In Laws Irritating And Forcing Me To Travel

put your foot down . this is not time to travel.

if they keep nagging you, put some headphones and block their words. sorry this sounds silly but sometime even if we ignore mentally , those words surface after sometime and hurt. do not go in circles for replying back and forth.

what is your spouse doing. i really find this ridiculous, dependency on maid. usa i and my spouse handle work, kids and house work. why is this not possible in india. you need equal support from him .

 

Talk to yourself...

Ask yourself few questions like

How my life is going?

What good I had done to myself today?

Did I laughed a single moment through out the day?

Do I need to live like this?

What makes me happy?

Why I always have to think about them?

Do I have something else to do?

Stand in front of mirror and try to smile. Dress up nicely.
Make something to eat of your choice.
Think positive about yourself.
If you will smile you can make others smile too.
Try not to give your negative reactions.
Change your expressions even if you are angry. Don't show them.
Read some holy books.
Pray as much as you can.
Watch regional channels.
Listen to bhajans and aarti whenever possible.
Tell your negative thoughts to go away without entering into you.
Think about yourself before marriage. How you was..? How you used to enjoy each moment at that time.
We all need to be strong. I tried to make maximum possible points that I always do. These things start working more effectively with experience. Just keep trying. May we all get the strength to fight back.

 

Dear @Needtobestrong hang in there. Its going to take longer to get this pandemic to settle down. They should be happy and grateful of atleast they are getting required groceries when need when people are dying of hunger.
Encourage your inlaws to follow a scheduled daily routine, if they are interested in playing card games get them that, or if they have any hobbies like knitting, bead work, block printing, or online games for elders or enroll them to some online groups.
Try to explain them both your husband,kid need internet, plus your kid need any item or material for project/activities you cannot run back and forth, its hard to bring everything to natives to entertain you and your kid. Follow a simple meal chart daily and let everyone know that you are no going to do anything more than this chart, if they need anything they have to do it themselves, everybody has to wash own cups and plates, even if they cook and make messy kitchen don't bother for few days and relax.
Have fresh mint tea or lemon tea to get headache relief and place cold pack on neck. Lots of hugs to you.

 

Right now u need to eat well as lack of good food can also trigger irritation more.

Eat normally without counting calories and just avoid fried,junk and processed foods.try doing intermittent 16:8 fasting.

you should see results.

Anyways don’t worry about weight or food now and hope all should become well and probably your inlaws are indirectly hinting they are bored and want to leave to their native place!

 

It is somehow much easier to do housekeeping in US even without cleaners. Things don’t get as dusty or dirty, machines and tools are much better and most Indian homes don’t have dishwashers. People also understand that they can’t depend on maids and somehow everyone pitches in to help.
In India I remember the sink was always full of vessels no matter if there was 1 person or 20 in the house. Elders are also particular about meals, tea, coffee, tiffin, changing clothes several times a day etc and often will not lift a finger to help if the DIL is around. Even if the husband wants to help his parents will often disapprove and many don’t want to rock the boat. Husbands also change their behavior when parents are around.
I can sympathize with OP as I have seen this exact same situation play out many times.

 

So they do know what is going on there. Then as u said, nagging is due to the feeling of disappointment to stay indoor for a long time. It's kind of understandable but not tolerable. My toddler of 2 year old asks us to take her bicycle ride every single day which we did allow her in Feb month when there is not much cases in our city.
Initially I thought they are so ignorant about the situation(definitely not innocent like a child). I was wrong.
But its gonna eat you up if thos nagging continues, as you are already tirelessly trying to do the best u can.
Buying fresh groceries issue from them - I totally understand this as this was the reason for me to move out of my parents last year.
Elders sometimes behave like children, not adjusting but naggin or complaining inappropriately with the situation

You can try giving some work not explicitly but implicitly. Like casually throwing garlic pods and make them peel or folding clothes after laundry. Making them busy might have them less chance to nag u.

If this dint work out, keep yourself busy (i know already u r busy with house chores but I mean something for your personal growth, u do this as well but like a clockwork, scheduled thing) like by enrolling yourself to a course online.
Or say u have this imaginary enrolled course and escape to a room and put on music to relax yourself. Win - win,

Right now living a simple life in India by itself has become like a huge task, on top of it wondering what and all we need to do to keep our sanity.
Take care of ur health OP.

 

Just smile and say “I’m good here, thank you. I like being in my own house during these times”. These folks are pushing your boundaries. You need to make it clear to them where your boundaries are. Going along is only going to embolden them.

 

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take care of your health. Ignore them. keep yourself busy. use earphones. lockyourself in another room. sorry i cant help much. I have my mil here and there's no sign of her going. I am turning into a person i can't recognize and i hate it. this is not me