind my back that i am lazy ,irresponsible.I dont do anything.

    Take the control.But be prepare for hard work if they start no co operation movement against you.

    1 wake up before mil and enter kitchen.Plan menu previous night and exquisite it in minimal time.
    2 if she says something tell her you need rest.If sil says something tell her you have to take care of your own home why do you extra work here also.Go sit in hall i will prepare for you.
    3 make mil is busy.Figure out what she likes.Mention her relatives to call her at their home for change.If relatives are not interested send her to trips with FIL.
     

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