[font=verdana, geneva, helvetica] How to Detect a Two-Way Mirror [/font]HOW TO DETECT A 2-WAY MIRROR When we visit bathrooms, hotel rooms, changing rooms, etc., how many of you know for sure that the seemingly ordinary mirror hanging on the wall is a real mirror, or actually a 2-way mirror (i.e. they can see you, but you can't see them)? There have been many cases of people installing 2-way mirrors in female changing rooms. It is very difficult to positively identify the surface by just looking at it. It's time to get paranoid. So, how do we determine with any amount of certainty? Just conduct this simple test: Place the tip of your fingernail against the reflective surface and if there is a GAP between your fingernail and the image of the nail, then it is a GENUINE mirror. However, if your fingernail DIRECTLY TOUCHES the image of your nail, then BEWARE, for it is a 2-way mirror! So if not at home and changing before a mirror, do the "fingernail test". It doesn't cost you anything. It is simple to do, and it might save you from getting "visually raped"! Share this with your girlfriends.
Parenting Your Parents Parenting Your Parents ‘Respect your elders’ is what we are all brought up with and often, we tend to define our Indianness with this maxim. But what does this mean? Does it mean indulging them their idiosyncrasies? Or venerating them even when we have a hard time dealing with some of their foibles? Or grinning and bearing it when they pamper our children? Or remaining cheery when they insist on treating us like adolescents though we are 30-something. If we look closely and honestly at our relationships with our parents, we will be forced to realise that we behave with them either as we did when we were children or we end up parenting them in their old age. Rarely ever do we treat them like adults... Enhance The Dynamic Rather than bemoan the decay of the joint family at the local cocktail party or in letters to the editor, our time would probably be better spent if we devoted some energy to enhancing the dynamics and communication patterns of the surviving vestiges of the joint family system. Today, the average family, more often than not, comprises a married couple, their children and the husband’s parent(s), all living together in a not-always-companionable equation. For such a unit to not merely survive, but also serve as an emotional bedrock, all its members will have to co-exist in a state of mutual respect, engaging in a mutually beneficial relationship of openness, honesty, understanding, tolerance and regard for each others’ needs, boundaries and limitations. So let us not confine ourselves to the two extremes of vilification or deification. Let us start actively searching for a middle ground. Let us learn to respect our parents as adults. It’s not as difficult as one might imagine. Here’s what the process would entail. Dumping Our Emotional Baggage: The characteristic that distinguishes the parent-child from other relationships is that a long road has been traversed that is often littered with unresolved issues, unfulfilled expectations and emotional pain. Let us accept that this has happened to pretty much all of us, simply because our parents are imperfect people and received no training and had access to even less inputs than we are fortunate to have when it came to honing parenting skills. Our parents had to learn on the job and often made a bit of a hash with the first-born, got a little better at it with the second one and usually spoilt the third one silly trying to undo their earlier ‘mistakes’. It is the non-acceptance of this imperfect reality that causes most of the problems in relating with our parents. For denial results in suppressed resentment and all its attendant complications. Which means we end up getting stuck with our baggage rather than being able to dump it. Accepting it and recognising the ubiquity of this phenomenon helps us to get away from the ‘Why Me?’ victim position and we realise that our parents did the best they could under pressing circumstances. This helps us to value the good they’ve given us and helps us relate to them as persons and as individuals. Preventing The Accumulation Of Fresh Baggage: Sorting out the past alone is not enough. We need to make sure that our present and future is configured in such a manner that we don’t pick up fresh baggage. This would mean learning how to assert our own needs to our parents without feeling bad or guilty, getting them to respect our boundaries and private spaces even as we learn to respect theirs, and responding to them with love not amounting to adoration, respect not amounting to reverence, and interdependence not amounting to either independence or over-involvement. Since most of our parents have not developed alternative roles to play other than the parental role, this might mean facilitating their involvement in other activities thereby enhancing their universes. Learning To Respect our Parents’ Need For Companionship: What our parents need so badly as they grow older is the companionship of younger adults. Not constantly, but every now and again. It keeps them feeling young, keeps their minds alive and their intellects stimulated. Discuss not just the ‘necessary’ things — family events, children-related matters and the like — but also issues in other areas — their world view, for instance. You may well be surprised that you hardly know what views your parents hold on issues (unless they are the sorts that hold forth). So this entails a process of ‘getting to know’ who your parents really are. Learning To Respect our Parents’ Needs For Privacy: As a culture, we do not place a great premium on privacy, but all human beings do have a need every now and again to be left alone. We each signal this need differently. Some of us bury ourselves in a book; some go for long walks; some go off to the temple. Rarely do we articulate it as a need for private time. We need to learn how to do is to tune into our parents’ signalling patterns for privacy and learn how to respect and respond to them without feeling rejected. Learning To Respect our Parents’ Need For Independence And Autonomy: When we fall into the trap of parenting our parents, we start thinking of them as dependents and feel the need to anticipate and respond to their every need. Some parents like this, even demand it. But in my experience, most parents do not like being cosseted all the time. Every now and again is fine, but not all the time. They feel the need for their experience to be respected and for some autonomy, particularly when it comes to personal decision making. For instance, if your parents say they would like to live independently, we should learn to accept it gracefully and not worry that we would be thought of as ungrateful children. Work Towards The Best Balance In short, the key to respecting our elders lies not in ‘serving’ them, but in relating to them with dignity as individuals, as companions and as one adult to another. Remember how you envied some people whose parents were their friends? Now is the time you can make this happen in your home too. Just remember the axiom: Neither a vilifier nor a deifier be. Support, don’t steer, your parents in the winter of their lives
Give Life's Events Some Perspective - Write Them Down <arttitle></arttitle>Give Life's Events Some Perspective - Write Them Down At A Glance • Journaling will help you keep track of your life • Journaling can help your make sense of everyday happenings • Journaling can help you change the course of your life You can rewrite the events of your daily life Keeping a journal is a wonderful way of charting and mapping life’s journey, of keeping a record of personal thoughts, feelings, experiences and activities. And it’s easy. All you need is a pen, paper, a little of your time and some effort and you have your very own friend, philosopher and guide. Know Yourself Journaling lets you see the pattern of your activities, emotions, moods and thoughts. It makes you introspect and understand. When things go wrong, you can ask yourself what triggered a particular reaction — why you lost your cool, why you yelled at a loved one, what is the transgression limit of your comfort zone? Keeping a journal lets you address all these issues with complete honesty. Words Linger On We meet different people and face different situations all the time. Each day brings forth new lessons and new understandings and we need to remember them. A journal allows us to revisit those experiences at will and choose to learn from them or lose the moment to become distant memory. Release Pent-Up Emotions Enjoy giving full expression to all those devilish thoughts within you in privacy! You can vent your anger with full force and only your journal will know. It will not flinch in horror or disapproval! Keeping a journal brings about a feeling of catharsis and it is possible that a solution may also emerge. Count The Other Joy Of Journaling Journaling can be used to organise thoughts and to set goals. Once you write down your goals, the act of journaling can serve as an internal motivator to move you towards them. The act of writing has been proven by scientists to somehow stimulate the body to produce more T-cells, an invaluable component of the immune system. Writing about important life matters may even make it easier for one to access one’s memories. Kitty Klein, PhD, a researcher at North Carolina State University, led a study demonstrating that writing frees up the working memory. She reports in the ‘Journal of Experimental Psychology’ that writing helps put pain in the background. It moves discomfort out of the foreground of an experience so that the pain doesn’t run the life, control the experience or define the person involved. Start Today Journaling is an investment in yourself; it helps you live a more intense life. Writing your journey unfetters and frees you. So catch the moment How To Begin Your Journal •Select a blank notebook.It can be ordinary or fancy —anything that appeals to you. If you want to maintain an online diary, the computer will be your best friend. • Use a pen that feels most comfortable in your hands. You can also use pencils, paints... Write any time, anywhere about anything. For best results, write often. • What should you write about? Start by jotting down your activities. Journaling is not just about scribbling down what you had for breakfast — though it can be, if that is what you want. Write down your thoughts, opinions, feelings and ideas. Mix and match by looking outward as well as inward. Quotes that you want to memorise and apply in your life, poems and essays that you have written. You can stick pictures or draw instead. You can even paste mementos of your daily wanderings: A caricature, an air ticket, the photocopied lyrics of your favourite song, a movie stub, an invitation card... The Write Rules • You will not share. Keeping it exclusive will help you be completely honest when journaling. If you write thinking you may share your reflections, you may be tempted to write for another person, or even worse, you may begin writing to that person! •You will be honest in self-expression. •You will not feel obliged to spell correctly, write complete sentences or even use the right verb. You will write at the bottom of the page and go up, begin from right and go left... • You will date each entry in the journal. You may not see a reason to do this at that present time. <table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" width="100%"><tbody><tr><td class="text" align="right"> </td></tr></tbody></table>
Good articles! Hi Sonu, The articles on parenting was great......it is true that u need to be friends with your parents. The one on maintaining a journal was also good. I enjoyed reading both these. Thanks for sharing these with us..... Have a great day !
to sudhavnarasimhan hi, Its nice to hear that u enjoyed this articles.Actually it helped me alot so i felt to share with my friends here. Sonu
6 vital signs <startarticletitle>6 vital signs </startarticletitle>[font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]There’s only one surefire way to stop a health problem in its tracks — detect it early! This can be done by reading the signals your body sends out. Most of us get a faint idea when something is not quite right way before a health problem becomes apparent, but we tend to brush off that feeling, thinking it’s paranoia. [/font][font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]1. Bad breath [/font] [font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]If you suffer from bad breath, don’t attribute it to your diet. It could be a sign of periodontal disease. [/font] [font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]What is periodontal disease? Gum diseases such as gingivitis and periodontitis are infections, and it left untreated, it may lead to loss of tooth. Periodontal disease is a bacterial infection that affects gums and the bone supporting the teeth. Bacteria in plaque accumulated on your teeth causes an inflammation. Your gums may turn red, swell and bleed. In this condition, the tissues and bone supporting the teeth are broken down and destroyed. Your gums then separate from the teeth, causing the infection to progress. Smoking, stress, diabetes, poor nutrition and grinding your teeth out of habit contribute to developing this condition. [/font] [font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]2. Telltale fingernails [/font] [font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Fingernails are often one of the first things a doctor takes a look at while conducting a health examination. [/font] [font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Read your nails White spots on nails indicate an iron or zinc deficiency, but nails that are white at the base may indicate a liver problem. A Vitamin B and Vitamin B12 deficiency can cause ridges. Vertical ridges in particular indicate poor absorption of vitamins and minerals, or overall poor health. Nails that are a bit too flexible or brittle point to a calcium or protein deficiency. Always check with your medical practitioner or family doctor before consuming any medication, including vitamins. [/font] [font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]3. Up all night[/font] [font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Insomnia, or the inability to sleep, is one of the first signs of depression. Recent studies also suggest that it may trigger off depression.[/font] [font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Is it really insomnia? Everyone has trouble sleeping sometimes, but that doesn’t make them insomniacs. Look for these signs to check if you are one: • You find it difficult to fall asleep. • You do not get enough or satisfying sleep. • You often wake up during the night and can’t go back to sleep. Insomnia may be acute or chronic. Acute insomnia does not extend over long periods of time and is usually brought on by physical or emotional discomfort caused by an illness, loud noise or bright lighting. Chronic insomnia, on the other hand, can last for several days, months or even years. This form of insomnia is linked to high levels of stress and depression.[/font] [font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]4. ‘Sound’ sleep[/font] [font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Snoring is caused by vibrations of the relaxed throat tissues and is often associated with a condition known as sleep apnea. Here it is important to understand that sleep apnea may not always be the reason for snoring. Even a common cold could cause snoring.[/font] [font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]What is Sleep apnea? When it does occur, one may experience an obstruction in breathing. This is because tissues in the throat become relaxed. Sleep apnea has also been linked with certain cardiological problems, but treatment, and therefore aversion of such problems, is possible.[/font] [font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]5. Can you stomach it?[/font] [font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Pain in the abdomen can be attributed to a simple muscle pull, but can also be symptomatic of a much more serious condition. In order to know the difference, ask yourself the following questions: • Is it a severe cramp? • Is it accompanied by vomiting or nausea? • Check whether you have a fever? If your answer is positive, you may have appendicitis or an inflammation of the appendix. [/font] [font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]What is appendicitis? This is an inflammation of the appendix, a tiny organ in the lower right side of the body. This organ opens into the intestine and when the opening gets blocked, the appendix becomes vulnerable to bacterial infection. If you suspect this condition, it is advisable to seek medical attention immediately as urgent removal of the organ may be warranted, should the appendix be close to bursting. [/font] [font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]6. A pain to eat[/font] [font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Mouth ulcers may manifest as a minor annoyance, but can make swallowing or chewing a painful experience. They are also called canker sores and may be brought on by stress or food allergies. They have also been associated with the following conditions: • Hormonal changes: Women have often complained about mouth ulcers that occur during their menstrual cycle every month. • Medical conditions: Mouth ulcers have commonly been seen to accompany upset stomachs, Inflammatory Bowel Syndrome (IBS) and other stomach ailments. • Deficiencies: Mouth ulcers are often caused by the deficiency of Vitamins B1, B2, B6, B12, C or due to insufficient amounts of zinc, folic acid, iron or calcium in the body. [/font]
Combat the scourge of dowry Combat the scourge of dowry Arranged marriages still hold good in India . If you are a young man with a good job and excellent prospects and are on the threshold of marriage, it is time you sit up and take notice of the prevalence of the shameful practice of demanding dowry. Awareness is after all the key to action. * Have a heart to heart discussion with your parents. Find out their intentions. They may be broadminded in most matters, but how do they intend to find a bride for you? * Should they, by any chance, mention that they are looking out for a girl who would be coming into the family with plenty of money, you may be in trouble. Probe a little further – find out if it is just a rich background they are looking for, or do they expect her parents to bestow wealth on her as a precondition to the marriage. * You have to put your foot down and tell your parents that you have no intention of insisting on the girl's parents gifting you anything. No scooter, no car and definitely no flat! Insist that what you are looking for is a girl who would be compatible with you, who would fit into the family and simply become a member of your family in every way. If you have always dreamt of marrying an independent working girl who would do the family proud, you can mention it to your parents. It will help in narrowing down their search. * When you do get married, see that your bride is welcomed with open arms by your family. After all, she has left her loved ones and taken this extremely important step to be with you. See that no undue demands are being made. Give her space. She is an individual in her own right and you must respect her wishes. * Every drop of water contributes towards making the mighty ocean. Do your bit towards eliminating this shameful practice and you would have contributed in no small measure to the movement against dowry. If you are a girl who is about to get married, how do you ensure that you are not just a cog in the wheel for practioners of the dowry system? * Stand tall and firm in your resolve to see that your parents are not exploited. Have a frank discussion with them and tell them that you will not get married to a man who is privy to a demand for dowry. * You could ask your parents to clarify whether there is going to be any such demand from the boy's people. If there is any indication in the affirmative, simply refuse to meet them. Tell your parents that you are not a commodity to be linked to money and material. * If you are a working girl, you have more reason to be independent and strong in your resolve. Earn respect by being firm. Your own self respect will only increase if you are articulate about your convictions. * Do not lose heart. Surely you will find a man who is in sync with your principles and ideology. Your courage of conviction is sure to impress the right man and the right family. It is the duty of every single individual to see that this bane of our society, this canker, this plague is eradicated forever thereby giving salvation to the hundreds of young girls and their families who go through hell and torture because of this degrading practice. Are we going to show solidarity in this resolve? What are your views on this? Do share your opinions with us and thousands of other Sitagita members on how best we can get rid of this evil, antiquated custom which should have no presence in the modern world.
Before you're 30 Before you're 30 <!--editPad Before you're 30 <INTRO>Get to know how to deal with money, health and more such aspects before you turn 30.</INTRO><IMAGE1>C:\PUBLISHER\before30.jpg</IMAGE1><IMAGE2></IMAGE2><IMAGE3></IMAGE3><IMAGEI>C:\PUBLISHER\before30_hp.jpg</IMAGEI><ALT1></ALT1><ALT2></ALT2><ALT3></ALT3><KEY>credit card, planning, safeguard, fitness, health, money</KEY><ALIGN1>Right</ALIGN1><ALIGN2></ALIGN2><ALIGN3></ALIGN3><ALIGNI>Right</ALIGNI><SECTION1></SECTION1><SECTION2></SECTION2><COVER>2</COVER> editPad--> Life has been a lark so far. But how far can you go on a lark? Will it help you when youth starts saying goodbye? You're on the right side of thirty now. You still have time on your side. Enough time to stop fooling around and bring some order into your life. Time to think about the future. Start working on your bank balance, your health and fitness right now. Your Money Get one major credit card. Don't overspend. Set aside enough money for emergencies. Your goal should be to have at least three — or, better, six — months' living expenses in a liquid savings account (one you can get to immediately). Start investing in future goals, like a down payment for a house. Put 10 percent of every paycheck into an investment with maximum growth potential, such as a mutual fund. Start planning for retirement. If you're married, see an insurance agent. Buy policies for life and health when you're young and healthy to lock in a low rate. Draw up a will and establish power of attorney. A living will or power of attorney for health care will also allow you to make medical decisions for a spouse who's too ill to do so. Your Health Have a complete physical. Get baseline readings on blood pressure, cholesterol, and all your body's other systems so that changes can be noted in the future. Fill your doctor in on any medical problems your relatives have, so that he or she can recommend preventive steps or relevant screening. Safeguard your fertility by seeing a gynaecologist annually. Get plenty of calcium and folic acid. During your twenties, you can still add to density; guzzling milk later won't help. Another reason to care about calcium: It lowers the risk of high blood pressure during pregnancy. You can take a multivitamin that contains folic acid, or chow down on enriched grain products, citrus fruits, spinach, and raspberries — all rich sources. Fitness Tighten your abs. Toned abdominals will fight off bad posture and lower back pain in the future. You should do two sets of 25 abdominal crunches three times a week. Start practising stress relief. Chances are, you're already trying to do too much in too little time. A quick soother: Breathe in deeply and hold for about four seconds, then slowly exhale, concentrating on blowing out all the tension in your body.
Etiquette Minding your ps and qs What is etiquette? It's not as difficult as it sounds - "eti ket " is how it sounds, by the way. It is merely a correct code of conduct - or social graces - or very simply, the right thing to do at the right time and place in the right way. Or as the English would say, the 'propah' way of doing anything. Now that opens up a wide new horizon - is there a proper way of writing? Speaking? Eating? Answering the phone? Even sitting or standing? Yes there is. So what are we going to talk about first? Lets start with a situation that has often made some of us nervous and some of us squirm in embarrassment. Table manners - first, whether it is a formal gathering or a family meal, never rest your elbows on the table. It's bad manners. Did you know that? Next, when you want something, do ask someone to pass the dish to you - saying "please pass me the ….." or "may I have the ……please" and so on. NEVER reach out and grab a dish - particularly if it is away from you. Apart from being the 'improper' thing to do, you could drop the dish and oops! When you are asked if you need something, please do not say NO - or I don't want it - anything abrupt. The simple thing to say is, No, thank you or No thanks. Similarly, if you do want something, say Yes, please. Isn't it easy? When you have finished a meal, do not get up and leave - wait until the rest are through. Never make negative comments about food of any kind - "I hate desserts" or "how can anyone enjoy oily food", is hardly tasteful conversation - it may hurt someone in the group. If you are on a diet, simply choose to eat what you want - there is no need to announce your food habits to all and embarrass anyone. Never discuss illness and weight problems at meal times. After so many Don'ts - surely there must be a Do or two ? Yes - do relish your meal - do praise the host / hostess if you really think something is special ( watch out - artificial comments can be spotted easily) Do remember - etiquette is nothing but being your natural, considerate, decent self - so relax and enjoy.
10 ways to de-stress in the later years 10 ways to de-stress in the later years <!--editPad 10 Ways To De-stress in the Later Years <INTRO>"Grow old along with me, the best is yet to be…," said Robert Browning and he was right. The later years of life can certainly be enjoyable. </INTRO><IMAGE1>E:\Editorialprocess\Prabha\QCIMAGE\Home Page\Today images\destress.jpg</IMAGE1><IMAGE2></IMAGE2><IMAGE3></IMAGE3><IMAGEI>E:\Editorialprocess\Prabha\QCIMAGE\Home Page\Today images\destress_hp.jpg</IMAGEI><ALT1></ALT1><ALT2></ALT2><ALT3></ALT3><KEY></KEY><ALIGN1>Right</ALIGN1><ALIGN2></ALIGN2><ALIGN3></ALIGN3><ALIGNI>Right</ALIGNI><SECTION1></SECTION1><SECTION2></SECTION2><COVER>0</COVER> editPad--> "Grow old along with me, the best is yet to be…," said Robert Browning and he was right. The later years of life can certainly be enjoyable. There is a sense of balance and poise as one ages. This is the period to take stock of oneself, both physically and spiritually. Negative eating habits developed over the years, the lack of exercises, apart from ineffective breathing, collectively begin to give rise to physical discomfort during this period. Digestive disorders, sleeplessness, arthritis, and improper blood circulation are some of the common difficulties experienced at this age. Talking to your children or grand children will relieve stress. Here are ten tips to make the later years a wonderful experience. The first thing one has to bear in mind is that your major responsibilities are over. Be positive about everything. Good thoughts make a good body. Play soulful instrumental music in the mornings, like flute or some bhakti songs. Music helps to lift the spirits. Walking is a rejuvenating experience. It has to be slow and peaceful. Talking with other people and sharing your thoughts with others are positive outlets. The body has great regenerative powers. Simple exercises and modified yogasanas like Makarasana,( lying on the abdomen, eyes closed with the palms kept one on top of the other). Paschimottanasana (Forward Bend) and Padahastasana(touching toes or at least the knees). These two exercises can be done in the standing posture. These can even be done with a backrest or pillow or sitting on the chair. Whenever there is discomfort, either in walking or while doing exercises, do the Shavasana or the corpse pose. Meditation helps to soothe the mind. Sit in the pose you are comfortable in, and concentrate on a beautiful flower or happy moment of your life. Eyes should be closed. If you are lonely, meditation will give you solace. Do take time off to watch your favourite television show or indulge yourself by watching a movie. Warm coconut oil mixed with a few camphor pieces can be used to massage stiff joints. In winter or in the rainy season, warm mustard oil can be gently massaged. Get oil body massage done once a fortnight, either with coconut oil or with gingili oil. In case you have access to aromatic oils, go ahead and get a massage done with it. Cook a favourite dish for your children or grandchildren. Remember our mothers did knitting and sewing? If your vision is good, knit or sew once in a while. It is a good exercise for the joints and helps relieve stress. Do keep the above in mind and live a happy and healthy life.
