I think my husband is not who I thought he was....

ASG, I beg to differ on your comment that someone's very strong. A strength of the person is intact as long as they don't need to be in a messy situation to tackle. Any human being when they are subjected to rude shock, it will take a while for them to bounce back.

I found you to be very strong when you asked someone to retaliate at the MIL by calling the MIL a fat-ugly-cow (sorry don't remember what cow it was).

Now, you are unable to kick your husband easily because you have been emotionally involved. Anyone when they are emotionally threatened they will get confused. At any given point, never ever give-up your clarity of mind! Don't allow anyone to trample you. You are precious to yourself.

 

Dear ASG

I am too shocked by your post. I believe you are very matured at your age . I read all your posts and i did wonder about understanding you have .You are ardent believer in God...keep believing . God will always help you ..... Be cool and calm...wait and watch..then take the decision.... Hugs to you ASG ....I am sure with your level of maturity you will always solve all your problems

 

This is indeed possible. I have personally experienced this so called "Black magic" May be, your MIL could have done something bad to separate you from your DH. Anyways, I don't want to lead you in a wrong way. Just be positive!

ASG, I always admire your love for your husband. Now I am confused how he changed all of a sudden?? TRUST is the basic element in married life and I can understand how it hurts you.I know you are a matured girl....just wait and watch for few more days to know where it leads. Then you talk to your DH about the issue.

Take care!

 

Dear ASG,

Now that you have cried enough, Get up and make yourself some hot tea/coffee and relax. The heart pain is the worst pain, damn it pains more than any physical wound.

I guess more than your MIL, the idea of your husband and this lady being together hurts you more (it will hurt any normal woman).

I seriously doubt that your husband will take things further with this model. You are in US and she is in India, so there is time for the physical intimacy to happen. Moreover, it also depends on the girl how she will react to your husband. So just wait and watch for sometime. It might just end on cyber S**.

Even if he does go to her, he is the one at loss. Lets not even discuss what he is going after.

If you decide to move out of this marriage, then your husband will have a real tough time getting someone else in, except may be for the ex-wife. Any woman with brains will think twice about moving in with a man with 2 divorces. Your MIL is doing nothing but ruining her own son's life.

So you see, nothing bad is happening to you dear. Life for you will be good in both ways. I understand that you are feeling cheated and the best way to stop hurting is to confront your husband, do it now or whenever you want but one thing is sure to happen after confrontation, your doubts will be cleared for good.

There is no point is keep crying and hurting. You have cried enough, now get up and embrace the day and the world.

 

Dear ASG,

Like all others I am also quite surprised to read your thread..Then I realise afterall we are all humans and our life's phase changes from time to time...
yeah one can be a very good counsellor but when the counsellor is itself in trouble our mind stops working..Its true...
ASG dear I suggest to you is talk to him directly about all these stuffs which you have been seen...Enquire the way he answers I am sure you are intelligent enough to judge his motive and thinking..
After which you could take teh next step.Dont get tensed..Eat properly..
Sleep Properly.I shall remember you in my prayers to give you strength and will power. I dont believe in Black Magic and if at all it exists also you can overcome with your faith and prayers on Almighty...
Think practical ways to resolve your issues with the help of God.
Everything is in Gods hand...He will do the best for you..Dont worry dear.Take Care..I pray & believe that this hard days will vanish in no time..Be Cheerful.We are there for you.Dont give up hope.Love you dear.

 

ASG,

I have read few of your post and your replies.
I genrally read a few post and then go ahead and post my comment. In your case, There are 3 pages of comment before I am writing to you , I read each and ever comment before I could write to you.

The reason behind me being too concerned is, this would be the way ever women would write in your situation. The tolerance capacity that GOD gives each induvidual differs.
At 1st for me it was a shock of life , for someone like ASG undergoing something like this. Not that you gave advices and that I read those fancy line from you that you love your DH and so on...only that somehow there creates a bonding for with some people in IL just by reading their posts/comments. My heart aches for if it would have been my own sister.

Believe me, I have no strength to tell you to walk out of the marriage, neither do I want you to stay there, even I wish, how if all this were just a dream....
It is easy to advice , but dificult to follow....Well I don't believe in this , as I am not even able to advice you now...

Porbebly your right, wait for few week, don't let him get the clue that your checking on him. Keep checking...do come back and write.

In the meanwhile I pray for you and all I pray is...

"A better mental strength, a better , stronger heart to accept and take betrayal, May my lord give you this for timing...I am sure this will help you".
I am a fan of lord Krishna- I call him Kitta, I have named my DS also the same...
He would stay with you dear.
And your MIL, I do suspect ..that the BM is working.. I too don't belive in it totally, but circumtances make a man believe in it.


Lots of love and hug to you, Try to cry a lil less,

Kavitha.

 

ASG - God I really feel for you. Am wordless for you ! Reading all your messages, have developed some sort of a coziness towards you. Now, for the matter at hand.

First of all, follow others advises regarding removing of all signs of BM, which you are able to see in your house. Sprinkle the ganga jal / bleach and do your prayers. You know what, GOD never leaves us, it is only us, who think about BAD about him, the moment we sense our life going topsy turvy ! BELIEVE GOD, he will show you the right path, eitherways !

Secondly, let this week passby, see the messages from your husband on FB. Then, when it turns too ugly, confront him ! Ask him to explain his behaviour. He may try to rebuff you, but then show his the proof. Then play it by your ears and heart. Do not rush into either breaking or patching. Give a good thought, morever, we are always with you in every step of yours !

Be brave, do not desert yourself, when you have no one around to support you.

Will get back tomorrow ! Take care of yourself !

 

ASG, but why he was good to you all these years and now going back to the same old filthy habits??! I feel your DH cannot stay in a relationship for many years. After 5 years, he wants a new woman in his life. Whatever it is, you didn't do anything bad to hurt him. It was him, who is not worthy enough to have you. Relax please!

As you said, wait for the solid proof and then have a talk with him. First of all,you need strength to come out of these problems. So calm down and think.

My sincere prayers for you. Hope this should not be true and your life comes back to track.