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Indusladies Will You Let Me Delete My Account? This Is Scary Than Cambridge Analytica Identity Theft

Discussion in 'Relationship With In-Laws' started by lukywife, Apr 22, 2020.

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  1. Rihana

    Rihana Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    A warning message like that before each new thread gets created would mean, at least in my case, that more than half the threads don't get created.

    Your request for deactivation was not granted. You have since come back and posted with the same account. If the reason was dire enough and beyond a generic "to safe guard my relationships", your first step of action would be to stop posting in the site.

    I don't want to elaborate here on ways of getting a "close enough alternate" to posts or account deletion as that would obviously be counter-productive, but starting threads on the issue or sharing private message/conversation in a thread is surely not the way to go about it.

    sbonigala, I am a fan of your posts and draw inspiration from what you have shared with us. I don't mean to be rude or unsympathetic. If any content in my posts is objectionable or hurtful, please click-report to admins. After a short stint as a moderator and an experience of what a royal headache that job can be, I try not to contest any edit/delete or move of my posts or threads.
     
  2. sbonigala

    sbonigala Platinum IL'ite

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    Are you saying the posts should be here to make the site worth visiting, even though families are broken because of the posts being here?

    Fiction work is very very different from a women discussing her husband's asexuality with strangers online. How can you compare these two things is beyond my understanding.
    You may convince your potential employer about our fiction work being present on another site but you can never fix a marriage thats broken because of sensitive issue being made public. Most women who post here are naive and do not understand the repercussions of their post online.
    Comparing their issues with some fiction work is not right.


    If the intent is to genuinely help the the women who want to remain unknown or who want to delete their personal details, its not too difficult to sit with a UX(User Experience specialist) and define the process flows and user journeys.

    You might have never posted anything about your personal life here. Good on you. Honestly I say that.
    Rihana, I really enjoy reading your threads and contribute where I can. I find your threads creative and easy to relate to. But its not about you and I.
    There are women who would have posted in panic or posted while in anxiety attack or soon after a fight with H. Such posts contain LOT of sensitive things about the family , the H, the kids and SIL etc. Such posts cause long term damage to people.
    My argument is for such women.
    I posted one thread about my in-laws. But never ever after that.
    As fellow women lets understand such women's plight after realising that they can do nothing about their posts, nor their usernames, nor their membership here but to stop logging in.
    Lets not talk as if everything here is right and is here for a reason.
    No matter how much we enjoy this website, Indusladies is a business at the end of the day. This is not online help centre as it portrays at times.
    This business relies on the posts made by fellow women(majority) and men. Relationship forum is the major chunk of the business and hence grabs most of its visitors.
    My take on this business is - Its inhuman to not allow people to delete their posts or change the usernames(even though their life is in turmoil and family is on the verge of breaking up) because that will effect the business model.
     
  3. sbonigala

    sbonigala Platinum IL'ite

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    I made my point here.
    I choose not to respond any more on this because how much ever we talk , discuss and post - am not sure there is going to be any change in the policy or the way things are implemented.

    Just a reminder though
    Once your post is out there - it's written in rock - you can't do anything about it.
    If your problem is really sensitive - see a professional in person rather than posting it online where there is a record of every word you used!
     
    Last edited: Apr 22, 2020
  4. Mistt

    Mistt IL Hall of Fame

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    Recently, I had observed that one of active member's screen name was changed. I think she was requested to change her username.
     
  5. GoneGirl

    GoneGirl Gold IL'ite

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    Nice discussion, I have been tempted so many times to post a reply saying. Whoa that’s loads of personal information in a controversial post, so be careful about it.

    I do see both sides of the problem. I wish this forum (as some other forums) would allow users to post certain post as an anonymous user, so they don’t have to create another id when they have a personal problem, so that they can post under their original id but need not be worried about getting identified by their other posts.
     
    Last edited: Apr 22, 2020
  6. Mistt

    Mistt IL Hall of Fame

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    Wow! My recent post was gone. :mask:
     
  7. SinghManisha

    SinghManisha Platinum IL'ite

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    Thanks for bringing this to our attention @lukywife and @sbonigala. This is concerning.
    There is no doubt that Indus Ladies has a business model and they need posts and users to maintain that. They also have decoy “employees” that keep the forum alive.
    The business aspect aside, a user should have the choice of deleting their accounts. Even Facebook lets you do that.
     
  8. shravs3

    shravs3 IL Hall of Fame

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    Yes other similar forums allow that
     
    yellowmango, Anusha2917 and mangaii like this.
  9. Caughtinbetween

    Caughtinbetween Gold IL'ite

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    Oh ok so its gone ... i was wondering what happened where did it disappear in a blink of an eye while i login to reply :grinning: but I had also noticed the change you mentioned and was surprised for a bit at that time .
     
  10. sbonigala

    sbonigala Platinum IL'ite

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    LOL !! Well ,that says something, doesn't it?
    Wasn't your post about username change being allowed for a user?
    I wont be surprised if this post is vanished too !!

    But the moderator RelModerator was last seen a few years go ? Or Is that actually a New ILite ??
    Capture1.PNG

    So, who would have deleted your post? Some other staff member maybe !
     
    Mistt and mangaii like this.
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