Influencers

The great saint Adi Sankaracharya said, “Satsangha Twe nishanga twam, Nisangha twe nirmoha twam, Nirmoha twe nischala ta twam, Nischala ta twe Jivanmukti” meaning “When you are in good company, you are not in bad company, when you are not in bad company, you don’t fall into delusion, when you don’t fall into delusion, the mind becomes steady and when the mind becomes steady, you are liberated”.

This sounds very simple to understand but very complex to practice. It also shows the depth of wisdom of the great saint. By nature, human beings tend to belong to a tribe. We tend to acquiesce to the group that reflects our principles and values. However, the first and foremost choice is to belong to a group where we feel secured and protected. Risk-taking to move out of the cocoon to expose ourselves to our negative aspects is rare. Where does this sense of insecurity come from? Why is it important for us to belong to a tribe? Our mind creates an imaginary Geo-fence around us as though we are in the security of the home. Most social gatherings have become a place to discuss about the intelligence of either ourselves or our children. This creates significant emotional imprint in our minds. Our mind is afraid of criticism but very receptive to the words of praise. It gets intoxicated by the repeated words of appreciation and likes to be under the influence of such praises failing to grow further into unknown territories. Instead of expanding our mind to reach out to more and more people to increase our interaction, we become comfortable to be in the security of select few be it our own family, our community and our standard social-gatherings.

Take me for example. Before I started writing in IL, I spent six months whether I could venture into IL or not. After that, I created my cocoon to write my own blogs before I started writing regularly in IL. Even when I started writing, I was looking to write only in snippet section where I had people who are very supportive of me. I was very afraid of giving my opinion away in Relationship, Education & Personal Growth forums. I behaved as though I kept one leg into the water to check the current before I jumped into the river to enjoy swimming. If I had broken this barrier sooner, I would have had the great company of many learned people in these wonderful forums. Frankly, when I read relationship forum, I figured out how many women who were in troubled waters for a prolonged period have successfully come out of it with sheer courage and self-belief. They stood up for themselves by learning out of their own experiences.

Frankly feeling secured in a group of people itself is a delusion. Many have used this tribal mentality very successfully for political or other social gains. For example, I honestly believe tribal mentality of minority of Americans gave the electoral college victory and put Donald Trump into the White House as the President. Even in India, fanning the feelings of religious people who weren’t rational thinkers resulted in giving PM Modi the majority in the Parliament. The opposing party was corrupt is another question altogether. It is the sense of insecurity of the Germans that Adolf Hitler used to become an indisputable leader and a dictator who tried to conquer the entire world.

Discriminating mind that can evaluate the social behavior of others and our own reaction to such social behavior will never be afraid of anything. It will take our emotional mind that feels the sense of insecurity out of it and create a sense of belonging and togetherness with the entire world. The mind that is rigid with its own principles and values, recognizing a group of people or community as its own cocoon would never learn anything new. Our mind must be trained to change constantly to adapt to changing environment. There is enough mechanism in our body and mind to ring the alarm bell if we are in a real dangerous environment and there is no need to create artificial barriers in our mind.

There is no question that we need to regulate ourselves to the social needs of the society and comply with all the laws of the land. But we don’t have to restrain ourselves with a chain to belong to a tribe. Freedom and liberation is not sanctioned by anyone but acquired by our own mind. When we unlock the barriers and open our mind to expose it to the new environments, there is so much of fun waiting for us. The euphoria we experience when we have a sense of belonging to the entire environment is inexplicable. When we melt in nature, enjoy the company of animals, like praying to a name or form, let us train our mind also to expand to see togetherness of all human beings around us through the lens of love. It liberates our mind totally making it wide open to learning new things.

 

Dear Smt. Jayasala:

Thank you as always for your invaluable feedback. Yes. There are so many benefits in comradeship with fellow beings in our own group. The collective wisdom of more than one could have far reaching advantages in life when compared to individual thinking. As you rightly pointed out, one needs to derive a constructive balance.

The company of good people do bring great value to our own principles and values and the church-going habits make one help develop favorable attitude towards humanity. However, the sheepish tendencies also bring some difficult social habits that are hard to break. Sometimes, it makes one's mind very rigid with no constructive and individual thinking to discriminate. I just brought that aspect of the issue to the forefront in this introspection. Many Gurus including Adi Shankara have suggested that we need to make our own inquiry before practicing the teachings. Once the concept is embedded in our system with self-inquiry, it becomes more powerful. There is nothing wrong in being in a group but we need to explore the world outside of the group to make our mind learn new things. Expansion of mind with the open attitude to listen to new ideas, stimulate our mind significantly. Even when the corporations belong to their association, when they go to the market, everyone asks them to differentiate their products and services.

Keeping an open mind, listen to new views and being ready to change are important traits one needs to possess to break the barriers of growth. That is my humble opinion.

Viswa

 

Dear Sri Thyagarajan:

Very well said. The social media and television are great influences in our lives. The companies like Google, Apple and Facebook are now talking about what they call as "Attention Economy". They believe, the future of the eCommerce is dependent on social media interaction of the people who interact with each other.

That is why I gave example of 2016 US election. The bots from Russia influenced a few minds in pockets of the US who were already unhappy and had sense of insecurity about their future to tilt the electoral college in favor of a specific candidate.

Our social behavior is becoming predictable and sometimes unacceptable for future growth. I am not suggesting no one should be in a group but should also use one's discrimination to think independently and voice against social issues even if it comes from the majority.

Viswa

 

Dear Syamala:

You know I always welcome your responses whether I write a snippet in philosophy or not. It is not my understanding either that Shankaracharya mentioned about belonging to the tribe as a good practice. He clearly said one should have good company and it is the human mind that misunderstands it as the company of a group in which one feels the sense of security. I was only analyzing how the mind refuses to accept criticism and look for words of praise always and hence find it difficult to venture into new territories.

I am not saying that most are not individual thinkers. They do think independently even though they are part of the group. But group behavior considerably influence the mind of the individual without us realizing it whether a particular aspect is good or bad.

If you carefully review the entire snippet including the title, it is about the influencers of our mind and therefore, the last paragraph has some relevance to the topic. How good a person would be if one is a regular church-goer, loves nature and animals but doesn't recognize the sufferings/needs of the fellow beings? In fact, many spiritual teachers are advising that the hands that serves is holier than the lips that prays. If one faces some bad social habits in a group, one should be able to stand up to point that out. I spend ton of money to get my daughter married because that is what the entire society did. This is despite most religious and spiritual leaders suggesting to conduct wedding in a simpler fashion. If I am a parent of a young man, I expect the bride's family to do all wedding expenses and let the girl get accustomed to the practices of the bridegroom's family. How many will ask about the family practices of the bride? Even in social media, if one is slightly naive in expressing her thoughts, others bully her so much resulting in her morale being destroyed to write. These kind of ganging up should be strictly avoided. Whether it is social get together or social media group, one should not consider them as demonstration of the intelligence but as an opportunity to make friends and learn from one another.

These are the social habits that one needs to break in order to change own embedded and hardcore habits that are not desirable. In order to grow to the new levels, the mind should discriminate the right from wrong. Healthy discussions even if they are conflicting should be welcomed in order to make a step in the right direction. If we prepare our mind to change, we give a chance to ourselves to enter into new territories that would remove our delusions about the security. These are my humble views out of my own experiences.

Viswa

 

Dear Sabitha,

What a deep thinker you are and it is really a pleasure reading your feed backs! It is really liberating to have an open mind and use as much discrimination as possible to derive a near perfect answer. As you rightly pointed out Shankara and Patanjali are suggesting us to inquire and steady the mind on a regular basis. Conflicting views echos in our mind often with the chatter and when we clarify them like the way we churn the yogurt to get butter out of it, we see the value of such discrimination. Yes. It is hard to be constantly maintain that state of mind. Trying and not giving up to do that is the most important process. I have not read Political Tribes or Tiger Mother but heard of Tiger Mother before.

Thank you for sharing the videos and I enjoyed seeing the first one but yet to see the second. There is nothing wrong in belonging to a group but we should still use our discrimination to avoid conformity to something that we are socially trying to break.

Invaluable response, as always.

Viswa