Husband Telling He Can Replace Me With Nanny

Short and straight answer : show it to him your worth. Tell him to appoint a nanny and pay huge bucks for taking care of the kids. Stop doing anything that you are doing till now (wife duties) whether cooking, cleaning, keeping stuff in place or even physical pleasure that he is getting from you (if any).
Try for a few days. Pickup your old hobby or develop a new hobby and indulge in it. Try shopping some new dresses or clothes that usually you wont dare to wear. Go and dare it!
Try a new hair cut or experiment with your hair style. Spend time in taking care of your skin, go workout in gym or morning jogs.
Gain your self worth and self confidence back. Meanwhile try to findout what jobs you can apply for and try to upgrade your skills too.
Life is too short to let someone (be it parent or sibling or husband or inlaws) to make you feel worthless.
The problem is not them saying it to you on your face. The problem is you allowing them to dare say this.
Go lady bird....ja jee le apni zindagi

 

Nanny can never ever replace a mom.period.

The love,the adoration without any expectations only mom can give.

Trust me..10 days you stop doing what u are doing..people will understand your value.

Before that you need to understand your value dear


Also..I feel be it working or not..should be a personal priority and not reasons like taking care of kids this and that.

When I was a homemaker..I stayed back coz I liked my space and freedom and I felt awesome being home.I did not stay back for my kids.it’s my life and choice to be at home and for me it was fun.


Now am working..it is also for me.I chose work carefully and the timings and nothing hectic.

Tomorrow if I go back being at home..I will still be happy.


it’s not about wat U do but why u r doing it ,what for you are doing it gives you the right confidence.

even your husband cannot make u feel weak.You should not give him the power.

empower yourself and make the choice u love.

start by doing what u love.recreate yourself.No one can make you feel low without u allowing it.

be it husband or anyone else will say zillion things based on their moods,perceptions and to prove to themselves that they are doing the right thing in life.Throw that out and get empowered.


Good luck dear.U are awesome.Remember that.

 

Nanny cannot fulfill mom care! Ask him will he replace his mom for a nanny! Nanny can be a help to a mom not for the family as such. I feel I appoint a nanny to help u ! U just become a guide !

 

The most important thing in any kind of argument, particularly when the other person is trying to shame you, is to give it back. Logic doesn't matter, the other person should fear speaking nonsense next time. Think of the powerful people you have seen in your life. Would anyone dare to make loose talk with them.

The response should be:

Husband: if you are not happy you can also feel free to find someone
Me :Thanks for the advice. I know how to make my own decisions with regards to this matter. You can tell me if I ask for advice.

Husband: I have kept you happy..thats why....its me whoo is keeping you so happy
Me : Yeah, keep dreaming


Husband: I don't have a problem...I can easily appoint a nanny and take care of them...you are free to go if you want to...
Me : You can also feel free to go if you want to. I can easily appoint a servant to take care of the work you do. Just keep paying the money I and the kids are entitled to.

Sometimes people can go a step too far thinking its funny. Its important to put them in their place.

Don't sweat over these kind of banter. Be prepared the next time and every time.

 

Try to be calm and not escalate the conflict, just remind him there is lot more involved in being a mother vs a nanny would be my advice. According to "modern ladies" advice you can "put your husband in his place" and "yell at him till he trembles in fear" and will not dare to repeat this behavior. Try both and let us know which works better

 

Lol .
Nanny is never equal to mom.
Nanny will have specific pay for days and nights.
If the kid is a night waking one, God help your husband

 

Husband: I don't have a problem...I can easily appoint a nanny and take care of them...you are free to go if you want to...
Me: Ofcourse you can! so tell me when are you going to start paying me back for all the nanny duties i did for the past XXX years?
Its alright if you cant pay it at one go! I am willing to convert it all to EMI to make it easier for you.

1 of the most important life lessons, giving it back in the same form that we get it from them. Smile and say those words.

Dont yell, argue, cry coz it all means that you take their words seriously. If the words hurt you a lot, just say something and leave the place. Give yourself a pat on your back for all the effort you put into making the family work and stay together and for being the root cause for their acheivements.

You become a commodity only when you chose to be one. Dont let his words fool you into thinking you are nothing but a waste of space or easily replaceble.

Honestly Mirrorimage, tell me something. Do you really need someone else to feel special for who you are? Let me tell you that i am a working mom. I can afford to be one coz i have my mom help me with the work at home. Leave me alone to manage the house and i get so freaked out, i panic and have a breakdown.

The worth of our sacrifices is known only to us. Its impossible that anyone else will understand how much our dreams meant to us.

I would advise you to -

1) Stop taking your husband's words seriously. They are just his opinons and not the absolute truth.

2) Take a break occasionally and treat yourself for all that you did. I still do. Pat yourself on your back and say good job. Or better yet, look into your mirrorimage and say good job! you made it!

3) Not ignore your wishes and dreams. Maybe you might have left your career but you still have your hobbies. OR maybe you can start small by working from home.

You are special. Dont let anyone tell you otherwise. Its ok if they dont see your awesomeness. Just remember that just coz they are blind doesnt mean you are worthless. They are not fit to know your worth. That's all!