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Inlaws got Dress for son's first birthday

Discussion in 'Relationship With In-Laws' started by Fortune1, May 15, 2015.

  1. Fortune1

    Fortune1 Senior IL'ite

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    Hi

    I have a 10 months old son and living in USA. My inlaws are here for 6 months. I have my own share of problems with my inlaws and things were not good in the past. But am studying now and they have visited us to take care of my son. It has been a power play since they came here. They want dominate over everything related to my son. But I ignore all petty things and have my say only on important things like food matters for son which also I do cordially. Things have gone very smooth till now as I keep quiet and take care of them as much as I can as I feel grateful as they are helping me with my DS. Even if not for my son I have grown very immune to their talks and now I balance everything well. My DS birthday falls in the end of the month. We are planning to celebrate it big. I have many things in my mind for him. But while coming from India, my inlaws have bought a dress for my son to wear it for the occasion. In the past also they have bought him clothes which I am very appreciative of. But for this occasion, I strongly feel that I and my husband should get him outfit for him to wear while cutTinG Cake.am ok to make him wear their dress before or later on that day...is my thinking wrong....my husband says that he should wear only the dress got by his parents....tell if my thinking is fair or I am expecting too much....
     
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  2. sunshine1970

    sunshine1970 Gold IL'ite

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    It may be petty, but I can see that it is a big deal to you, I too would want to decide what my son wears, maybe change his outfits some time through out the party so both people are happy and let your DH and IL know that you will be doing that.
     
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  3. yellowmango

    yellowmango IL Hall of Fame

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    Make him wear grandparents dress in the morning.Take him to the temple or do a little puja at home only.Let him wear it the whole day.Take plenty of pictures with grand parents and husband . Put it on facebook and show them.

    Change his clothes for the party as it will need to be changed.....
     
  4. Rihana

    Rihana Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    :) Agree with sunshine. One person's petty can be another's big deal.

    Your thinking is fair and you are expecting too much. :)
    Expecting that husband or in-laws will honor your preference is unrealistic.

    With time, you'll learn to get such things accomplished quietly, with minimal announcement and minimal approval seeking of husband.

    With time, you'll also be grateful if someone gets the birthday dress, since you are too busy to get it yourself.

    For first b'day, chances are child will be sleepy at cake cutting time. Chances are also that child needs a dress change just minutes before cake-cutting since accidentally-on-purpose juice falls on it. :wink:
     
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  5. Jas8085

    Jas8085 Gold IL'ite

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    say "yes" and then spill a bit of milk or food on it while feeding the baby.

    (yes, i became a wolf after dealing with my over smart inlaws)
     
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  6. Rise

    Rise Platinum IL'ite

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    make kid wear parents given dress... thn feed him some food and drop some food or drink on his dress, remove and say ..ohhoo ur dress became dirty,amma change your dress... and put the dress you bought for baby and cut cake.

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY to your baby

     
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  7. PavithraS

    PavithraS Platinum IL'ite

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    Now who is smart ? :rotfllaugh1smiley
     
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  8. PavithraS

    PavithraS Platinum IL'ite

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    @jas8085 and @Rise

    Great minds think alike ...laugh1smiley
     
  9. jaden

    jaden Gold IL'ite

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    **
    Was thinking the exact ..;)
     
  10. keethi

    keethi Silver IL'ite

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    Hi ,

    You can better do this way ..

    But lot of thinking for small things makes our mind tired like this because of our elders. .. all the best ..
     

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