1. Have an Interesting Snippet to Share : Click Here
    Dismiss Notice
  2. Would you like to join the IL team? See open jobs!
    Dismiss Notice
  3. Liked anything that you read here? You may nominate it as the Finest Posts!
    Dismiss Notice
  4. What can you teach someone online? Tell us here!
    Dismiss Notice
  5. If someone taught you via skype, what would you want to learn? Tell us here!
    Dismiss Notice

I am a complete man!

Discussion in 'Cheeniya's Senile Ramblings' started by Cheeniya, Mar 2, 2010.

  1. Cheeniya

    Cheeniya Super Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    11,972
    Likes Received:
    15,095
    Trophy Points:
    538
    Gender:
    Male
    I am a complete man.
    No,no, not the kind of Complete Man that you see in a Raymond’s ad but just a complete man. At 67, I have everything that a man of my age should have. A bit of sugar that makes a good cup of coffee really interesting. An impatient heart that beats an occasional extra beat or two which they call an ectopic heart. It is always a nice feeling that the abnormality that we have has a technical name. That makes it a lot easier to communicate with a Doctor unless it happens to be a Dr.Moron who tells you to just stick to description of your symptoms and leave the naming ceremony to him. It is possible that they get upset about your mentioning a technical term after few minutes of browsing through Wikepedia when they could become privy to that information only after several years of grueling study in a Medical College that charged them a hefty capitation fee! My followers in IL would remember how my brain erupted a couple of years back but now it is a dormant volcano. Comprehensive tests and scans have revealed that it is fit enough for Senile Ramblings!

    Most of the fans of the ace humorist Jerome K. Jerome would have come across his classic essay in Lapham’s Quarterly , a magazine of history and ideas, about how he chanced upon a medical journal that gave a vivid description of various diseases. Reading through the pages of that fateful journal, he discovered to his shock and dismay that he had all the diseases in some degree or other! He realized what an interesting case he must be from a medical point of view, what an acquisition he should be to a class! Students would have no need to “walk to the hospitals” if they had him. He was a hospital in himself. All they need to do would be to walk round him, and after that, take their diploma! He concludes that ‘I had walked into that reading room a happy, healthy man. I crawled out a decrepit wreck.’!

    I am mentioning Jerome not to tell you that I am a similar character. I am a lot tougher than him. I am happy about the wealth of information that is available in the Internet about the diseases and cures. I always hold a strong view that a known devil is better than an unknown angel. What I mean is that if I suffer from anything about which there a million sites on the Internet, I feel comfortable that what I have is shared by a million people worldwide. To me, knowledge is power. But unfortunately, my Doctor does not share my enthusiasm for knowledge. The moment he sees me entering his consulting room, he loses his poise and starts fidgeting with his stethoscope. I get a feeling that he is not happy about my being as knowledgeable as he is. When I reel out all the technical details with their respective nomenclature, he responds like Chief Inspector Dreyfus on seeing the lowly Inspector Clouseau solving a crime through by chance in Pink Panther!

    Let me now come to the crux of the matter. Because of some confounding abnormalities in my health system, my Doctors had advised me to go slow on my exercise regimen. In any case, it suited me too for I am not one of those exercise freaks who go through the entire gamut of exercise machines just to have their bodies festooned with bulges of different sizes. On the contrary, whenever, I feel an urge to exercise, I just lie down until the urge passes off safely. My exercise is mostly confined to pedalling an imaginary bike furiously until I fall asleep. I believe in the power of autosuggestion of ‘Day by day, in every way, I am getting stronger and healthier’. After putting me through a series of diagnostic tests, my Dr.Dreyfus summoned me and announced cheerfully that there was no need for me to visit him for another year. He then dropped the bombshell that I could resume my exercise regimen too.

    I was just devastated by this announcement. I picked up the almanac and selected a far off auspicious day to start the damn routine so that until then I could sleep peacefully. I was thus playing a cat and mouse game with starting on my exercise. It went on like this for a few days until one day, a friend of mine started talking to me standing behind me thinking it was my front. When the sound of my response came from the other side, he was startled no end. I knew then that there could be no further excuse when people found it difficult from which side to talk to me! With the reminder of Robert Frost that I have miles to go before I sleep again, I threw the blanket away and started. Next time, if you meet someone looking cheerful and bronzed, don’t side step him.It will be TVS in the mould of who is that guy in Jogger’s Park? Victor Banerjee, chased by Perizaad Zorabian of course!
     
    Last edited: Aug 2, 2020
    3 people like this.
    Loading...

  2. Shanvy

    Shanvy IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    23,654
    Likes Received:
    27,155
    Trophy Points:
    590
    Gender:
    Female
    Sri,

    I am happy that you are complete, healthy and back to form according to your doctor.

    my cardiologist,asks me to leave all the information that we garner outside the door. he says that i should step in with a open mind and trust (oh!sri, with the quacks being quacky, trust is a commodity that i would not freely give to this breed). well coming back to him, oh! you need to reduce your weight, but your heart is happy, and I am happy, don't stop the medicines. Why do they always have a if and but.. well i am only having the moon and starts for company when i walk on my terrace these days..

    I am sure mrs.sri would like to keep watch and company. any ways let us leave all the perizaad to Kamalji.

    take care.
     
  3. Chitvish

    Chitvish Moderator IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    33,568
    Likes Received:
    3,741
    Trophy Points:
    490
    Gender:
    Female
    Dear Sri,
    Brilliant self-analysis, by a complete man of himself!
    It is interesting to read that you have come to the conclusion that your front and back look similar. You have a beard in the front – the corresponding place at the back is, ‘blank’!!:biggrin2:
    So, no worries!
    I always admire the immense patience of your doctor, God bless him. You have the habit of verifying on the net whether the medicines given to you are correct. Strangely, if the net says, one in a million might get a chronic cough for a specific medicine, you go in for it dutifully.
    Your love to be the exception is exceptional at times.
    You love to give excuses and here, you are, for your non-exercise routine!!
    Don’t rule out my coming here again.
    Love,
    Chithra.
     
  4. sundarusha

    sundarusha Gold IL'ite

    Messages:
    3,427
    Likes Received:
    181
    Trophy Points:
    160
    Gender:
    Female
    Dear Cheeniya sir,

    a refreshing post written as usual in your inimitable style.

    Reading about your doctor's unhappiness about your being as knowledgeable as he was about the technical details and respective nomenclature only reminded me of the conversation in an old movie where Thangavelu seriously tries to explain to the fellow actress the steps to make poori and kizhangu. After he finishes explaining each step, she would say 'athaan theriyume'. But knowing you, you must have thoroughly researched before talking with him.

    I agree with you that knowledge is power and a doctor should be pleased that his patient is proactive about his/her health and do atleast half the reserach about their maladies before visiting with him.

    Relieved to know that the doctor has given you a clean bill of health and given his okay for you to continue with the exercise regimen.

    As Dr. Seuss's describes in his book You are only old once, every minute is to enjoyed, sir. May be, it is for this precious reason it is called the golden years.

    Take care
     
    Last edited: Mar 2, 2010
  5. Cheeniya

    Cheeniya Super Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    11,972
    Likes Received:
    15,095
    Trophy Points:
    538
    Gender:
    Male
    Dear Shanthi
    Your concert for my health touches my heart. It is true that I have my ups and downs but it is as though that I am destined to dole out a hefty periodical fee to the medicos! Probably in my previous birth I might have fleeced my patients as a Doctor and in this janma I am just repaying it!

    Incidentally, expressed concern worries me a lot like people inquiring 'why have you put on so much weight?' 'Where is your neck?' and things like that! I always love a jolly good assessment!
    Sri
    PS: I wonder how this Kamalji has been able to project such an image of himself that the ILites are so lavish in showering the goodies on him! Now Perizaad too!
     
    Last edited: Mar 2, 2010
  6. Cheeniya

    Cheeniya Super Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    11,972
    Likes Received:
    15,095
    Trophy Points:
    538
    Gender:
    Male
    Dear Chithra
    That is the 17th time you are commenting on the hair that has deserted me. In Army, they hardly talk about deserters and if at all, a conversation about them ensues, it would be all hush hush! In every meeting of ours, I had carefully kept the back of my head away from your notice but nothing escapes your keen eyes. As far as I am concerned, I am happy and proud of the few strands that have stood by me through thick and thin. Please don't talk disparagingly about them!

    As Shanthi says, there are quite a few quacks having lucrative practice. The only way to make sure ours is not one of them is to put him through all our awesome knowledge! If a medicine can produce cough in one in a million, I would like to be that 'one' as there is no other way I can stand out in a crowd!
    Sri
     
  7. Deaf woman

    Deaf woman Senior IL'ite

    Messages:
    452
    Likes Received:
    3
    Trophy Points:
    20
    Gender:
    Female
    Dear cheeniya sir,
    Glad to read your ramblings after a long time.Reading the title ,i thought you are talking about the similarities of raymond's man and you.Good to know Doctor gave you clean chit .I too have the habit of googling every medicine doctor prescribes to our family .Of course i wouldn't dare to discuss the same with the doc but will try to check if the medicines are safe or not.
    About exercise, me and dh have a stand off always.He tries his best to convince me to go for a walk or do some pranayama ,but i will shrug off saying i will start from next month or so.Enjoyed your write up.Now that you are fit as fiddle ,can we expect your ramblings daily?
     
  8. Cheeniya

    Cheeniya Super Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    11,972
    Likes Received:
    15,095
    Trophy Points:
    538
    Gender:
    Male
    My dear Usha
    The actress who did that role was T.P.Muthulakshmi. If her saying in a monotonous tone 'Athan teriyume' was itself hilarious, Thangavelu's reactions were superb! But who is Muthulakshmi here? The patient or the Doctor?

    I certainly do research even on ordinary headaches so that the Docs can't get away with some half hearted treatment! We pay them so much and they just can't take the patients for granted.

    Yes! The Docs feel that I must get on with my physical routine at least for an hour a day. Very soon, it's going to be a highly rejuvenated, refurbished, and trim Cheeniya. No more taking me on 'as is where is' condition!

    'You are only old once' you say. I often wish I had been old all through my life. I love it so much!
    Sri
    Sri
     
  9. Cheeniya

    Cheeniya Super Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    11,972
    Likes Received:
    15,095
    Trophy Points:
    538
    Gender:
    Male
    Dear Vijji
    The Doctor's chit was only half clean. I made it a lot cleaner!
    Americans scare the wits out of us with their extremely safe attitude.If you give them a tablet, they'll keep it in their mouth for an hour to make sure that there is no adverse reaction and then only swallow it! If we go through the web sites, we'll come to the conclusion that is better to leave our cure in God's hands like a Pentecost Christian than taking any of these medicines!

    I assure you that you'll see my Rambling more regularly from now on but a daily thread is the prerogative of only my younger sister Iyerviji!
    Sri
    PS: I must ask Dr.Padmini about the origin of the phrase 'fit as a fiddle'
     
  10. sudhavnarasimhan

    sudhavnarasimhan Silver IL'ite

    Messages:
    1,310
    Likes Received:
    18
    Trophy Points:
    70
    Gender:
    Female
    Dear Cheeniya,

    Glad to be here after a loong break.....and that too catching up on your rambling after a few hours of it being posted.....feels great actually to be a part like before!

    As usual, was wondering where you are heading and ha ha.....you are reminding me also that i too need to someDay start exercising before its toooo late!:biglaugh
    Of course those auspicious days dont turn up at all, wonder where they disappear and i am back sitting on the couch looking at the calendar all over again and of course the weather report too to fix a warm, sunny (not too hot), pleasant day.....which seems to be a DREAM only of late here ! Also not to miss the hurricane i was caught in on last sunday,( missed reading the weather report!) after which i did not dare step out at all!
    So i can agree with your point of view.....I guess the same applies there too na, what with the sun shining back now,:;Whether you will have Perizaad with you or behind you, i guess the sun will definetely be with you!:rotfl:thumbsup

    PS: So what's the latest take after Abhi has exited gracefully? Someone was telling my mom that she should take a break that time and not get addicted to the next new serial in that spot! Of course she right royally pretended to be deaf at that point! Maybe everyone can take a braek and start their walking , jogging routines in that slot! Sad or glad that i dont have the Sun tv connection here....is yet to be decided!:hide:
     

Share This Page